


Contritus

by starseeker95



Series: A Prime and His Second [1]
Category: The Transformers (IDW Generation One), Transformers - All Media Types
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Amica Endurae, Angst, Body Worship, Canon-Typical Violence, Conjunx Endura, First Time, Gentle Sex, Hurt/Comfort, Injury Recovery, Loss of Virginity, M/M, Oral Sex, Physical Abuse, Psychological Trauma, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Slow Burn, Spark Sexual Interfacing, Sticky Sexual Interfacing, Transformers Spark Bonds, Vibrating Spike
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-02
Updated: 2018-06-08
Packaged: 2019-05-01 05:35:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 51
Words: 72,691
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14513655
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starseeker95/pseuds/starseeker95
Summary: Rodimus has been trapped in an abusive relationship with his co-captain. He believes that he deserves the treatment, convinced that he is unworthy of anything different. After all, he is impulsive, hot-headed and stubborn. Who would have the patience for someone like Rodimus?As it would turn out, Ultra Magnus has more than enough patience to give... and perhaps more than that for Rodimus Prime.





	1. Chapter 1

“What were you thinking?!”

“I wasn’t.”

“ _Louder! _”__

__Rodimus shuddered at the finger thrust in his face. “I wasn’t thinking.”_ _

__Megatron withdraw his hand, a look of disgust on his face plates. “Because you’re an infantile, sorry excuse for a captain.”_ _

__When the ex-Warlord turned his back on Rodimus, the smaller bot released a held exvent. He soon realized his mistake. Without pause, Megatron spun, hand outstretched to connect with Rodimus’ cheek. Well used to such treatment, the red mech stopped himself from releasing a squeak of surprised pain as his helm spun to the side._ _

__Megatron squared his shoulders and flicked his hand, as if touching the prime had contaminated him. “You’ll do better next time.”_ _

__“Yes, sir.”_ _

__The silver mech gave Rodimus a last considering look before exiting the room. The speedster was careful to keep his attention on the floor until the other bot had gone._ _

__Once alone, he commed Drift. :Drift, I-:_ _

__Rodimus had to stop for fear of loosing control. Drift couldn’t know what was happening to him, it would only get the white speedster hurt or worse. There was already tension between Megatron and Drift, considering the past they shared-_ _

__:-imus? Roddy, you there?:_ _

__Rodimus struggled to reset his vocalizer and spat some energon from a nicked lip plate onto the floor. “Don’t think I’m gonna make it to spar today. S-sorry.:_ _

__A brief pause on Drift’s end almost caused Rodimus’ lines to freeze with fear. Did Drift know? After all, the knight knew a lot about meditating and stuff. What if he could sense what was really doing on, or what if Drift decided to just show up? The fear began to overwhelm Rodimus until Drift spoke again. :Uh, okay. You good? Maybe I could-:_ _

__:No! No, it’s cool. Go have fun with, Ratch, yeah? Or as much fun as he can have, anyways. Whatever you two get up to anyway-:_ _

__:Alright, Roddy. Hey, you and Megs have a fun night in, okay?:_ _

__:Yeah, you bet.:_ _

__The moment that the comm. closed, Rodimus collapsed onto his berthroom floor. Sobs racked his scuffed frame. He didn’t have the energy to fix any of the damage at the moment. Briefly, the red mech considered calling Ratchet and putting himself at the mercy of the medic’s sworn confidentiality, but somehow Rodimus knew that letting a single other bot know would only make Megatron’s punishment’s worse and harder to see._ _

__Who would believe him anyway? Megatron doted on him in public. The far bigger mech held his hand, hugged him close, brushed his mouth across Rodimus’ in feigned affection. The ex-Decepticon had miraculous control over his field, easily manipulating it into a collage of happiness and praise whenever he was around Rodimus with others. The façade fell apart when it was just the two of them together._ _

__It hadn’t always been like this. At first, Megatron had been like a magnet or a flame, drawing Rodimus in with his charisma and quiet resolve. The silver mech had captured the young prime, had owned him in both processor and in chassis within no time at all. Rodimus had willingly succumbed to the other’s affections, always believing nimself to be too immature and unworthy to ever be loved. But Megatorn had seemed to look past it all, choosing Rodimus to douse with his attentions._ _

__Sure, Megatron had chastised Rodimus for his impulsivity. The red mech knew that he could be brash at times. He welcomed the reminders at first, seeing them as things he could work on. He wanted to be worthy of his future conjunx and Rodimus was determined that Megatron’s leadership would guide him in such a way so that Rodimus would be molded into a mech that Optimus would be proud of._ _

__He wanted the attention. He wanted them to be proud of him. Optimus, Megatron, Drift, the whole crew! Rodimus had thought that Megatron could help him become that mech, someone that they could all depend on and look up to._ _

__Then, the accusations fell, starting with Megatron insisting that Rodimus and Drift were more than friends. Even as Rodimus denied it repeatedly, Megatron refused to believe him, driving Rodimus to the point of actively avoiding his amica endura. It had nearly ruining his relationship with Drift._ _

__Drift hadn’t understood why Rodimus became distant and withdrawn. He assumed that Rodimus simply wanted more time with Megatron. After all, the knight had been the same way upon bonding with Ratchet when they both returned to the Lost Light._ _

__No, Rodimus couldn’t tell Ratchet. He thought of Rung, but reminded himself that Rung and Megatron got along, often sharing poems and other old-man stuff. Who could he trust? How could he escape?_ _

__Rodimus sank to the floor, cradling his heavily damaged arm as he did. They all looked up to Megatron, even with the ex-Warlord’s terrible past of seemingly endless murder and destruction. The crew didn’t believe in Rodimus, didn’t see him as a serious leader of their ship. Who would? He was sobbing on his floor after receiving a few bruises! What kind of leader did that?_ _

__“He’s right,” the prime whispered to the empty room. He allowed himself to slump to the floor and he closed his optics. Megatron was right. He would never be the leader that his crew needed. He couldn’t even keep them safe, couldn’t guarantee their safety aboard his ship._ _

__The image of a bot, taller than even Megatron, passed before Rodimus’ processor. His spark swirled in his chest at the thought of the towering blue mech with the deep, serene voice. Yes, Ultra Magnus was collected and steady, a natural leader. Rodimus, smiled, but it was quickly dashed away when he felt one of his cracked lip plates open anew and wash his mouth with freshly-spilled energon._ _

__The prime raked his sore glossa across his dentas and spat the energon onto the floor. Ultra Magnus could probably be trusted. In fact, Rodimus knew that the former Enforcer wouldn’t stand for the violence that occurred between the ship’s captains. Maybe he should tell-_ _

__Another wave of helplessness washed over Rodimus at the thought of admitting what Megatron was doing to him to the blue mech. He couldn’t ever tell Ultra Magnus._ _

__Lately, the young prime’s thoughts had wondered toward the former Enforcer, but Rodimus knew that he didn’t have a chance with him. Ultra Magnus was a stickler for rules and regulation, he would never allow such a power-imbalanced relationship. All the same, Rodimus couldn’t shake the feelings he was developing for his second-in-command._ _

__Rodimus knew he’d never be able to tell Ultra Magnus. Megatron would surely kill his co-captain before Rodimus got the chance to tell anyone. Besides, admitting both his abuse and his affections to Ultra Magnus would be fruitless. Megatron was right. Rodimus was not good enough to be cared for and he deserved everything that Megatron had given him._ _

__“Stupid, stupid, stupid-“_ _

__Joints creaking and armor shaking, Rodimus hauled himself to his peds and made his way to the berth. Later on, Megatron would return. The silver mech wouldn’t be happy to find Rodimus’ energon smeared across the berth, but the prime couldn’t force himself to care. The punishment would be swift at least._ _

__Rodimus nestled his battered face down into the bedding. Perhaps Megatron would deactivate him next time. As his healing nanites fought to fix the least severe of his injuries, he found that he truly didn’t care anymore._ _


	2. Chapter 2

Drift’s fans fought to bring his core temperature down.

He blinked lazily at the ceiling and allowed his mouth to curl upward in a satisfied smile. Drift listened to his conjunx as the older mech’s vents rattled gently with every exvent. The medic was tucked under Drift’s arm, snoring softly. Ratchet, usually so stiff and serious, had been reduced to a writhing mess not much earlier.   
Drift’s smile grew at the memory of the medic’s face, optic’s hazy in his ecstasy, as Ratchet had willingly given himself over to the speedster’s care.

They’d taken it slow, rocking into each other as their pleasure built. Drift had taken the reins that evening; usually Ratchet did the spiking when they interfaced. But the look on the medic when Drift had released his own member… well. The white speedster reckoned that it would be a repeat if the medic’s reactions to his skills were any indication. Drift couldn’t help but fluff his armor with pride at his earlier performance.

Ratchet shifted from where his face was pressed up against Drift’s neck cables. The medic, still obviously coming down from the final overload, released his field to wash over his conjunx in waves of contentment.

As Drift’s hand rubbed soothing circles on his mate’s spinal strut, his thoughts wondered back to his earlier conversation with Rodimus. His amica hadn’t sounded right. 

The red mech’s avoidant behavior was becoming worrisome and Drift hadn’t seen him in several shifts. Not long ago, Rodimus had been downright avoidant of his friend, insisting that he needed space. At first, Drift had thought he simply wanted time to be with his intended, Megatron. But the thought of the silver ex-Warlord touching his amica sent shivers of unease through the white speedster’s chassis.

“Mmm, wha?”

Drift moved to look down at his awakening conjunx. Ratchet was looking up at him, one hand tracing glyphs on Drift’s chest plating. The speedster leaned in to plant a kiss in the middle of Ratchet’s chevron. “Just thinking.”

The medic yawned and wiggled further under Drift’s arm. Ratchet was unguarded in a way that only the white speedster got to see, relaxed in his conjunx’s embrace. But even in the berth, Ratchet’s optics were still sharp and so were his audials. He’d caught onto the unease in Drift’s voice. “What about?”

“Rodimus. He’s been acting strange. I’m… I’m worried.”

Ratchet snorted. “When is Rodimus not acting strange?”

“Ratchet.”

The medic sighed heavily. “Okay, okay. What do you think is going on?”

“I don’t know. He’s just… I never see him anymore. It’s not like him to be…”

“Quiet? Mature?”

Drift rolled away from his conjunx and ignored the hand that shot out to stop him. “I’m serious, Ratch. It’s bothering me. Wouldn’t it bother you if your amica suddenly wanted nothing to do with you?”

The former CMO rubbed a hand down his face and followed Drift to stand as they headed toward Drift’s private wash racks. “Maybe he just needs time with Megatron. I’m betting that he’s just trying to grow up for his sake. You know how Rodimus is, he probably wants Megatron’s approval and is giving him his full attention.”

Drift nodded, but couldn’t shake the feeling of foreboding that had settled low in his tank. “I don’t know-“

Ratchet rolled his optics upward. If Drift hadn’t known better, he might’ve thought the grumbling medic was praying. “Why don’t you go check on him then? It’ll put your mind at ease.”


	3. Chapter 3

Rodimus had just finished buffing out the worst of the scuffs and dents when he heard his habsuite door open. There were very few mechs that would simply enter without knocking. In fact, there were only two.

“Rodimus?”

_No. ___

__Panicking, Rodimus shoved the medical grade and other emergency aid items into the compartment he’d made for them in his wash area. The items clattered around as he tried to close the little door with trembling hands-_ _

__“Where are you?”_ _

__The young prime flailed hopelessly as the voice drew closer. Several items from his private arsenal fell onto the floor as he scrambled to tear the patches from his frame. The worst of the bruised lines had healed themselves already and Rodimus stuffed the healing patches into the little secret compartment too._ _

__“Why didn’t you answer me?”_ _

__Rodimus spun on the heels of his peds, catching himself on the door frame.  
Megatron towered over him, optics narrowed as he studied the smaller mech before him. Rodimus forced his gaze down and focused on the Autobot emblem on the ex-Warlord’s chest. Looking Megatron in the optics, at least in Rodimus case, had never gone over well._ _

__The prime swallowed heavily. “I-I didn’t hear you come in. I’m sorry.”_ _

__“You know I hate excuses, Rodimus.”_ _

__The speedster flinched at the sound of his name on the silver mech’s vocalizer. The end always tapered off in a growl as of late. Unsure of what to say, Rodimus teased his hands silently in front of himself._ _

__Megatron turned his back on the prime. “Get some energon heated. I’ve had a long cycle. You can do that can’t you?”_ _

__Rodimus scurried over to the energon dispenser and filled a cube as the silver mech moved to sit on the couch and retrieve a datapad._ _

__The red mech quickly poured in Megatron’s favorite spices and heated the cube to perfection. More than once, Rodimus had fixed the ex-Warlord’s end-of-shift energon. The fool’s energon that Megatron had agreed to fuel with was bitter and required flavoring in order to be even slightly tolerable. Even though the warlord had been weakened by it and had pledged a vow of non-violence, he still found the energy to torment Rodimus at every turn._ _

__The earlier “lesson” had loosened the wires in his hands. The cube slipped from between Rodimus’ numb fingers, falling in slow-motion toward the floor. He followed it down as he desperately tried to catch it on its way to the floor. Maybe if he avoided the crash it would make, Megatron wouldn’t notice and-_ _

__The cube shattered and dispersed on the floor, splashing fool’s energon across Rodimus’ face._ _

__Megatron was at the red mech’s side in an instant, glaring down at Rodimus from where he stood over him. Fury glittered in his optics, but his mouth was a straight line across, just like always. The ex-Warlord’s voice was deadly quiet as he spoke. “How clumsy of you, little prime.”_ _

__“I’ll just get a cloth-“_ _

__When Rodimus moved to stand, A large black hand pressed down on the back of his helm. Rodimus struggled for a moment as his face was crushed down onto the floor. The spilled energon stung the reopened cuts on his face. “No, you will not waste resources in such a way.” The hand pressed harder, grinding his facial plating into the floor. Rodimus suppressed a groan._ _

__Megatron’s field bore down on the prime’s. His next words forced every thought in Rodimus processor to freeze with horror._ _

__“Lick it up.”_ _

__He couldn’t be serious. “Come on, Megs, I-“_ _

__The toe end of a ped tapped against the side of Rodimus’ chest plating, an obvious warning. A threatening growl reached his audials.“ _Lick. It. Up. _”___ _

____A loud ding sounded. A correct code had been entered into the habsuite door._ _ _ _

____Megatron’s hand was immediately gone from his helm, instead moving to rest under Rodimus’ arm. When the red mech could lift his helm, he saw that his co-captain wore a mask of feigned concern and worry._ _ _ _

____“Roddy! What’s up? You wanna go- oh! Hey! You okay?”_ _ _ _

____Drift made his way across the room to them from the doorway. Before Rodimus could answer, Megatron was speaking. “He fell as he was bringing his energon over to the couch.”_ _ _ _

____The white speedster fixed Rodimus with a teasing look. “I keep telling you how much footwork practice would help your coordination, Roddy.”  
Instead of teasing his amica back like Drift expected, Rodimus appeared to withdraw deeper into himself. Closer examination allowed Drift to see the damage on his friend’s face. “You must’ve fallen pretty hard. Maybe Ratchet should-“_ _ _ _

____“It’s nothing he can’t handle. Right, Rodimus?”_ _ _ _

____Rodimus cursed Megatron privately as he lifted his optics to his amica endura. Even though Rodimus had told Megatron time and time again that he and Drift were just amicas, there was no denying the beauty that was the white speedster. He had a natural sway to his hips, a gloss that always shone on his shapely thighs. Drift and Rodimus had truly never been more than friends. But the other speedster’s alluring frame and easy smile made it all the more difficult to convince Megatron of such a thing._ _ _ _

____Even as Megatron answered for Rodimus, Drift never took his attention off of the prime. “You sure you’re good?”_ _ _ _

____Megatron’s field flared with warning where it was still intertwined with Rodimus’. “Yeah, it’s just a scratch or two.”_ _ _ _

____Drift made a face. “You wanna go spar? Or watch a movie? Swerve and Rewind have been working on getting some new Earth shows-“_ _ _ _

____Rodimus turned his gaze to Megatron and Drift felt his tank twist. The flame-colored mech hesitated every few moments, constantly fiddling with something and never meeting Drift’s or Megatron’s optics. Again, to Drift’s chagrin, Megatron answered for Rodimus. “A little workout wouldn’t hurt. What do you say, ‘Roddy’?”_ _ _ _

____The mech in question flinched openly then. “Y-yeah. Sure.”_ _ _ _

____Drift reached to grasp Rodimus hand only for the red mech to abruptly jerk away from the friendly touch. Before the white speedster could react, the red mech darted past him and out of the hab. Drift watched his amica leave before he connected optics with Megatron._ _ _ _

____The ex-Warlord had watched the interaction, a strange look in his optics. When Rodimus’ hurried steps faded down the hall, he looked over at Drift. The mech’s voice was cool. “You best catch up with your amica, hm?”_ _ _ _

____Drift held his ground. He’d seen the look of terror on Rodimus’ face, had felt the fear in his amica’s field. Drift had been a Decepticon once and, as much as he wanted to escape his past, it had taught him many things about Megatron. Perhaps better than anyone else, Drift knew what Megatron was capable of._ _ _ _

____Starscream was far from perfect, but he’d once been bright and beautiful. Not as suspicious or as vindictive. Megatron had made sure to poison any goodness left in the already overly-ambitious jet. Drift watched it all first hand, from the relationship’s beginning all the way to its terrible end. He wouldn’t stand by and let his Rodimus meet that same fate._ _ _ _

____Just because Megatron had traded his Decepitcon badge for an Autobot one, it didn’t mean that his abusive tendencies were over and done. The vow of one such as Megatron meant nothing to Drift; he knew all too well that any vow could be broken. He certainly wasn’t about to put it past Megatron._ _ _ _

____Drift stared at Megatron a moment longer before he backed to the door to follow after his amica._ _ _ _


	4. Chapter 4

It wasn’t until long after his shift was officially over that Ultra Magnus finished filing the last of his reports. All detailed and in order, the former Enforcer couldn’t quite quell the satisfied smile that graced his lips. After a few more moments of staring proudly down at the neatly stacked reports, he closed the cabinet and moved to his energon dispenser.

It had been a long shift. There had been the usual disturbances and citations to write at Swerves. The corrections that had to be made on Rodimus’ finished reports. Somehow, Ultra Magnus had had the time amongst the madness to read the Autobot Code through once. Feeling as if he had done his duty, the former Enforcer sat down on one of the chairs in his hab.

Nearest to his chair on the side table were the reports from Rodimus, reports that Ultra Magnus spent the majority of his shift correcting. The huge mech flicked the corner of one datapad with an equally large finger, tapping at the corner until the edges of the stack were perfectly aligned. Ultra Magnus definitely had his work cut out for him when it came to fixing the numerous mistakes in Rodimus’ datapads. Though he was occasionally put off by the continuous lack of care on the young prime’s part, the SIC also understood that Rodimus Prime, on some level, was committed to his captaincy and was trying to do the best he could for his crew.

Ultra Magnus cued his optics off and sipped slowly from the cube in his grip. Yes, the little prime was quite something, a confusing collage of hot-headed carelessness, stubborn resolve and genuine concern for those around himself. Rodimus fascinated the blue mech who often covered his fond feelings for the flame-emblazoned speedster with correction and disapproving looks. True, Rodimus’ antics grew tiresome. But Ultra Magnus knew from his time working alongside Optimus Prime that Rodimus would one day grow into himself and become a leader many would willingly follow.

Ultra Magnus rebooted his optics as his comm. sounded. :Ultra Magnus, sir?:

_Drift _. The large blue mech hesitated briefly. It was a rare cycle that the swordsmech called upon the SIC for assistance. :Yes, Drift?:__

__:You, uh, got a klik?:_ _

__Again, Ultra Magnus paused before answering, staring down at his barely touched cube of energon. Relaxing, it appeared, would have to wait. :Of course, come in.:_ _

__A beep and whoosh later, Drift was sauntering into the former Enforcer’s quarters. Without directly looking at him, Ultra Magnus selected a datapad from his sidetable and cued it on. “Drift, you know it is against regulation to hold meetings in private-“_ _

__“But it’s important-_ _

__“You understand that we should-“_ _

__“It’s Rodimus.”_ _

__At those words, UM stopped mid-sentence in his distracted reviewing of the datapad. Quickly, he rationalized a proper response before Drift could catch onto any hesitation. “Then perhaps you should speak to his co-captain-“_ _

__“No! Listen, something’s wrong, I know it. Roddy, he-“_ _

__Ultra Magnus raised an optical ridge. “What exactly is wrong?”_ _

__Drift scratched at a finial, a habit he’d picked up when he became uncomfortable. “I… I don’t know exactly. He’s not acting right.”_ _

__“Drift. I cannot help you if you have no evidence that there is something wrong with our captain.” As worrisome as the idea of something being wrong with Rodimus was, Ultra Magnus was determined to stick to regulation as possible._ _

__“I _do _if you’d listen! Rodimus has been showing up to spar with injuries. Not like he does when he races or slags off somebot at Swerve’s.” Drift paced rapidly before the huge blue mech, his hands clasped together as he wrung them. “He’s flinching and hurt and just not, _Roddy _.He hasn’t been okay for a while, but he won’t tell me what’s going on. I think… I think Megatron is the reason he’s so messed up all the time.”_____ _

______Ultra Magnus couldn’t stop his shock from coloring his field. “Are you claiming that Megatron is abusing his own intended? His co-captain? That’s a tall accusation, Drift. It’s treasonous, especially without definitive proof.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The white speedster’s optics were pleading as he gazed at the second-in-command. “Can you at least have Rung talk to him? If anybot could find out if Rodimus is being hurt, it’s Rung!”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I can’t force him to go see Rung.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Drift’s face fell slightly. “I know, but he listens to you!”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Ultra Magnus resisted the urge to roll his optics. “When has Rodimus ever heeded my instruction?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Immediately, he regretted his words. Drift’s brow dropped sharply in dismay as he stepped back and away. “He admires you quite a bit, Mags. Roddy tries his best and sure, he’s not perfect at being a captain, but he tries! And whatever Megatron is doing to him won’t resolve itself. He does listen to you, believe me. Just talk to him.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The former Enforcer glared down at the darkened datapad in his hand. What if Drift was right? What is Megatron were really causing Rodimus harm? An unexpected ball of anger began to coil deep in the blue mech’s tanks and he quickly tried to tamp it down. But Ultra Magnus couldn’t shake the thought of Rodimus injured by his own intended and the SIC was treated to sudden vision of his fist impacting Megatron’s nasal ridge._ _ _ _ _ _

______When he finally managed to cool the rage that had burnt low in his chassis, Ultra Magnus refocused his attention to find Drift staring at him. The white speedster’s finials, always so expressive, were cocked slightly like a quizzical Earth-beagle. Clearing his vocalizer, the blue mech averted his optics as he spoke. “I will speak with our captain concerning your theory. If he will not talk to me, I will suggest he speak with Rung. I cannot order him unless he proves himself to be unstable and, therefore, incapable of performing the duties of being a captain.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Relief filled Drift’s field as Ultra Magnus returned to studying the datapad. The SIC didn’t look up as the amica of his captain thanked him and moved toward the habsuite door. The speedster had just cued the door open when he turned back to the blue mech. “Magnus, if Megatron is hurting him…”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Drift’s faceplates and field both reflected the swordsmech’s resolve and Ultra Magnus understood the unfinished threat. Even if it ended with the speedster locked in the brig, there was nothing the SIC could do to dissuade him from retaliating in a very deadly way against the ex-warlord. Ranks wouldn’t matter. If the captain was injuring his amica, Drift would kill him. Ultra Magnus nodded in silent understanding and the white speedster disappeared into the hallway._ _ _ _ _ _

______Behind his chest plating, Ultra Magnus could feel his spark pounding violently. If Drift was right, the former Duly Appointed Enforcer of the Tyrest Accord had already made up his processor. Just the thought of the young prime being abused by his intended, the one bot he should be able to trust… well. If it was true, Megatron would have more than Drift to worry about._ _ _ _ _ _


	5. Chapter 5

Rodimus walked tall. He winked at the other bots at Swerve’s, even when his put-on smirk made his dislocated jaw ache. He sparred with Drift whenever Megatron allowed it and fought to hide the limp as the movement caused pain in old fractures. Rodimus hid it all well enough, even the fact that one optic pupil was blown, the product of a particularly hard blow to his helm from Megatron’s huge fist. 

The young prime stumbled as he fought for equilibrium, bracing a numb hand against the wall as he made his way toward the bridge. It was bad enough that he was already late. Rodimus could already see the disappointed look on Ultra Magnus’ face when the larger bot would count off the minutes that the red mech was late, just like he always did. With that image in mind, he forced his peds to keep moving.

“Roddy!”

The voice of his amica so close to his audial caused the prime to jump and raise his hand to knock Drift away. Rodimus fought to recover his balance as his optics rolled in his helm, trying to focus on the other mech. He pulled his mouth into a confident smile. “Hey, Drift, what’s up?”

The white speedster’s optics were narrowed when Rodimus turned to look at him and the captain quickly looked away. But Drift persisted, reaching toward his friend’s face. “Rodimus, what’s wrong with your-“

Instinctively, Rodimus jerked away and he released a hurried laugh to cover up the obvious flinch. “Nothing!” Rodimus was careful to keep his lips drawn tight, covering the worst of his chipped denta as he smiled. “Just a little too much at Swerve’s. You know how it is.”

The hurt was obvious in Drift’s field. Rodimus hated lying to his amica, but he hated himself even more for being the cause of his friend’s pain. Instead of calling him out, the white mech retreated a few steps to give the other space. “So, you headed to the bridge?” Rodimus nodded. “Cool. I think Magnus wants to talk to you so I won’t keep you.”

The thought of another verbal brow beating caused Rodimus’ already overheating spark to spin faster. He knew, deep down, that he had little control over whether or not Megatron chose to dole out a “lesson” before his shift. But being late, time after time? It took time to cover the worst of the scratches and dents, especially with his hands being numb and with his processor alignment interrupted. 

Ultra Magnus. His second-in-command. He blue mech had to hate him. Magnus had think by then that Rodimus was incompetent, irresponsible-

“Rodimus?”

Rodimus flinched again and blinked at his amica. “I really gotta go, Drift. Magnus is gonna yell, the sooner I get there-“

“Why are you lying to me?”

The question didn’t surprised Rodimus. Why _was _he lying? Well, firstly, Megatron would kill him if he told. Second, the angry ex-warlord might turn his fury on Drift next. Third, Optimus had put Megatron in the position of co-captain alongside Rodimus, whether the younger prime liked it or not. Obviously, Rodimus was meant to learn from the silver mech. Though he had questioned before whether or not Optimus’ actions were even legal, it was far too late for the red speedster to rebel now. He was in too deep, it was too late to save himself. At least by lying he could maybe save his amica and the rest of the crew from Megatron’s wrath.__

__Rodimus allowed his smile to fall and lowered his voice. “I love you, Drift. You know I do right? No matter what?”_ _

__The other speedster moved forward, but stopped his hand from reaching out toward his amica again. “I love you too, Roddy. But why’re you saying it like you’re telling me goodbye?”_ _

__Drift’s voice shook as his question tapered off into the air. It broke the prime’s spark to hear his best friend’s pain and he knew that was all his fault. Rodimus reached out and pulled the white swordmech against himself in a tight embrace. He couldn’t bring himself to admit how weak he was, how he couldn’t even fight the larger mech off when the other forced him to interface. Rodimus couldn’t tell Drift about the fear he’d felt as his co-captain had tortured his mind and his body beyond anything he’d experienced during the war. No, Drift couldn’t know about the things he’d been forced to do, had been made to say._ _

__Rodimus pressed a kiss to his amica’s cheek. “It’ll all be okay, sweetspark. I- I love you, ‘kay?”_ _

__Drift pulled backward and rested his forehelm against the red speedster’s. “I can’t help you if you won’t talk to me and I just- I can’t-“ He paused and lifted his gaze to look directly into Rodimus’ face. The red mech knew that his blown pupil ring was clearly visible when his friend ran his thumb beneath the damaged blue optic. “He’s hurting you, isn’t he?”_ _

__Rodimus caught the black hand in his own, fumbling slightly until he could grasp it and set it away from himself. He could feel the tears brimming and quickly looked away. “I’m already late. No doubt Ultra Magnus will have plenty of yelling to do as it is. I gotta go.”_ _

__“I love you, Rodimus.”_ _

__Before the tears could fall, the young prime darted away and down the hall as fast as his jostled equilibrium would let him go. Drift watched after him, brow furrowed in sorrow and in anger. Neither had noticed the red optics that saw the entire exchange._ _

__~o0o~_ _

__When Rodimus finally stumbled onto the bridge, Ultra Magnus immediately knew that something was terribly wrong. The smaller mech was practically weaving as he made his way toward the captain’s chair and upon, getting closer, Ultra Magnus could tell that it wasn’t drunkenness that plagued his captain. Rodimus was moving like a mech with severe processor damage and perhaps many untended repairs. Ultra Magnus had seen all manner of battle wounds during the war. He certainly could recognize a mech in peril._ _

__When he finally forced away his shock at state of his prime, Ultra Magnus stood to greet Rodimus. The red speedster’s smile was easily recognizable as being fake and his gaze settled about a foot off of his SIC’s face when he spoke. “Well, Mags, you know how I am at Swerve’s! Had a little too much last night, but hey, I made it. Let’s get the lecture over with, I have a shift to run.”_ _

__Ultra Magnus stared. Did this mech really think that he would give him command of a crew in his state? “Rodmius, there is no way in the Pit I’m giving you command in your condition.”_ _

__True fear filled the young prime’s field. “But it was just a few too many-“_ _

__“Back room. Now.”_ _

__Rodimus practically scurried to the meeting room without acknowledging any of the other mech’s that filled the bridge. They’d heard bits and pieces of the exchange, that much was clear. The young prime’s hip slammed into the doorframe as he threw himself into the shelter of the backroom. Why couldn’t he see straight? What had happened?_ _

__He was fighting with himself, trying to recall how he’d hurt himself when a shadow fell over him. Rodimus felt himself cower away from whoever was towering over him and he ended up clipping the wall as he scrambled back and away from the shadow. “I’m sorry, Mags, I was only-“_ _

__“ _Enough _.”___ _

____The stern voice of the bigger mech forced Rodimus’ lines to freeze. “Mags?”_ _ _ _

____Ultra Magnus forced his face into one of soft understanding, an expression he wasn’t used to displaying. “You aren’t in trouble. I just wanted to check on you. You’ve been acting quite strangely as of late.”_ _ _ _

____Confusion flitted across the little prime’s features, but it wasn’t reflected in his field. Running wild, Rodimus’ field showed the terror that the red speedster was trying desperately to hide. “Me? You know me, I’m always acting some way or another! I’ve been moody lately, you know, energon is messing with me-“_ _ _ _

____“Rodimus, what is going on?”_ _ _ _

____The prime opened his mouth to speak, but only a quiet whine came from his vocalizer. Immediately, Rodimus cleared his vocalizer as he blinked rapidly. Why did something have to be going on? “Nothing is going on.”_ _ _ _

____Ultra Magnus sighed and with it came the look of disappointment to the larger mech’s face. Rodimus was strangely comforted by it. Disappointment was familiar, it was constant. The former Enforcer’s face seemed to waver as he spoke. “I would like you to speak to Rung. I cannot make you, but I think it will help with whatever has… distracted you.”_ _ _ _

____Rodimus watched the floor as he listened, trying to pinch feeling back into his fingers. When had they gone numb? And why?_ _ _ _

____“Are you listening to me?”_ _ _ _

____The voice, louder in its annoyance, caused the young prime to step back a little. “Y-yes, I’ll go right now, okay? Right now, sir. I mean, uh, Magnus? Yeah, I’ll go right now.”_ _ _ _

____Ultra Magnus watched the prime struggle, his spark pulsing madly in his chest. Drift had been more than right. Rodimus was fading quickly and it was becoming blindingly obvious that something sinister was happening to the smaller mech. The red speedster was trembling all over and appeared half out of his processor._ _ _ _

____Ultra Magnus forced his field to present itself far more calmly than he felt. “I’ll comm. Rung and tell him to expect you.” Really, he opened a direct comm. to Ratchet to meet the prime and Magnus himself there._ _ _ _

____Rodimus’ helm bobbed quickly. Before he turned to leave, a sober look came over his countenance. “Before I go… you’ve got this here, right?” Not waiting for his SIC to answer, he continued, glaring at the Autobot symbol on the taller mech’s chest. “Of course you do. You’re Ultra Magnus. Always got it together. Get ‘em there, alright?”_ _ _ _

____It was Ultra Magnus’ turn to be confused. “I’m sorry?”_ _ _ _

____“Get them to the knights.” Rodimus smiled and the blue mech saw the little prime’s denta, broken and jagged in his mouth. “If anybot can, it’ll be you.”_ _ _ _

____Before Ultra Magnus could recover from the realization of what he’d seen, Rodimus was gone._ _ _ _

____Staring at the empty doorway, Ultra Magnus sent a comm. to the medic. :Ratchet, we have a situation… It’s Rodimus. Meet me at Rung’s and be prepared for an emergency.:_ _ _ _


	6. Chapter 6

Ultra Magnus gave Rodimus a head start before starting toward Rung’s office. :Rung?:

The calming voice of the little psychiatrist answered almost immediately. :Ultra Magnus! What can I do for you today?:

The blue mech felt his shoulders relax somewhat. Rodimus would be in good hands with Rung, but he needed medical attention first. :Rodimus is headed your way. Ratchet and I will meet you there. I have reason to believe that our captain is being abused.:

The word tasted awful on his glossa as he turned the bridge over to Thunderclash. Ultra Magnus barely paused in his movement toward the exit until he felt a large hand fall onto his arm. The former Enforcer turned back to find Thunderclash’s searching optics trained on him. The colorful mech looked upset and Ultra Magnus could easily guess why. “Sir… what’s wrong with Rodimus?”

The SIC turned to face the other mech. “He is in good hands.”

Thunderclash nodded slightly, obviously unconvinced. “Sir, if there is anything I can do…”

Ultra Magnus clasped the other’s hand in his own. Thunderclash’s one-sided infatuation with the prime was known crew-wide. “Right now, you are needed here. I will handle the situation with Rodimus. I can promise you that.”

Departing form the bridge and Thunderclash, Ultra Magnus reopened his comm. with Rung. :Has he arrived yet?:

:Not yet, sir. You said you believe that he is being abused? By who?:

The blue mech keyed open another door, taking long strides as he went. :I am not at liberty to say who is doing this to our captain, but I have my suspicions. His injuries are notable in their severity and Ratchet will be there to collect him immediately.:

Rung commed back a few kliks later. :Ratchet has arrived, and Drift. Are you certain Rodimus headed to my office?:

:I instructed him to do so.:

A ping from Ratchet sounded in Ultra Magnus’ audial and he accepted the medic’s request into the conversation. :What were his injuries that you could see, Magnus?:

Quickly, the blue mech listed them in a clipped tone as he marched on. :A blown pupil ring in the left optic. Poor balance and coordination. Damage to his denta, severe from what I could see. Older injuries were harder to spot, but he appears to be in constant pain. Multiple fractures, poorly concealed. Also, something with his vocalizer is off.:

:Do you know who did this?: Ratchet’s comm. held none of the medic’s characteristic sass. For once, he sounded genuinely distressed.

:I have reason to believe that Megatron is at fault.:

The comm. fell into absolute silence. Ultra Magnus quickened his pace, ignoring the bots he passed in the halls. Rodimus hadn’t yet arrived at Rung’s so he expected to catch up to the prime at any moment.

How could something like this happen? Who was to blame? Part of the former Enforcer blamed himself for not seeing what was in front of him. The reality of Rodimus’ situation began to settle in as Magnus continued his way toward the others. 

The prime was being severely mistreated by a bot that Optimus Prime himself had placed on the ship. What Optimus had done was far out of his realm of power, that much Ultra Magnus concluded. The other prime had no right to place a co-captain beside Rodimus. It was Rodimus’ ship, his crew. Yet no one had tried to stand up for the red speedster when Megatron was practically forced upon him to intrude upon his command.

Not only was Megatron placed in the perfect position to deal out such abuse, he was Rodimus’ intended one. They were expected to share quarters, to share meals, everything. Who knew how long Rodimus had endured the treatment? How long had he hidden the injuries? Why didn’t he get help?

Those thoughts raced in circles through Ultra Magnus’ processor as he turned down the hallway toward Rung’s office. No matter what had happened before, the blue mech promised himself that he wouldn’t allow the abuse of the young prime to continue. If Megatron was proven to be the culprit, Magnus himself would ensure that the ex-Warlord never saw the light of day again as long as he functioned.

Ultra Magnus rounded the corner leading into Rung’s office. He had expected to find Rodimus there, but was instead met with three expectant pairs of optics. Drift, Ratchet and Rung all stared back at the tall SIC, gazes flicking about him until Drift spoke. “Where’s Rodimus?”

“He hasn’t arrived yet?”

~o0o~

He’d been so close.

Rodimus had been able to see the door to Rung’s office, the door that would lead him to salvation from all of the hurt he’d suffered. He had made it halfway down the hall when it had happened.

A hand had come out of nowhere, crushing his throat cables before he could cry out. Within a blink, Rodimus felt himself being dragged into the darkness of a closet, one of the many that were scattered amongst the ship’s numerous hallways. He’d fought weakly at first; having been so close to his freedom gave him some strength.   
But a single swat to his helm had his processor spinning.

“I saw you with him, Rodimus.”

Saw him with who? He’d been on the bridge! Everyone was there!

Megatron caught Rodimus’ smaller hand in his own and squeezed. The smaller prime screamed as his hand was easily crushed in the other mech’s fist, reducing his digits and delicate knuckle components into scrap metal. The silver mech smiled as tears began to run down Rodimus’ face. “You kissed him. You’re a sorry liar, little prime.”

A sharp slap caused Rodimus’ helm to jack-knife to the right and he saw stars. He fought to pull himself together enough before he understood what Megatron meant. 

_Drift. _He’d seen Rodimus kiss his amica’s cheek.__

___Oh no. _He and Drift were amicas, bonded together. But Megatron wouldn’t see it that way, he never had believed that amicas were all that they were.__ _ _

____“It wasn’t like that-“_ _ _ _

____Rodimus’ words were choked off as a black hand gripped his throat cables, hard enough to impeded the lines that lead to his processor. The red speedster saw spots dance across his vision and lifted his still functional hand to claw at his constricted neck. Megatron leaned forward again. “And late again? I’m quite surprised that anyone calls you a ‘captain,’ Rodimus. You can’t even show up to your shifts on time.”_ _ _ _

____It hadn’t been his fault. Rodimus had spent most of the hour before his shift trying to cover the worst of the paint transfers and old, half-healed injuries. He couldn’t risk them seeing, couldn’t have them approaching and asking questions._ _ _ _

____But the prime didn’t say any of that as he was slowly strangled in the silver mech’s grasp. He kicked weakly and felt more than saw when his already damaged optic cracked from the pressure on his throat cables._ _ _ _

____He sensed movement with his still functioning optic as Megatron drew back his other unoccupied hand._ _ _ _

____Rodimus knew too late that he shouldn’t have tried to duck._ _ _ _


	7. Chapter 7

Another blow crumpled his left helm chevron, catching Rodimus off guard. The grip on his neck loosened enough that the prime was left to slide down the wall at his back. Cowering lower against the wall, Rodimus was still unable to escape the blows that descended upon himself as he tried to reason with the bigger mech. He coughed harshly, trying to clear his lines as he spoke. “Megs, listen, I was-“

But Megatron wouldn’t listen. He never gave the young prime a chance to explain his actions. “My name is _Megatron _and you will call me such!”__

__The silver giant brought his fist down against Rodimus’ chest and the smaller of the two felt his actual spark jolt in his chassis. He’d barely recovered from the hit when his helm slammed against the wall behind him. The flame-emblazoned mech tasted energon as Megatron’s swift uppercut clamped Rodimus’ denta down on his own glossa._ _

__Unable to stand under the assault, Rodimus fell to his knees as he spat out more chips of his ruined denta. It was all a big misunderstanding. If Megatron would give him a chance- “Megatron, please, just-“_ _

__“NO! You are a pathetic, insolent-“_ _

__Every word was punctuated with either a slap or a punch. Everything spun before the smaller mech’s optics and he was becoming less and less aware of the pain as it wore on. The insults continued as well, but it was only a little while before he couldn’t understand the words being screamed at him._ _

__Hazy red optics, bright with hateful anger, wavered in front if him. A field pummeled Rodimus’ own, driving it down like the weight of an ocean rested on top of him. The speedster’s vision began to rapidly tunnel._ _

__Large hands, large enough to wrap fully around his wrists, latched onto his shoulders and yanked him harshly until Rodimus was forced back into reality. Instinctively, he tried to cover his face. His small gold hands were batted harshly away and the prime barely had time to react before fingers once again closed around his throat and he was hoisted upward._ _

__The voice, almost his subconscious by that point, whispered harshly in his audial as those fingers squeezed. “You’re disgusting. Promiscuous, a pitiful excuse for a prime. No wonder Optimus sent me to help your sorry-“_ _

__The closet door gave way with a loud crash._ _

__Rodimus couldn’t see who had entered, but the voice that followed confirmed who had arrived._ _

__“MEGATRON!”_ _

__Rodimus was hardly aware as his neck was released. He managed to drag in a shallow gasp of much needed air before it was forced out again as his battered body hit the floor. The red mech curled inward on himself, trying in vain to protect his frame from further injury. A ped connected with his chest plate and his managed a weak yelp. Another ped met the side of his face, but the power behind it seemed to be thwarted. As if something had reduced the force behind the blow._ _

__Dizzily, Rodimus heard the voice from before again. “MEGATRON, DISSIST! YOU ARE UNDER ARREST-“_ _

__“RELEASE ME YOU-“_ _

__A dull thud reached Rodimus’ audials, and distantly he registered it as the floor beneath his cheek shook with the heavy weight of body falling. A loud, angry screech echoed around the small room and Rodimus flinched as he pressed further into the floor. He prayed to anyone who could be listening that it was Megatron’s body hitting the floor and not Ultra Magnus._ _

__When something touched his damaged, aching spoiler, the speedster released a thin wail. “Please! Please, I didn’t mean- _I can’t _-“___ _

____The hand on his spoiler immediately retracted, replaced by a soothing deep voice. “Hush now, Captain. I have to get you to the medbay.”_ _ _ _

____“But- he- Meg-“_ _ _ _

____The hands returned, impossibly careful as they moved to lift Rodimus’ broken body. “He cannot harm you further. Stay awake for me, Rodimus-“_ _ _ _

____Everything was spinning again, spiraling into darkness. The young prime panicked, lashing out as he struggled in his rescuer’s arms. He didn’t want to die, he wasn’t ready to go to the Pit. “Can’t- no-“_ _ _ _

____Another voice, so soft, reached Rodimus’ aching processor. “Roddy, you gotta calm down, babe. Mags knocked him out cold. We won’t let him hurt you ever again.”_ _ _ _

_____Drift _. “Don’t let him- Drift-“__ _ _ _ _

______Rodimus reached for the voice, blindly swiping with his ruined hand. A sob sounded from nearby and lips pressed against what was left of his golden fingertips. “Mags and I have you, sweetspark. Just hang on til we get-”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Magnus we need to move.” Ratchet’s even voice came from nearby and Rodimus felt careful, skilled hands navigating his ruined chassis. Tears smeared the prime’s face as the medic quickly ran diagnostics. Vaguely, he was aware that he was being carried in arms far larger than his own and that the owner of those arms was running at a dead sprint._ _ _ _ _ _

______Lights flashed overhead and Rodimus turned his face into the warm chest of the mech carrying him. His broken armor made everything feel so cold as the air rushing through the cracks met with the energon spilled from his torn lines. Rodimus could almost feel the vibrations of the bigger mech’s spark as the medic running beside them continued working on what he could. “My scans show massive processor damage, ripped lines, blown optic fuse- oh no.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The medic struggled to keep his peds moving as he made the new discovery. Drift, who had just closed a comm. instructing Thunderclash to have Megatron collected, looked over at his conjunx. The white speedster’s optics were bright, his field colored with violent anger. “What? What did you find, Ratch?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Ratchet spared him a quick glance and Drift was treated to a glimpse of true fear on the medic’s face. “His spark casing- it’s-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______A grunt from Ultra Magnus dragged the attention of both mech’s back to the blue mech’s cargo. A dagger of horror passed through them both._ _ _ _ _ _

______Ultra Magnus was struggling to hold onto a seizing Rodimus. Energon bubbled from the young prime’s mouth and his good optic had rolled back into his helm. His limbs twitched spasmodically. Sparks of electricity encircled Rodimus’ helm, creating a halo of blue crackling light. Drift watched with horrified fascination as his amica released a high frequency cry and his body tensed with charge._ _ _ _ _ _

______Ratchet, with precision that only a forged medic could muster, produced a syringe from his subspace and jammed the needle into Rodimus’ neck lines. The wet croaks coming from the prime immediately stopped and his remaining optic faded into darkness. Ultra Magnus was partly scared and partly grateful when the red speedster’s flailing arms and legs relaxed in his arms. “What was that?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The medic continued checking his diagnostic lines and their connections with Rodimus’ medical port on his wrist as he spoke. “A seizure caused by processor damage. Gave him an anesthetic agent. I need him to move as little as possible.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Ratchet opened a comm. to the medbay and Drift reached over Ultra Magnus’ arm to brush his hand across Rodimus heavily dented helm. The flame-emblazoned mech’s face had fallen slack. Energon still trickled from his mouth, the corners of his optics, even from beneath his audial flares. Drift forced down another wave of tears at the sight of his beloved amica, so broken and damaged. How did he not see what was happening earlier?_ _ _ _ _ _

______They arrived at the medbay only for Ratchet to block Drift’s path. “I can’t have you in there.” When the speedster opened his mouth to argue, Ratchet pressed a single finger to his conjunx’s lips. “You don’t need to see this. I’ll update you soon.” The medic’s field brushed against Drift’s, a substitute for a hug that the medic wouldn’t publicly offer._ _ _ _ _ _

______Drift nodded and stepped back as Ultra Magnus lay the limp captain in Ratchet’s arms. The medic pushed through the medbay doors, calling for First Aid as he went. His cargo didn’t react as the other medic appeared and wordlessly began prepping the young prime for surgery._ _ _ _ _ _

______Ratchet moved forward at a constant pace toward the table as First Aid continued hooking up a transfusion to Rodimus’ medical port. “Primus, Ratchet, what happened to him?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The older medic looked down at the young prime and shook his helm. He should’ve listened to Drift, should’ve watched the ex-warlord more carefully. Without looking up at his former subordinate, Ratchet hurried to stabilize Rodimus weak sparkpulse. The spark casing itself was cracked down the center, the result of severe blunt force trauma. It was a miracle, in Ratchet’s opinion, that Rodimus hadn’t immediately offlined permanently._ _ _ _ _ _

______The retired CMO’s voice shook with sorrow as he spoke. “Something preventable.”_ _ _ _ _ _


	8. Chapter 8

Ultra Magnus had never seen the little prime so still.

Rodimus lay silent and still on the medberth, hooked to a number of machines designed to keep him unconscious, out of pain, and in recovery. The speedster’s injuries covered his entire frame and ranged in both age and severity. Ratchet had even found evidence of a shifted and improperly healed spinal fracture in Rodimus’ lower back. The CMO had gone pale talking about the injury and wouldn’t disclose how such an injury could occur. Ultra Magnus, as he stared down at the much smaller mech, could very well guess what would cause such a spinal injury.

Ultra Magnus had volunteered to keep watch over the captain whenever he wasn’t on his shift at the bridge. With Megatron laying sedated in the brig and Rodimus recovering, that left the blue mech as the standing captain for the time being. As such, not much changed for Magnus rather than his title. He simply wrote reports instead of correcting the ones written by Rodimus.

Folding his hands, Ultra Magnus relaxed his usually ramrod straight back and rested his chin on his fingers. He had ordered that Rodimus have someone with him around the clock, fearing that somebot who sympathized with Megatron would come to finish the silver mech’s job. When Magnus was on the bridge, Drift was by his amica’s side. If he wasn’t available, Ratchet stayed nearby, sometimes moving his paperwork into Rodimus’ room where he could closely monitor the red mech.

When Ratchet had decided to keep the prime in stasis, Drift had been deeply upset by the decision. The swordsmech had nearly broken into tears at the sight of Rodimus when the medics had finally finished repairing what they could. The young prime had been wrapped in a mess of weld-on patches, wires and heated blankets. A tube had been placed down the red speedster’s throat, acting as a hollow splint for the crushed cables there. Though Rodimus, like most Cybertronians, didn’t need his mouth for breathing unless he was overheated, Ratchet feared that the severe scarring on the mech’s neck would block his vocalizer unless they intervened with the tube. 

Perhaps the worst of the numerous wires and wrappings centered around Rodimus’ face and helm. Ratchet and First Aid had been forced to open his helm and had even called upon Chromedome to run a few tests. Upon completion of his tests, Chromedome had confirmed that damage had been done to Rodimus’ memory stores. The mnemosurgeon also assured them that the damage was only temporary and that a long rest on Rodimus’ part could restore his processor to full and healthy functioning.

Other injuries analyzed and treated by Ratchet and First Aid were kept quiet and were only discussed with Ultra Magnus, Drift and Rung. The slight framed psychiatrist, upon overseeing the removal of Megatron from the closet, arrived at the medbay. He’d frozen breifly at the sight of Rodimus’ battered frame before the orange mech had adjusted his glasses and taken a seat across from Ultra Magnus.

During the rush to save Rodimus life, the medics had discovered that most of the injuries were older but still painful. Rodimus’ crumpled hand was dealt with easily enough until Ratchet found the non-functional sensors within them. Such a thing would’ve left no feeling in the prime’s hands from the mid-forearm and downward. Further inspection revealed similar trauma in Rodimus’ peds, his intake, his spoiler and even his valve. Diagnostics showed severe scarring in all of those places, leading the medics to believe that the abuse had been ongoing for some time. The persistent numbness of the sensors was the result of the young speedster constantly turning down his sensitively, likely in an attempt to make the pain more bearable. Coupled with the loosened wiring that the medics found, likely the result of the violent beatings the prime had endured, Rodimus couldn’t have felt much at all sensory-wise.

The blue mech reached forward and covered one of those small golden hands with his own. Ultra Magnus knew that the prime was in a deep, medically-induced recharge and couldn’t feel his touch, but it helped calm the former Enforcer all the same. Across the berth from him, Rung lifted his attention from the datapad in his lap. He took one look at Magnus’ hand over Rodimus’ and smiled softly. “You’ve cared about him for some time, yes?”

Rung’s intuition shouldn’t have surprised the SIC. He didn’t look up and almost moved his hand away from the red mech’s. “What happened to him occurred under my supervision. I take responsibility for it.”

The little orange mech chuckled quietly, but his face and field bore no mirth. “I think you know it runs more deeply than that, Ultra Magnus.”

Again, the larger mech refused to meet the other’s optics. Ultra Magnus had already decided that his feelings for the prime were inappropriate and that he would never have the chance to act upon them. At one time, he’d believed that Rodimus was happy with the ex-warlord, even after he began to stumble and flinch around others. Ultra Magnus had talked himself out of pursuing the handsome speedster and was unwilling to allow his efforts to go to waste. However, when he opened his mouth to deny the psychiatrist again, a different sentiment left his vocalizer. “A relationship with my captain and prime would be highly inappropriate.”

Despite the former Enforcer’s confession, Rung didn’t appear smug or pleased to have dragged the answer from the blue mech. Instead, he seemed perplexed. “I am sworn to confidentiality, as you know.”

Ultra Magnus looked across at the spectacled mech. “Yes, I know.”

With a sigh, Rung set aside his datapad and leaned forward. “That being said, I believe it would be wise to reconsider your decision to distance yourself from him.”

“Oh?”

“What you may see as a breach of protocol may be what helps Rodimus through this traumatic experience when he wakes.” At Ultra Magnus’ look of confusion, Rung continued. “He is fond of you and has been for some time. Becoming his friend may aid in his recovery more quickly than if you distanced yourself. In fact, staying away from him may cause more damage than he has already suffered.”

Rung’s revelation nearly stalled Magnus’ processor. Were they talking about the same mech? Rodimus couldn’t possibly like him by any means. He would most definitely know if the prime harbored anything for him rather than repulsion. Besides, all the blue mech did was correct the other and chastise him when he felt that Rodimus needed it.

Rung shook his head and Ultra Magnus realized that he’d spoken all of his doubts aloud. “Exactly, sir. He likes you because you actually help him. You don’t hurt him intentionally and yet you somehow manage to push him in the right direction. You don’t scare him or threaten him or try to overpower him or try to undermine his authority. Ultra Magnus, you _see him _. And he knows you do. He knows you respect him even when he makes mistakes and you’ll help him even when you don’t necessarily agree with his choices. Does he not always ask for your opinion before he jumps? Being who he is, he couldn’t make it more clear than if he wrote it on Swerve’s banner.”__

__Ultra Magnus found himself to be stunned anew by the small mech across form him. He’d never heard the psychiatrist speak so much or so quickly in all the time that he’d known him. The blue mech had also known nothing about Rodimus’ feelings toward him. Ultra Magnus, after all, was a mech of truth and the evidence used to back it. And Rung had given him evidence, hadn’t he?_ _

__The door to Rodimus private room beeped and Ultra Magnus jumped, ready to defend against whoever came through the door. The sound of Drift’s steady cadence finally got the former Enforcer to relax somewhat. The white speedster moved into the room, optics already fixed on his amica on the berth. “How is he? Any change?”_ _

__Both Ultra Magnus and Rung replied in the negative and Drift’s hopeful face fell. The white speedster’s depressed field nearly made Ultra Magnus reach to comfort Drift, but Rung beat him to it. “No worries, Drift. You know Ratchet wants to keep him under until his nanites complete more repairs. He’s doing fine.”_ _

__Drift opened his mouth to speak, but his optics caught sight of Ultra Magnus’ hand. The blue mech’s optic’s widened and he pulled his hand away from the prime’s quickly upon following Drift’s gaze. Ultra Magnus awkwardly cleared his throat. “Did anything of consequence occur on the bridge?”_ _

__The white mech startled at the sound of the SIC’s voice and he grinned slightly. Ultra Magnus felt a blush pulse in his cheeks. “Nothing to report, sir. Quiet out there.”_ _

__Abruptly, Ultra Magnus stood to leave. His shift wouldn’t begin for awhile yet, but he had something he had to do. “I’ll be taking my leave then. Rung, Drift,” he nodded to them each in turn before nearly bolting form the room._ _

__What Ultra Magnus hadn’t noticed in his rush to leave was the way that Rodimus’ fingers had moved to lightly grasp the former Enforcer’s hand in return._ _


	9. Chapter 9

As Ultra Magnus made his way down to the brig, he reviewed what he would say to the ex-warlord. He had no intention of allowing the other mech to affect him and he determined that he would remain professional. The SIC of the Lost Light could not allow his emotions concerning the situation to cloud his judgement.

Thunderclash sidestepped out of the former Enforcer’s way as the tall blue mech arrived at the brig. “Ultra Magnus, sir.”

The worry was clear in the colorful bot’s field. Ultra Magnus couldn’t help but study the other mech momentarily before he answered the unasked question. “He is still in stasis, but stable.”

Thunderclash would be a good match for Rodimus. The mech was renowned for his heroics during the war and many other deeds he’d done for his fellow Autobots. There was even a rumor that the one time Matrix holder helped Ratchet himself pass his medical exams. Thunderclash was the perfect coupling of intelligence and kindness, the mech that everybot wanted to be close to and involved with. Well, everybot except Rodimus himself.

The red-opticed Autobot flashed a genuine smile at his higher ranking officer before his field roiled with fresh hostility. His gaze cut to the door that led back into the cellblock. “I’m glad to hear it, sir. Rodimus deserves far better.”

Ultra Magnus nodded briefly, distracted by the memory of Rodimus’ ire when it came to the brightly painted mech. A flicker of something like satisfaction wormed its way into his processor and he struck it down as quickly as he felt it. “I am determined that no further harm should come to our captain.”

His pointed identification of Rodimus being the captain was not lost on Thunderclash. The other mech gave him a grim smile as he opened the door to the brig and returned to stand watch beside it. “I too am dedicated to the future safety and wellbeing of our captain, sir.”

Keeping his mouth taut, Ultra Magnus nodded in acknowledgement as he stepped inside.

The brig was empty save for the last cell on the right. As he’d been busy with watching over Rodimus and running the ship, Ultra Magnus had been unable to write anyone up for public intoxication at Swerve’s. Chastising himself and setting a reminder to visit the establishment, the blue mech came to a stop in front of the cell that he sought.

The silver mech sat primly on the berth, facing outward from the cell. The dim tint of his red optics told Ultra Magnus that Megatron hadn’t recharged well for some time. Stasis cuffs had been secured onto his wrists at the mech’s first sign of waking. Now, those large black hands rested before himself, clenched into fists where they lay. The side of Megatron’s helm, despite having the protective helmet in place, was heavily dented and likely sore from where Ultra Magnus’ had swung and rendered the ex-warlord senseless. 

The former Enforcer felt no sympathy at all for the mech.

Megatron’s vision brightened at the sight of the other mech outside of his cell. “Ultra Magnus.”

The blue mech remained motionless as he locked his hands together behind himself. He kept his field locked down tight against his plating, determined that Megatron wouldn’t feel how tumultuous with emotion it was. “Sir.”

Ultra Magnus’ refusal to acknowledge his designation seemed to have no effect on the cuffed mech. He rolled his massive shoulders and the former Enforcer was reminded anew of how small Rodimus was compared to the mech in the cell. Megatron had been a gladiator and no amount of Fool’s energon could hide away the raw strength that he naturally possessed. The thought of the gladiator tearing into the smaller mech-

“How is your precious prime?”

Ultra Magnus forced his voice to leave his vocalizer evenly. “He is very well and will recover fully from his injuries.” 

Truly, it was unknown whether or not Rodimus would ever be the same. Ratchet and First Aid weren’t sure if the young prime was even going to wake when they took him off of the machines. Despite the possibility that his captain may never wake up, the SIC was determined that he wouldn’t give Megatron the satisfaction of knowing just how bad Rodimus’ condition was.

The ex-warlord chuckled low in his chest. “Don’t lie to me, Magnus. I lived in the company of the best liars for millennia. I know that the little prime may never wake up.”

The former Enforcer managed to wrestle his facial plates into a neutral expression. “You underestimate Rodimus Prime.”

“Do I? You and I both know what he truly is, don’t we?”

Ultra Magnus felt his optical ridge twitch. He would not give Megatron the satisfaction of his anger. “You must be more specific.”

Megatron stood, swinging easily to his peds with the grace of a true predator. “We have both spoken about Rodimus’ inability to lead and his continued sparkling-worthy behavior.”

“It is true that Rodimus has made less than perfect decisions. Despite this, our captain has always done what he thought was best for his crew. Unlike some, Rodimus’ intentions are pure and without regard for his own happiness or safety.”

The jab caused nothing more than a slight narrowing of the ex-warlord’s optics. “Good will does not make a good leader. You know that leadership requires the respect of his followers, something that that pathetic excuse for a captain lacks. They see him for what he is: a figurehead placed in command of this ship for the purpose of nothing other than to keep him out of everyone else’s way.”

Ultra Magnus leaned forward until he could pointedly look down on the mech within the cell. “That sounds more to be an explanation for why you are here, Megatron.”

“You have said yourself that you wondered over Optimus decision concerning the captaincy of this ship.”

“Indeed I did. Your promotion was quite worthy of questioning when Optimus made it.”

Megatron’s field lashed out for a only a klik and Ultra Magnus felt the fury, cold and strong, that raged beneath the other mech’s plating. Usually, the former Enforcer was not petty enough to count victories. But considering who the mech before him was, he would take wat he could get.

The blue mech did not suppress his smile as he pulled a datapad from his subspace. “You will be tried for the assault and attempted murder of your captain, Rodimus Prime. Your past actions prior to your last trial shall hold no sway in your sentencing or decisions pertaining to it. You will be tried before a jury of your peers. You will-“ 

Magnus’ comm. pinged him and he felt the ex-warlord’s attention on him as he listened carefully. A moment later, Ultra Magnus resubspaced the datapad before he proceeded to turn his back dismissively on the former Decepticon leader.

Megatron called after him as he made his way to the brig’s exit. “Do you intend to finish briefing me on my trial?” 

Ultra Magnus paused at the door. “I intend to do so at a later time. As for right now, I must go to the medbay.” The blue mech couldn’t resist taunting the silver mech as he slid the door open. Thunderclash peered around the corner and Ultra Magnus spoke to him, loudly enough for the ex-warlord to hear. “Rodimus is coming out of stasis.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I needed me some sassy UM ;)


	10. Chapter 10

Terror was the first thing he felt.

Rodimus’ field filled the room the instant that his processor readjusted and rose out of the haze of stasis. Drift was jolted out of his reverie by the sudden onslaught of emotions that permeated the room. The white speedster leaned over his amica and ran his thumb across Rodimus’ cheek. Quickly, Drift sent out a comm. to Ultra Magnus and Rung. “Hey Roddy? Ratchet! He’s comin’ online-“

A piercing yell broke form the prime on the medberth as his optics flew open, brilliant blue against his near color-void features. Immediately, Rodimus began to thrash violently. His movements disconnected several wires and his hands immediately went to his face where he began trying to tear the tube out of his intake.

Drift hated to use force, but knew that Rodimus would injure himself further if he didn’t act quickly. Taking each of the golden hands in his own, the swordsmech used his weight to pin the red speedster down onto the berth. “Roddy, listen! You gotta stay still-“

A dull croak came from the twisting mech beneath him. “- ‘iiiift-“

Rodimus’ blank look eventually cleared enough to fix on Drift’s face. The white mech smiled down as he petted his amica’s helm. “Shhh, babe, don’t fight the tube. You’re alright. Ratchet’s comin’ now, just stay still.”

Tears welled in the corners of Rodimus’ optics and Drift gently wiped them away. A beep sounded, signaling that the door to the captain’s private room had been triggered open. Moments later, Ratchet appeared at the medberth’s side and immediately began plugging into Rodimus’ diagnostic ports, cursing all the while. Drift continued to deliver light caresses to the other mech’s face as the medic quickly uploaded a series of dampeners and inhibitors into the young prime’s overtaxed systems.

Rodimus slowly fluttered back into a sleepy haze and Ratchet sat back when the red speedster finally stopped fighting the tube and the wraps. “Quick thinking, holding him down. I’m sure it scared him, but moving too much right now would set him back in his recovery.”

Drift released his grip on the drowsy mech on the berth. Rodimus’ attention, though sluggish, followed him as his amica sat down on the edge of the metal slab. Drift was careful to stay in his line of sight and the white mech allowed his field to curl protectively over his amica. “Ratch, tell me he’s gonna be okay.”

“Drift…”

“Please just say he will. Just say it.”

The medic sighed through his vents and Ratchet reached out to drag his hand across one of Drift’s prominent finials. Immediately, the white speedster began to calm down. “He’ll be alright.”

Drift released a harsh breath and took one of Rodimus’ hands between his own. He leaned down to breath over the newly repaired fingertips of his best friend. The white speedster was still praying quietly over the golden hand when a knock sounded at the door. Ratchet triggered the keycode and Ultra Magnus stepped in a klik later. 

The newly arrived mech took in Drift’s bowed form and the tight look on the medic’s face. Rodimus lay motionless on the medberth, slack and unmoving. He was too still, his field undetectable as Ultra Magnus stepped closer. “I received a comm….”

The blue mech moved forward again, closer to the prime. Rodimus’ body was pale and his usually flamboyant colors were muted with illness and the evidence of hurriedly applied welds. Ultra Magnus couldn’t bring himself to come any closer and the heaviness within his spark was evident when he whispered. “I came straight here upon receiving your comm. Did I misunderstand your message?”

Drift looked up to find Ultra Magnus staring at Rodimus with deep sadness on his face. It took the spiritualist only three kliks to understand what the blue mech thought he was seeing. “No, no! He did come round, Mags, but he panicked right away ‘cause of the tube and welds. He was disoriented pretty bad. Ratchet gave him a heavy dampener, that’s all.”

Though Ultra Magnus’ features didn’t change at all, relief flooded his field as he moved around the Rodimus’ other side. As if the recovering mech were made of glass, the blue mech moved to cradle the young prime’s free hand in his own. It was so small and bright in his matte blue palms, like a star laying in the pillow of a scuffed up sky. 

A flick of one of those fingers forced Ultra Magnus’ gaze to move from the hand that lay in his own to the face of the smaller hand’s owner. Though Rodimus’ optics were hazy with the medical programing that clouded his systems, his optics were steadily trained on the former Enforcer. Upon finding himself the object of the young prime’s attention, Magnus looked away and down at the golden hand again.

From across the medberth, Drift smiled at the SIC’s flushed cheeks and darting optics. Ratchet lay a hand on his conjunx’s shoulder and squeezed as another knock came from the doorframe. 

Both mechs looked to find Rung quietly observing from the open door. The little psychiatrist was watching Ultra Magnus as the larger mech offered Rodimus a tentative, underused smile. After observing for few moments longer, Rung looked to the medic and the swordmech, a gleam visible behind his glasses. “How is our captain?”

Rodimus lips twitched around the tube and he blinked lethargically. A field, weak but tangible, moved out to brush lazily at Ultra Magnus’ own. The blue mech answered with his own stronger field as he allowed it to pulse comforting waves against the prime’s plating. 

Ratchet watched a few kliks longer. His voice was low and soft so as to not disturb the mechs before them. “It won’t be easy. But he’s strong, that much is obvious. He’ll need all the help he can get.”

The room drifted into comfortable silence around them and eventually Rung took his leave. Ratchet soon followed, claiming that he had paperwork to do. As they sat together alone with the speedster laying between them, Ultra Magnus and Drift said nothing to each other at first.

The SIC stroked the smaller hand with his thumb, occasionally clearing his vocalizer as he struggled to find something to say. He hadn’t been prepared to show so much affection to the young prime so quickly. But his arrival into the room had shaken him deeply when he’d seen Rodimus so still, so lifeless. The belief that his captain had passed away and the following relief to find that he hadn’t… Ultra Magnus found himself to be far more effected by it all than he’d ever been about anything else. The former Enforcer vented deeply as he tried to calm his racing spark. The hand in his own twitched again and Magnus held onto it all the more tightly.

“Ratchet said he’d be okay.”

Ultra Magnus jumped and turned to regard the mech across from him. Drift also held onto a golden hand as he massaged his amica’s palm. The blue mech managed to keep his voice steady as he returned to watching Rodimus’ face. The prime was still looking at him, but appeared to be losing the battle against a well-needed recharge. “I was present when he said so.”

Drift shifted, optics never meeting the bigger mech’s. “I know you were.”

Silence fell over them and Ultra Magnus had almost managed to doze off when the TIC spoke again. “He likes you. A lot.”

The blue mech quickly looked up to find that the prime had fallen into a deep recharge. Unable to think of something to say, Ultra Magnus settled with saying nothing at all. He swallowed around the lump in his throat and thought again of Thunderclash, the mech Rodimus had mockingly called “the greatest Autobot of all time.” Even in his sarcasm, the young prime’s description was rather accurate. Thunderclash was a good mech, somebot who was fiercely protective of those that he cared about. 

Though he himself was protective, Ultra Magnus recognized his worth as an enforcer of the law. He was not a good choice for a potential mate. The blue mech understood his flaws and his persistent inability to “loosen up” as some put it. Rodimus was vulnerable in the state he was in and likely wanted protection and safety from those around him. Perhaps, the SIC reasoned, that was why he supposedly liked Ultra Magnus. It was likely, in the former Enforcer’s optics, that Rodimus was interested in nothing more than the larger mech’s ability to protect him from further harm.

Though the final analysis hurt, Magnus found that he didn’t mind. The blue mech considered himself lucky to be anything at all to the beautiful speedster and he surprised himself by deciding that he would be satisfied in any capacity that Rodimus accepted him in.

Drift moved to stand. Ultra Magnus watched him with confusion before checking his HUD and seeing that it was time for the speedster’s shift. Drift gave his amica one last look before considering Magnus. “You’ll comm. me if he wakes up again, right?”

The blue mech nodded solemnly, still fighting with himself internally. The other mech departed soon after but not without ogling Rodimus’ hand, still entangled with Ultra Magnus’, one final time. After he’d gone, the former Duly Appointed Enforcer of the Tyrest Accord bent his helm and lifted those sun-colored fingers to his lips in a chaste kiss.


	11. Chapter 11

“HE DID _WHAT?! _”__

__The high pitched screech echoed around the lab and Wheeljack cringed over his latest project. When Rattrap’s words finally sank in, the scientist abandoned his work to slowly turn around. It couldn’t be true._ _

__Before he could even get a word out, Starscream had taken a breath and was yelling again. “To a _prime? _” Wheeljack watched as the jet stalked toward the brown mech. “Who is your source? How did you come by this information? If this is some kind of rumor-“___ _

____“One close to Optimus Prime! He received word of the situation from Ultra Magnus yestercycle!”_ _ _ _

____The seeker spun on his heel and began to pace rapidly. “How could they let this happen! I knew he couldn’t be trusted-“_ _ _ _

____Windblade, who’d stayed silent in the doorway until then, spoke up. “How is the captain?”_ _ _ _

____Rattrap clasped his hands in front of himself and even Starscream halted his mad pacing to hear what he was about to say. “They say that Ultra Magnus interrupted before Megs could kill him, but it doesn’t look good. I guess Magnus clocked Megs into stasis!”_ _ _ _

____Starscream’s optics were ablaze, bright red with fury. “Isn’t Rodimus Prime his intended?! And his superior? How could this happen? What was that fool Optimus _thinking?! _”___ _ _ _

______Windblade lifted a hand to cover her mouth and Wheeljack sucked in a breath, but Rattrap didn’t miss a beat. “He said that the poor mech’s throat was nearly torn to bits before the big blue could get there and stop it all. Even ol’ Ratchet had trouble getting Rodimus’ neck back together from the pieces it was in-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wheeljack had known Rodimus back when he was called Hot Rod during the war. They’d both been with the Wreckers back then. Imagining the usually vibrant, excitable mech in the grip of someone like Megatron-_ _ _ _ _ _

______Rattrap looked disturbingly pleased with himself as he continued delivering what he’d found. “They’re saying he may never come out of stasis.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Windblade’s voice piped up then, a little fearful. “Who might not?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Rodimus. It sounds like Megs got him pretty bad and he was put into medical stasis-”_ _ _ _ _ _

______A strangled sound caught the scientist’s attention and he turned in time to see Starscream bent slightly at the waist. One talon-tipped hand was pressed against his belly and the backside of the other was held over his intake as the jet fought to breath._ _ _ _ _ _

______Acting quickly, Wheeljack shot a comm. to Windblade as he moved toward the upset seeker. Understanding immediately, the Camien snagged the still babbling Rattrap and dragged him out the door._ _ _ _ _ _

______Wheeljack slowly approached the hyperventilating Starscream, palms facing outward. “Shh, Star. Just breath.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Don’t tell me what to do!”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The ex-Wrecker rolled his optics with exasperation even as he projected fondness through his field. “Come ‘ere.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Starscream, wings quivering violently, buried his face in his mate’s neck and allowed Wheeljack to wrap him in a warm embrace. Ever since they’d shared the seeker’s last heat cycle, the scientist had been treated to the other mech’s more vulnerable side. Though he’d never admit it, Starscream enjoyed his scientist’s easy, free-of-judgement affections._ _ _ _ _ _

______Wheeljack petted at the tensed wings as he whispered into the seeker’s audial. “Megatron will see justice-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______“He did it again- he did it to someone else-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______The crackling in Starscream’s vocalizer could only be heard when he was upset, a constant reminder of what he had survived at the hands of the vicious warlord. Wheeljack rested his chin on top of his mate’s helm. “I know. But this is not wartime and Rodimus is not in the Decepticon camp. Megatron cannot escape his crimes this time or ever again.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wheeljack continued to give the jet’s body soothing strokes and pats as he felt Starscream begin to calm. He dipped his head and retracted his battle mask to gently kiss at the old scars marring his lover’s neck cables. The seeker shivered against him. “Rodimus is strong, just like you are. If I know Hot Rod, he’ll be up and after Megatron himself in no time. Just like I know you would.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“I did go after him. Repeatedly.” Starscream snorted. “I understand you fought together during the war. How are you…?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Wheeljack sighed against the other mech’s shoulder. “I’m upset about it, but there ain’t a thing I can do for ‘im here.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Optimus Prime should’ve exterminated that monster when he had the chance.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______With a sad smile, the scientist shrugged. “It was a preventable tragedy. The best thing to do now is hope that he has friends on that ship who can support him. Who can help him heal.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“If he wakes up.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Th ex-Wrecker looked away, brow furrowed. “He will.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Starscream nuzzled against Wheeljack’s helm fin before he pulled back to look at his mate. “Always optimistic, aren’t you?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“One of us has to be.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Stupid Autobot.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The scientist pulled his seeker back into a tight embrace for a firm kiss. “Love you too, Star.”_ _ _ _ _ _


	12. Chapter 12

Ultra Magnus held the young prime’s hand as Ratchet carefully removed the tube from Rodimus throat. As the medic carefully extracted the hollow splint from the smaller mech’s intake, the former Enforcer felt the golden hand in his own squeeze tightly. Rodimus, still under the influence of heavy dampeners, had emerged from recharge late in the previous cycle when Ultra Magnus had been on the bridge. Upon receiving word of the red mech’s awakening, the SIC had given the bridge over to Thunderclash at the end of his shift and quickly made his way down to the medbay.

Drift had reluctantly turned over watch of the captain to the blue mech, unable to watch as Ratchet went about his poking and prodding of Rodimus still sore frame. Even Ultra Magnus found himself squeamish when the tube was removed from Rodimus intake with an audible popping noise. As the red speedster went to speak, the medic pressed a fingertip against his mouth. “No talking for now. Give your cables a chance to get stronger.”

As Ratchet began checking a weld on Rodimus mid-torso, the young prime turned bright optics on his visitor. Again, before he could open his mouth, Magnus quirked an optical ridge at him. “No talking. You heard him.”

Rodimus lips twisted in a pout. But the prime’s displeased expression was quickly replaced with a gasp of pain as the ex-CMO pressed a nanite-leaden syringe between two plates of red armor. The needle slipped neatly through and into the protoform beneath. The flame-emblazoned mech gulped shallow breathes until the medic had compressed the plunger fully, emptying the nanites straight into one of the direct lines. Ratchet paused after pulling away the needle. “Forgot you were afraid of needles.”

A shrill whine pierced Ultra Magnus’ audials and he suppressed the urge to cover them. It took him a moment to locate the source of the noise.

Rodimus’ optics were wide as his hands flew to his throat. He looked back and forth between Ratchet and Ultra Magnus and tried to speak again, only to have the same painful screech erupt from his vocalizer. Panic shot through the young prime’s field and tears jumped into his optics as he tried desperately to form words.   
“If you don’t stop right now, I’ll put you back into stasis! I said it needs rest and so does the rest of you, so sit down!”

At the medic’s chastising, Rodimus sank back onto the medberth, optics still huge and searching. He’d begun to pant through his intake, rapidly enough that a sharp wheezing sound could be heard with each exvent. Ultra Magnus sent a quick comm. to Drift as he leaned forward into the prime’s line of sight. “Captain. Look at me-“

Another broken sound escaped Rodimus as the red mech began to try and get up, shoving Ratchet aside as he swung his peds over the side. Before the obviously irate ambulance could let loose on the wayward captain, Ultra Magnus physically put himself in front of the speedster. “Rodimus Prime, _look at me _.”__

__At the sound of his designation, Rodimus finally looked up at his SIC. Tears streaked the smaller mech’s face and he shook violently as he sat upright on the edge of the medberth. Ultra Magnus surprised himself when he reached forward to grasp the prime’s upper arm. “You must calm yourself. Ratchet believes that rest will help your vocalizer to recover. I suggest you listen to his council.”_ _

__Ratchet watched with barely concealed awe as the usually headstrong speedster slowly shifted back to lay once more on the medberth. Rodimus’ focus never left Ultra Magnus for a single klik as the medic quickly readjusted the wires and lines connected to his limbs and torso. The blue mech was equally attentive to the red mech and barely noticed when Drift practically burst into the small room. “What happened? What’s wrong with him?”_ _

__As Ratchet calmed his newly arrived mate, Ultra Magnus slipped his hand back into Rodimus’. Within moments of doing so, the blue mech discovered the quick flutters of the red speedster’s fingers against his palm. It took a few more movements of the digits before the former Enforcer realized with no small amount of elation that the prime was signing to him with half-formed sentences._ _

__< -stay. No go->_ _

__“I’m not going anywhere right now.”_ _

__Rodimus optical ridge pulled down slightly as he continued to speak broken hand into the larger mech’s palm._ _

__The young prime frowned and Ultra Magnus couldn’t help but find the look endearing. “You know I have shifts on the bridge. I am the standing captain until you are well.”_ _

__Fear jolted through Rodimus’ field and another keen sounded from his vocalizer. His fingers tapped so quickly that the blue mech barely understood what he was signing._ _

__“He cannot hurt you anymore.”_ _

__Ratchet and Drift watched quietly, taken back by the seemingly one-sided conversation between the pair. They watched as Rodimus used chirolinguistics, his face furrowed in a mix of concentration and worry as he tried to communicate. Ultra Magnus answered aloud, aware that Rodimus’ hand speaking abilities were limited._ _

__

__Ultra Magnus sent his field out to wrap around Rodimus in the equivalent of a physical embrace. “I won’t allow it.”_ _

__

__“Yes, but Drift will be here.”_ _

__

__Despite the feeling of happiness that flashed briefly through his spark, the ever responsible side of Ultra Magnus won out. “Do not be childish in this, Rodimus.”_ _

__Immediately, Rodimus cast his gaze down and Ultra Magnus knew that he’d misspoken. The red speedster’s field retreated until it was pulled tight against his plating, but Ultra Magnus could still detect the barest traces of it. What he found was the last thing he expected and it was certainly the furthest thing from true._ _

___Shame. Guilt. ____ _

____“You are not a problem, Rodimus. This was not your fault.”_ _ _ _

____The young prime pulled back slightly, withdrawing further into himself as he cast a nervous glance at his amica and the medic nearby. It was clear that the comforting words had done little to ease Rodimus’ worry. Something about that fact settled deep into Ultra Magnus’ spark and he decided to save it for later contemplation. The blue mech cursed inwardly for his hasty reprimand of the already insecure and distressed prime._ _ _ _

____He kept his hold on the captain’s hand as the red mech tried once more to move away. But when Rodimus’ field lit with nervous discomfort, Ultra Magnus reluctantly released those golden fingers and watched them retreat to lay limply on Rodimus’ own lap. The former Enforcer watched attentively, searching for some kind of explanation as the prime pulled into himself and closed weary optics._ _ _ _

____A motion from Ratchet caught his attention and Ultra Magnus followed the other two mech’s from the room. A last look at the recovering mech revealed that Rodimus had fallen into a fitful recharge. He couldn’t help but notice the glinting wetness that still marred the little prime’s cheeks._ _ _ _

____Ratchet triggered the door closed behind them. “The damage to his vocalizer will take time to heal. Physically, he’ll be tearing up the hallways in no time.” The medic dragged a hand down his face and Ultra Magnus detected the slight tremble in Ratchet’s fingers. “The worst of his injuries are emotional and I’m afraid that only time can repair those.”_ _ _ _

____Drift played with the hilt of one of his swords, mindlessly piddling with nervous fingers. His voice was deadly quiet and his field was flat. “When is the trial?”_ _ _ _

____Ratchet rested hand on the swordsmech’s shoulder. “Drift-“_ _ _ _

____“He will pay for this, I swear it. I’ll see him straight into the smelting Pit. I- I-“_ _ _ _

____Ultra Magnus forced himself to look away as the white mech fell against his mate’s broad chest. The sight of the fearsome warrior crying for his amica was nearly enough to break Ultra Magnus’ carefully constructed outer appearance. Though he was sure to keep himself silent, the SIC also knew that he would personally escort Megatron to the scaffold when the time came._ _ _ _


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all I don't know how amica bonds work so I'm sorryyyyy.

Rodimus struggled to stand, supported by his amica on one side and his SIC on the other. Hurriedly, he tamped down the embarrassment that rose into his field as he teetered weakly in their grip. He’d spent most of the last several cycles in recharge thanks to the medic that stood before him. Ratchet, after the young prime’s attempts to get up and talk, had applied enough sensory dampeners to submerge Rodimus into a peaceful, lazy state.

“Slow down before you injure yourself.”

Rodimus couldn’t help but flinch at Ultra Magnus’ unwavering, stern voice. The prime wobbled and shuddered at the processor ache that was beginning to emerge behind his optics. “Yeah, I got it. Just trying to see straight, is all.”

He didn’t miss the careful consideration in the larger mech’s gaze as Ultra Magnus moved to support him around his waist. Despite the humiliation at needing help to stand, Rodimus still felt a bolt of excitement at the closeness of the former Enforcer. Just as his cheeks began to grow warm, Ratchet began his spiel. “You’re on bed rest until I clear you for duty. That means no racing, visiting Swerve’s, taking the bridge, OR-“ The medic cast a look at Ultra Magnus. “Writing reports. I don’t want any strain on your sensors, struts or anything you’re usually straining. You’re to relax and stay in berth.”

Drift coughed to hide a laugh as Rodimus turned beseeching optics on him. “Don’t look at me. Doctor’s orders.”

“He’s your conjunx. Can’t you just…”

Rodimus’ amica smiled gently at him. “Nah, it’ll be more fun making you listen to him. Besides, I go home with him, not you!”  
Ratchet observed the two friends silently before turning an exasperated look on Ultra Magnus. He was surprised to find that the former Enforcer didn’t look annoyed at all by the antics of the two speedsters. Instead, the blue mech was regarding the prime he supported with barely concealed… something. 

Before the medic could puzzle over Ultra Magnus further, Rodimus’ field dipped dramatically. A haunted look came into his optics even as a watery smile gracing his lips. “Where is he?”

They all knew who he was talking about. When no one answered, the prime squirmed uncomfortably on his medberth. “It was just a misunderstanding, not his fault. He saw me, uhm. He, uh-“

Rodimus choked as he tried to clear his newly repaired vocalizer. He turned to Drift. “He saw me kiss you in the hallway. When I said I loved you.”

The white speedster stared for a moment before releasing a pitiful noise. “You mean… He did that to you because of me?”

Horror filled Rodimus’ field anew and Ratchet shifted slightly. He didn’t like sedating the upset prime, but the red mech’s body needed time to heal. Unfortunately, Rodimus caught the medic’s movement and flinched away. “Don’t! I’m good, okay? I’ll be good; no more needles or drugs, please-“

Ratchet returned to his former stance as the distressed red mech turned back to Drift. “It wasn’t your fault, it was mine. I shouldn’t have done that and I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to push him or you or anything.”

Drift’s mouth was agape with shock. The white speedster didn’t know what to say to his amica as the other mech hung his helm in despair. Part of him was troubled that Rodimus would feel unwelcome when it came showing his best friend affection and that the prime, as a result, felt the need to apologize. Drift also couldn’t believe that Megatron would punish his amica for exhibiting the healthy closeness that an amica bond required.

Though his was less visible, Ratchet stared at the red speedster as Rodimus appeared to withdraw into himself. If Rodimus’ hadn’t bonded with Drift for some time, it was no surprise that the captain’s spark casing had cracked with a single blow from Megatron’s fist. Coupled with the constant attacks, Rodimus had likely been denied regular bonding with his amica. Ratchet couldn’t help but wonder once more how it was that the little prime had managed to survive for so long in secret.

While the other two observing mechs remained stunned in speechless silence, Ultra Magnus felt his anger beginning to boil to the surface. Anyone with the privilege of having an amica endura knew that displays of love and closeness were necessary in strengthening the bond between the mechs or femmes involved. To neglect the bond would cause undue stress to the amicas’ sparks.

Angered by the prime’s admitting of his own apparent guilt, Ultra Magnus somehow managed to keep his voice soft. “Rodimus, you must understand that none of this occurred because of something that you did. Megatron will be punished in accordance with his actions.”

Before the red mech could argue, Ratchet shook off the worst of his disbelief and came toward Rodimus again with his hands visible. “You’re abstention of bonding.  
How long has it been since you did?”

The prime looked down as Drift answered quietly. “Since they became intended.”

Ratchet cursed violently and Rodimus flinched. Calming himself, the medic sighed heavily before he began to direct the other two mechs to move the young prime back to the berth. “I’ll need to run more tests on your spark, especially since you haven’t renewed your bond recently. Your spark is healing nicely, but I’m afraid of pushing with an amica bond right now.”

Rodimus gave a hollow laugh and Drift jumped at the sound. “I don’t need to, really. I’m sure everything is okay anyway and you guys have things to do so if I could just go back to my hab, we can move on with this.”

Ultra Magnus barely concealed a snarl. The silver mech had completely convinced Rodimus that his needs were null if they at all impeded the convenience of others. “Drift has also gone without bonding. He is no doubt feeling the strain that your spark has endured thus far as well.”

The young prime looked at his amica who nodded in affirmation. “You- do you hurt, Drift?”

The swordsmech shifted his peds as he went about adjusting a heated blanket over the flame-emblazoned mech’s chassis. “It’s uncomfortable, but it doesn’t hurt too bad. I just wish you’d told me why you didn’t want to bond anymore.” Drift picked at a loosened threads absently. “I thought you just wanted more time with Megatron. Or that maybe I was being too pushy, or something.”

Rodimus’ settled back with a thud, shaking a little from the exertion of standing upright. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel that way- I-“

“Stop apologizing, Roddy.”

“Drift, I didn’t mean to hurt you or anyone and that’s what I did. It’s all I do.”

Ratchet slammed one of his tools down on the table, making the others present jump. “Isn’t it clear that you were the one getting hurt? Can’t you see that he was manipulating you? Breaking you? _Killing _you?”__

__The young prime’s face screwed up slightly as the angry ex-CMO abruptly left the room, calling gruffly to First Aid as he went. Drift gave his amica a helm pat as he followed after Ratchet. “He’s not mad at you, okay? It’s what happened-”_ _

__Rodimus watched his best friend leave to find his conjunx with sad optics and sank further back in his armor. He hadn’t meant to cause so much trouble. It had all been so simple when he’d not said anything, back when he had been the only focus of Megatron’s wrath. But now…_ _

__“Ratchet said you must calm yourself. Otherwise, he may decide to medicate you so that you may heal.”_ _

__Somehow, Rodimus had forgotten the large blue mech that still sat beside his berth. Ultra Magnus’ field tingled at the edge of his, a comforting salve that smoothed across the rawness of the red mech’s own field. Despite his size, the former Enforcer was purposely trying to make himself less intimidating, even as his deep voice still vibrated through Rodimus’ plating. “It is no fault of your own, my prime. His actions are his own and shall be paid for by him alone. You meant no one any harm by not speaking earlier.”_ _

__The captain blinked rapidly, taken back by his SIC’s sentiments. Before he could stop himself, Rodimus reached out to grasp one of Ultra Magnus’ hands. “I’ll try my best to be a better captain, Mags. I promise you.”_ _

__With no small amount of satisfaction, the prime spotted the annoyed expression on the blue mech’s face at the overused nickname. “My only hope at this time, Rodimus, is for you to rest and regain your strength.”_ _

__First Aid knocked lightly before entering the room then, pushing a cart before himself. The young prime cringed at the sight of several needles, all of various lengths and circumferences. He turned beseeching optics on Ultra Magnus. “Stay?”_ _

__Without checking his chronometer as the prime expected him to do, Ultra Magnus closed his hand around the smaller mech’s. “Of course.”_ _


	14. Chapter 14

“Are you certain you want me present for such a procedure?”

Ultra Magnus prepared to send a comm. to Drift and request his presence back in the room, but Rodimus’ voice didn’t shake when he reaffirmed his decision. “Yeah, I want you here. I don’t want Drift to see the damage. He’s upset enough as it is.”

The bigger mech nodded to First Aid who looked down at his charge. “Can you open your chest for me?”

The prime triggered his chest plates open and Ultra Magnus barely suppressed a gasp of awe at the sight.

Rodimus’ spark casing was cracked down the center, the result of a single blow from Megatron’s fist. The thin, intricately-shaped metal was warped and broken; it was the reason that the spark’s light could be seen at all. Ultra Magnus watched the spark itself shiver as First Aid reached for one of the needles on the tray. “This won’t hurt at all, Rodimus. Just relax and let me get it over with for you.” The red mech swallowed convulsively and nodded before closing his optics and taking the SIC’s hand in a death grip.

Ultra Magnus kept ahold of the young prime’s hand as First Aid began the tests. The new CMO was quick and efficient, wasting no time as he tested the spark chamber’s integrity. He carefully went about suturing the worst of the casing’s jagged edges closed, hiding the spark back inside as he did. A few delicate welds, administered precisely with the help of the needles, held the casing edges together and would allow Rodimus’ natural repair nanites to do the rest.

The whole time, the young prime kept his optics focused on the ceiling and didn’t move the slightest bit. At one point, First Aid murmured a curse as one of the needles caught on an exposed edge. Rodimus simply bit his lip through the pain, showing notable control when he didn’t recoil at the burning sensation. As First Aid repositioned the needle and started the suture weld again, Ultra Magnus whispered in low tones to his captain. “Easy. It’ll be over soon.”

By the time First Aid requested that Rodimus close his chest plates, the prime was covered in a glimmering layer of moisture. He was panting heavily through his mouth and declined when the CMO offered him an oral dampener, shaking his helm quickly with wide optics. Realizing the state of his patient, First Aid manually closed the plates and went about writing up a report based on the notes he’d taken during the procedure. “Once those welds solidify and your repair systems kick in, I suggest that you refresh your bond with your amica as soon as you feel well enough. Your spark suffered significant trauma and some of the more severe damage is older and healed incorrectly. Merging with Drift would help heal and strengthen your spark significantly. However,” the medic shifted forward from where he sat on the edge of the berth, fixing his optics on Rodimus fully. “I want you to talk to Rung above all else. He will be able to help you process what has happened and find healthy ways to move forward.”

Before First Aid had even finished his first sentence, Rodimus was shaking his head. “No, I don’t want to talk to him. I’m not something that needs fixed or whatever. I’m cool, I’ll be fine.”

“Rodimus.” The young prime looked away as Ultra Magnus spoke. “It would be greatly beneficial for you to speak to him.”

“You can’t make me go!”

The blue mech resisted the urge to chastise the mech before him and instead rubbed his thumb soothingly against the back of Rodimus’ hand. “We cannot make you do anything and would not force you even if we could. It must be something you choose voluntarily to do in order for it to be helpful.”

First Aid barely concealed his shock at the warmth in Ultra Magnus optics as he spoke to the mech on the berth. Rodimus actually appeared to be listening to the former Enforcer, attention trained solely on the other mech. Even though the young prime still refused to go in the end, First Aid noted that Rodimus at least agreed to consider meeting with the ship’s psychiatrist.

 

~o0o~

 

“Why do you feel that you are responsible then, Rodimus?”

The mech in question settled further down in the chair, as if trying to hide from the question. With Ultra Magnus and Drift’s encouragement, the young prime had caved and agreed to pay Rung a single visit. Even though he’d only agreed to go once, the two mechs had praised him for his bravery in going at all. Though Rodimus thought the excitement was ridiculous and unnecessary, he still enjoyed the way Drift coddled him on the way to Rung’s office.

“Rodimus?”

He shook his helm as he tried to remember Rung’s original question. “Uh, because I was?”

The little orange mech across from his blinked behind his glasses. “Did someone tell you that it was your fault?”

“Yeah.”

Rung quirked one of his trademark eyebrows. “Megatron, perhaps?”

Rodimus nodded, still refusing to look directly at the other mech. “He fixed my mistakes when I made them. Told me how I could do things differently the next time. He taught me how to be better.”

“What did he do to make you better?”

“He punished me when I made mistakes.”

“What did he do to punish you?” Rung watched as the other mech retreated into himself slightly at the question. “You do not have to answer if it makes you uncomfortable.”

Rodimus visibly fought with himself, twisting harshly at his fingers as he whispered. “Mostly it was, um- you know, hitting. Most often it was what Mags and you guys walked in on, but not as bad. Sometimes- when he was more angry with me- if I did something that embarrassed him or defied him- I-“

The young prime struggled and ended up putting a hand over his own mouth as a sob welled deep in his chassis. Rung produced a soft cloth from one of his several compartments and extended it to the red mech. Gratefully, Rodimus took it with a dry laugh. “I’m sorry, Rung.”

The orange bot gave him a sad smile. “You have no reason to be sorry, Rodimus. It is healthy to talk about what happened to you so that you may process it better.”

The prime sniffed and decided it was better to rush than drag it out. Maybe then it wouldn’t be so hard to admit. “He was rough when we interfaced. Forceful. It always hurt, every time. He, um- I think he liked it like that. When I cried during.”

Rung voice had dropped to a whisper when he spoke. “Do Ratchet and First Aid know about this?”

“I- I don’t know. Probably. They repaired my sensors so I bet they figured it out.” 

The psychiatrist watched in silence as the younger bot continued, picking at the paint on his own hand. “Megatron was good at keeping me on task that way though. I knew what to expect if I failed and- and I thought that it would help everyone else if I had someone to help me get my act together. He made sure I was better for everyone.”

Rung resisted the urge to reach forward and stop Rodimus from peeling the paint off of one of his golden fingertips. “Perhaps that was how he wanted you to see the situation. Rodimus, you know that Megatron’s actions against you were not appropriate, correct? You understand that no one should ever treat you that way?”

The prime couldn’t stop himself, even when he knew it was the wrong answer to give. “I deserved it though.”

“Why do you think that?”

Rodimus’ thought back to every life that had been lost under his watch. He thought of Nyon, his home, burning, everyone screaming-

A tear rolled down his cheek and he didn’t bother to dash it away. “I didn’t save them. I couldn’t help them or protect them and it was my job. I don’t deserve this ship, my friends-” The red mech continued even when he started to tremble and static crept into his vocalizer. “Sometimes, I wish he’d finished it the first time. Back before the Matrix saved me. I wish he’d just done it and it was all over with.”

Rung sat stunned into silence as the mech before him slumped and hid his face in his hands. He wasn’t sure what he could say to save Rodimus Prime from the agony that the young bot’s spark suffered from. “Do you want to die, Rodimus?”

Immediately, the prime looked up and directly at him. “No! No, I don’t. I’m not crazy, for frag’s sake. I just wish- I wish I’d made better choices for everyone. Maybe he wouldn’t have been so disappointed in me, you know? Maybe it would’ve been different if I weren’t so- so-“

“I know that you aren’t crazy, Rodimus. It is important for you to remember that it was not your fault at any point. You made mistakes, yes. Everyone does. But no one deserves to be abused by a loved one, no matter the excuse.” 

The little psychiatrist jotted down more notes on his datapad before looking up at the captain before him. “I understand that you did not want to speak with me at first. I will not push you, but I would like to meet with you again soon. Would that be alright?”

Rodimus gave a non-committal shrug and refused to meet the other mech’s gaze. Rung shot a private comm. to Drift who appeared in the doorway moments later as if he’d been waiting outside the whole time. Watching the slow, tentative movements of the young prime, Rung knew that it would take time and patience for their captain to regain what he’d lost.


	15. Chapter 15

“Captain?”

Rodimus was abruptly jolted out of his reverie by the voice of Ultra Magnus. From his medberth, he turned his helm to find the large mech ducking under the doorframe, finials barely clearing it as Ultra Magnus entered. The young prime forced down the happiness that he felt at the sight of the former Enforcer as he pushed himself to sit more upright against his pillows. “Hey, Magnus, what’s up?”

Ultra Magnus immediately hesitated, something that Rodimus wasn’t used to seeing in the much bigger bot. “I simply wanted to check in on you. To see how you are doing.”

It had been three shifts since Rodimus was cleared by First Aid to bond with Drift. The CMO had cleared the room for the pair in order to give them privacy while First Aid himself monitored the young prime’s spark from outside the room. Rodimus had been unable to relax, even though Drift was his amica and meant him no harm. Even with Drift’s spark bared before him and the swordsmech’s field a sweet blanket wrapped around him, Rodimus had panicked and been unable to renew the amica bond.

The look on Drift’s face when Rodimus had shied away flashed through the red mech’s mind. The hurt had been obvious in his amica’s field but even more tangible was the discomfort that emanated from Drift’s end of the bond. It was obvious that Drift was in pain as a result of the neglect, but, ever the patient mech, Drift said nothing as he closed his chest plates. The former Decepticon had comforted his distressed amica, telling him that it was okay if he didn’t want to bond and that it was fine to wait. But Rodimus knew better. He was endangering the health of the most important bot in his entire lifecycle.

The SIC settled himself in the small chair that sat by Rodimus’ medberth. He wasted no time in addressing the latest issue regarding Rodimus’ recovery. “I have been notified of your inability to comfortably bond with Drift.”

Rodimus felt himself blush at the direct approach to the subject. “Yeah. I talked to Rung about it and he said to give it time. But I know it’s hurting Drift…”

Ultra Magnus murmured in agreement and watched as the captain’s shoulders slumped further. “I understand that he is likely feeling the strain. But Drift also understands that what you have experienced would make such closeness difficult.”

Rodimus nodded. Ultra Magnus followed the prime’s gaze and spotted the chipped paint on the once golden palm of the other mech’s hand. He watched as Rodimus nervously went about picking the paint, letting the flakes fall on the covers. Without thinking, Magnus reached forward and put his own hand lightly over the bare metal of his captain’s palm. The red mech jerked at the contact. “Huh?”

“Why do you do that to yourself?”

Rodimus licked his dry lips, stalling. “I- I don’t know.”

Ultra Magnus moved to cradle the smaller hand between his own blue ones. “Does it hurt when you do it?”

“Yeah, a little.” The flame-emblazoned mech pursed his lips briefly. “I’m sorry-“

The blue mech studied the dark gray metal of Rodimus’ armor, usually hidden by the flamboyant paint job. “It pains me that you would hurt yourself, my prime.”

Rodimus looked up at the larger mech in disbelief. Why should he care? 

Ultra Magnus’ optics were gentle and his voice soothing as he spoke. “I would rather you hurt me than yourself, Rodimus.”

The red mech laughed, a little breathless. “Why would I ever hurt you, Mags?”

“I know you would never do so on purpose. But I would rather feel the pain than let you experience it alone. If you must hurt someone, let it be me rather than yourself.”

“I… I could never hurt you, Magnus.”

“I know and so I ask that you extend to yourself the same curtesy.”

Rodimus couldn’t think of a thing to say at first. Magnus cared about whether or not he got hurt. He shouldn’t have been surprised really. Drift had told him the story during an earlier visit, detailing how the former Enforcer had crumpled the side of Megatron’s helm and then scooped Rodimus up in his arms before making a mad dash for the medbay. Even while he’d been told about such actions, Rodimus still had trouble believing that anyone could care for him at all. But the young captain knew now (thanks to his visits to Rung’s office) that his deeply ingrained insecurities likely played a role in his doubts. 

But Ultra Magnus? Offering himself in place of the prime hurting himself? What more proof did Rodimus need?

Without bothering to ask for permission, the captain leant forward and embraced the startled SIC to himself. Being much smaller, he was barely able to get his arms around the other’s neck. After a moment of staying stock still, Ultra Magnus returned the hug as he held the smaller mech against his chest. The captain released a rough purr as he buried his face against Ultra Magnus’ thick neck cables. “Thanks, Mags.”

“You are welcome, Rodimus.”

When they finally broke apart, the former Enforcer could feel the contentedness in the young prime’s field. Even the smile on Rodimus’ face was no longer as forced and held a genuine quality to it. Ultra Magnus allowed himself a small quirk of his lip plates as he looked down at the mech on the medberth. 

His original reason for visiting Rodimus soon came to the forefront of his processor. “I came to speak to you concerning the crew, sir. They want to know how you are faring.”

The thought of the crew forced a flicker of nervous energy back into Rodimus’ field. “So they know what happened, huh?”

Ultra Magnus nodded solemnly. “Yes. They have been told just enough to be informed as to why one of their captains is hospitalized and the other is locked in the brig.”

Rodimus cringed. So the crew knew how pathetic he was. The young prime took a steadying breath. “I don’t know if I can face them.”

The blue mech seemed to understand and rested his hand on the red mech’s once more. “I would not ask you to see them in your condition right now. I only ask your permission to select some to act as jury for Megatron’s trial. Those selected must be given all details concerning Megatron’s treatment of you.” Ultra Magnus paused. “This includes those injured discovered by First Aid and Ratchet.”

Rodimus played with Magnus fingers before interlacing them with his own. “They’ll know what he did to me.”

Fear crept into the smaller mech’s field and Ultra Magnus extended his own to sooth it away. “I know it is not easy. But you must remember that none of it was your fault and that your crew knows that. They will not judge you or see you as weak. Perhaps through this they will recognize your strength.”

The young prime sniffed and stared down at their clasped hands. “Sure, you can do that, I guess. I can’t put it off forever.”

Ultra Magnus’ brow creased as he sensed his captain’s pain. Rodimus had suffered terribly at the hands of someone that he thought cared for him. The blue mech gave the hand in his own a light squeeze and allowed his field to envelope the little prime in warm energy. “You will have your friends with you for the entirety of the ordeal, I promise you that. Would you prefer to not be present at the trial itself?”

“That’s- I can do that?”

The former Enforcer nodded. “Ratchet has offered to provide medical documentation of your injuries to the jury that I select. Due to the events that occurred between you and Megatron, Rung has suggested that your presence not be required.”

Rodimus considered for a moment. “But wouldn’t not showing up make it look like I was scared or guilty or something?”

Ultra Magnus couldn’t stop the incredulous chuckle from leaving his vocalizer. At the prime’s look of dismay, he hurriedly explained. “Not at all. You needn’t worry about such things, Rodimus. It is clear who is at fault and who is on trial. Though it is completely at you whether or not you go, Rung simply suggests that you don’t based on his expertise as a mental health professional.”

“What do you think I should do?”

The former Enforcer regarded his captain, taking in the red mech before him. The young prime was brave to even consider facing his abuser. To think that Rodimus would ask for his council on such a thing shook Ultra Magnus to his core. “I think that the decision is solely yours to make.”

The captain inclined his helm and took a breath through his vents. “I’ll try to go then. Maybe then I can start getting it all behind me if I can see him face to face.”  
Ultra Magnus nodded. “Then we will be with you all the way.”


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The trial does not go well. At all.

Ultra Magnus hand-chose the mecha and femmes that he would consider for Megatron’s trial. Ever the rule follower, he balanced the jury with an equal number of Decepticons and Autobots, six of each to make a jury of twelve total. Among the most notable that had passed his interviewing processes were Cyclonus, Rewind, Perceptor, and Nightbeat, all four of whom had immediately volunteered. Cyclonus’ willingness to participate was a surprise at first until the blue SIC saw Tailgate virtually lecturing the quiet mech about his ‘duty to justice’ in the middle of the hallway.

The mechs that would be serving as witnesses were more than willing to offer their testimony for the jury. Rung, Ratchet and First Aid would provide their witness accounts with the addition of medical expertise. Chromedome, who had provided an early analysis of Rodimus’ processor state, would also introduce his findings. Drift also volunteered as a witness as well, having been there when they’d found Megatron and Rodimus in the closet. 

Despite being an eyewitness to the events, Ultra Magnus was the only mech available for the position of judge. He was the second-in-command and was the most qualified to handle the position as he understood law better than any other bot on the ship. Even though Magnus was close to the situation, he could be relied upon to deliver justice in accordance with the jury’s decision when the time came.

Thunderclash, ever the Rodimus fan, volunteered to be the captain’s escort and bodyguard during the proceedings. . Ultra Magnus knew that Rodimus was in good hands when the red-opticed Autobot guided the still recovering prime into the makeshift court room in his hoverchair. True to character, the red mech was chaffing under Thunderclash’s fawning.

Rodimus’ gaze scanned the room until he found Ultra Magnus perched up behind a makeshift podium. The former Enforcer nodded to him and the smaller mech returned the gesture, visibly swallowing. Across the room, Rung caught sight of the prime’s arrival, doing a double take before fixing his gaze on Ratchet and worriedly shaking his head. The former CMO looked even more stiff than usual, ticking his sensitive fingertips against the table before himself. Drift sat stock still nearby, never moving from his conjunx’s side as he watched the jurors arrive and take their seats.

Then, Megatron was brought in.

The tall silver mech was escorted by Trailbreaker, still intimidating with his black hands in stasis cuffs. The sharp red optics easily found and settled on Rodimus where the captain sat beside First Aid. To his credit, the young prime didn’t even flinch, holding the ex-warlord’s gaze until Megatron reached his seat and sat down.  
Out the corner of his vision, Ultra Mganus watched as Drift’s hands dug into his chair as the swordsmech forced himself to stay still.

Even as Ultra Magnus began proceedings and began to call witnesses, the silver mech continued to stare at his victim, watching the younger mech with unwavering attention. Even when Thunderclash whispered to distract the smaller mech, Rodimus didn’t look away from the ex-warlord, his face still and blank. Ultra Magnus, seeing that no harm was being done, continued to watch over the proceedings as Rung, Ratchet and First Aid related their findings to the jury.

When Drift stood to give his eyewitness account, Rodimus physically jerked in his seat. In the time it took for Ultra Magnus to turn and look directly at him, the young prime was back to staring at Megatron as if he hadn’t moved at all. But now the former Enforcer could feel the red mech’s field, swirling chaotically throughout the room, unchecked.

A single look at the prime’s face had Ultra Magnus calling out. “Thunderclash, I believe our captain has seen enough of the proceedings. If you will escort him back to his berth and remain with him until given further instruction?”

With a nod, Thunderclash began backing out of the room, pulling Rodimus’ chair along as he went. All the while, the red mech stared at Megatron as if he weren’t being moved at all, his optics wide and glassy. Rodimus’ mouth was open slightly as well and moved with unheard words. Megatron smirked when the door finally closed to block the prime from view.

It was at that moment that the intense gaze of the former Decepticon leader rose to meet Ultra Magnus. Before he could look away, the former Enforcer was treated to the last thing he expected to happen. It was something that should not have been possible, not if jobs had been done thoroughly.

:You are quite the protective mech, Magnus. You must be proud of yourself.:

Ultra Magnus stared at Megatron with growing horror as the ex-warlord continued to speak directly through his comm. and into the blue mech’s head. :So determined to keep your little prime safe. But it would seem that you may have overlooked something important when arresting me…:

Megatron gave a death’s head grin to those around him, all of whom had watched Ultra Magnus’ growing distress with confusion. The ex-warlord started an open comm. then, projecting directly into every processor within the room. But even as he spoke, he never took his optics off of Magnus.

:You left my comm. on. And what an audial-full your dear captain has just received.:

Even Cyclonus’ and Ratchet’s optics blew wide at the realization they all faced. For a moment no one moved. The next, Drift was over his table and halfway to the ex-warlord before anyone could react. His denta were bared as he launched himself at his former leader, fangs glinting in a vicious snarl. Just before the feral-looking swordsmech could sink said fangs into Megatron’s throat, Ratchet appeared at his side and began to drag his conjunx backwards. The two mech’s tumbled to the floor in a tangle.

Drift was screaming from the medic’s arms, thrashing as he tried to get away. “What did you say to him?! What have you done?!”

Ultra Magnus’ bellowed orders over the chaos that the room had dissolved into. “ _ORDER! _”__

__The room fell into relative silence once more as Ultra Magnus towered above them all, optics ablaze with blue fire. “The jury will retire and review the evidence. Once finished, they will deliver their decision to me. Until that time, Megatron will be escorted back to his cell. First Aid, if you will.”_ _

__Quick to obey, Trailbreaker shoved the ex-warlord toward the door, aided by Nightbeat. The smile never once left Megatron’s face as he was restrained and First Aid approached. With no hint of care, the medic forcibly tore the ex-warlord’s comm. system from the side of his helm. Cords snapped and sparks flew as the paneling was pulled away and the device was removed from its docking near Megatron’s processor._ _

__Upon seeing that Megatron was well on his way to being taken care of, Ultra Magnus bolted past Ratchet and Drift. He caught a brief glimpse of Drift’s face as he went and paused when he saw a look similar to Rodimus’ plastered on the white speedster’s features. Ratchet was patting at his conjunx’s cheeks, trying to get Drift’s attention. The swordsmech whispered “no, no, no” in an endless litany. Ultra Magnus looked back in time to catch Megatron’s optic again. By the satisfied look on his face, the former Enforcer knew that the silver mech had been speaking to Drift too._ _

__Leaving the distraught TIC in the care of his conjunx, Ultra Magnus wasted not a klik more before speeding down the hallway in search of Rodimus Prime._ _


	17. Chapter 17

He heard the terrified screaming first.

Without a moment’s hesitation, Ultra Magnus burst through the doors and into the medbay. Following the source of the sound, he strode past the other medberths to the back where the captain’s private room was and opened the door. The sight that greeted him made his spark drop within his chassis.

Though Rodimus had no love for Thunderclash, he’d never been scared of the other mech. Now, the colorful Autbot had his hands up with palms out, trying desperately to corral the wailing prime. The red speedster screamed again, trying to dodge Thunderclash’s calming motions as the smaller of the two backed further into a corner of the room. Tools clattered to the floor as the prime weakly tried to stand, but, in his fear, found himself unable to do so. “Don’t touch me! Don’t touch-“

“Rodimus!”

The prime’s optics were glazed when he spotted Ultra Magnus. All the same, the red mech stopped moving when he saw the former Enforcer, hands still raised in defense. Sensing the change, Thunderclash moved aside so that Rodimus could see the blue mech more clearly. The smaller mech looked an absolute mess, stuttering and begging pathetically as he watched Ultra Magnus move closer.

“Shh, Rodimus, it’s me. Magnus. May I come closer?”

A jerky nod later and the former Enforcer was creeping forward, careful not to spook the collapsed speedster. When he was within arm’s length, Magnus spoke again, so soft that he doubted Thunderclash could hear him. “May I touch you?”

The young mech shook his helm in the negative and Ultra Magnus retracted his hand. Rodimus pulled his legs up to his chest, his spoiler bent awkwardly against the wall. “D-Drift? Don’t touch me-”

“I won’t. Drift will be here soon. Until then, how can I help you?”

Rodimus cowered away from the larger mech, making himself small as he tried burrowing deeper into the corner. The sight of the once proud captain so distressed caused another wave of anger and sympathy to flood Ultra Magnus’ spark. “Rodimus, what did he say to you?”

“H-He was in my head- h-he- he said he was gonna k-kill you- Mags- he said- he would k-kill Drift because I-I didn’t keep quiet-”

“You understand that he cannot do such things, Rodimus.”

“H-He said he would b-before though. I messed up s-so bad-”

“I know he did, little one.” Ultra Magnus reached forward again and this time Rodimus didn’t move away. “I will not allow him to harm you ever again, do you understand?”

The prime nodded a little, still uncertain. Magnus moved forward once more until he was close enough to caress a gentle hand across Rodimus’ trembling spoiler. The young prime’s voice was saturated with static. “H-he said- He said no one w-would ever want to t-touch me.”

“That is not for him to decide. Can I hold you?”

Rodimus shifted out from the corner and hiccupped loudly as Ultra Magnus pulled him into his arms. When he finally held the smaller mech against his chest, the former Enforcer released the breath he’d been holding and allowed his hands to smooth down Rodimus’ flared plating. 

Ultra Magnus continued to pet the sobbing mech against him as Ratchet arrived in the doorway. The medic stayed outside with a gesture from Thunderclash as the blue mech continued to speak in low tones. “You must understand that you are worthy of the utmost care. He cannot decide what others think of you and he shan’t ever touch you again as long as I live. Do you understand?”

Still struggling, Rodimus pressed his face against the larger mech’s neck and curled up against him. Ultra Magnus didn’t care what the others present thought as he pressed a firm kiss to the young prime’s helm and soothed him with more whispered reassurances. He didn’t stop until the soft whirring of the speedster’s open vents told him that Rodimus was near falling into recharge.

He easily lifted the smaller mech in his arms as he stood and turned to Ratchet and Thunderclash. By that time, Drift, Rung and First Aid also stood outside the doorway. The white swordsmech’s faceplates were marred with dried tears, but he otherwise seemed to be in far better condition than he’d been in earlier.  
Ultra Magnus tucked Rodimus’ face against his neck cables as he hefted the red mech further up into the protective cage of his arms. The young prime had latched onto his plating with a vice-like grip and the former Enforcer knew that he couldn’t have escaped the hold even if he’ wanted to.

“If you have a large enough chair, doctor, I would sit and allow our captain to recharge with me.”

First Aid nodded and left the doorway as Ratchet came closer to begin a non-invasive scan. While the former CMO went about checking the young prime’s systems, Drift came forward and gently ran his fingertips across Rodimus’ spoiler. The red mech’s nasal ridge scrunched at the sensation and he moved slightly to peek out at his amica. Drift gave his friend a smile. “How are you, sweetspark?”

Rodimus reached out a hand and Drift took it in both of his own. The prime tucked himself more completely under Ultra Magnus’ chin and murmured sleepily. “Where is he?”

“He can’t get to you now.”

“Heard that before.”

Drift’s released a sigh of compressed air from his vents and watched as Ultra Magnus supported the prime’s helm with his large hand. The blue mech’s palm alone was nearly large enough to cover most of the smaller mech’s helm. The white speedster looked on and couldn’t help but smile as Rodimus fell into a light recharge within the protective embrace.

“I hope you know what you’re doing, Mags.”

The former Enforcer looked down at Drift as Rung came forward with a heated blanket. Both mechs watched as the little psychiatrist wrapped the warm sheet around the parts of the captain that he could reach. Rung gave Ultra Magnus a knowing look as he worked and the larger couldn’t help but feel exposed under the orange mech’s scrutiny. 

Rung had just backed away when Thunderclash peeked his helm back into the room. “The jury has already reached a decision, sir.”

Checking to find Rodimus still in recharge, Ultra Magnus nodded for the bright mech to continue.

“It was a unanimous decision for a guilty verdict, sir, on all accounts presented before the, uhm- disturbance occurred.”

“I do not like leaving the trial unfinished, but it would appear that enough proof was presented. Were Megatron’s actions during the proceedings also reviewed?”

Thunderclash nodded, eyeing the sleeping Rodimus under the heated blanket. His face was soft as he regarded the smaller mech with a mix of concern and adoration. It was blatantly obvious that he wished he were in Magnus’ place. “Yes sir, I reminded them that Megatron’s actions in the court room should also be taken into account as they reached a verdict.”

Rodimus squirmed in Ultra Magnus’ grip just enough so that a pair of brilliant blue optics could peek out at Thunderclash. “Thanks, Thunders.”

The one-time Matrix holder’s optical ridges shot up in shock before he bowed a little at the waist. “Of course, captain.”

Ultra Magnus looked down at the mech in his arms. “Would you rather recharge in the berth?”

The tightening of Rodimus’ fingers on his plating was all the answer that the blue mech needed as he sat down in the chair provided by First Aid. Ratchet completed an analysis of the scans as they two mech’s settled down under the heated blanket. “Everything looks good, no new injuries or aggravated old ones. I’d offer a light pain dampener, but I know you’d refuse.”

As expected, Rodimus didn’t want the pain dampeners as he nestled against Ultra Magnus. The old medic turned away without any kind of lecture as he pulled his conjunx into a crushing embrace. Drift was more than happy with the show of affection and hid his face against Ratchet’s neck before the pair left the room. The swordsmech gave his recharging amica one final look before allowing himself to be led away.

Ultra Magnus directed his attention back to Thunderclash. “I will approach the subject of Megatron’s punishment soon enough. Until that time, I place you in charge of Megatron’s care.”

The other mech nodded in understanding as he straightened and prepared to go. Before he turned though, Thunderclash cast another longing look at the recharging mech. Rodimu’s face was hidden in the shadow of Ultra Magnus’ jawline, tucked comfortably away within the confines of the blanket. “Sir, I am glad that Rodimus has found someone who appreciates him. He is truly lucky to have you.”

The implication struck Ultra Magnus nearly too late. His cheeks burnt with an unexpected blush. “You misunderstand, I am nothing special to Rodimus-“

Thunderclash offered a perfect smile from his handsome face. Truly, anybot would be exceedingly lucky to have and court the greatest Autobot of all time. “But he is special to you. Plus, I have observed the way that he is drawn to you, sir. He adores you and I am happy to know that he will be well cared for.”

The brightly colored mech left then and Ultra Magnus was left staring dumbly after him. The former Enforcer watched as Rung, who’d heard the entire conversation, grinned at him before closing the door. Upon being left alone, Magnus pulled back to look down at the smaller mech.

Rodimus’ face was still streaked with old tears, but he looked otherwise peaceful as he recharged. The young prime’s fans spun quietly with every exvent of air that left his vents, dousing the larger mech with warmth as the speedster’s frame released excess heat from his engine. Though they’d relaxed their hold, dainty golden fingers still curled around the edges of Ultra Magnus’ armor. The SIC studied the hands and saw that the palms had been repainted where the gold had been nervously stripped off by Rodimus.

As quietly and slowly as possible, the larger mech rested himself back until he could lay his helm against the wall behind the chair. He wanted nothing more than to recharge and the warmth of Rodimus against him was beginning to make him drowsy. But Magnus was unable to get the vision of Megatron’s optics out of his helm. He could still hear Rodimus’ terrifying cries as the usually confident mech crammed himself into the corner of the medbay. As the scenes from the past cycle replayed themselves in his processor, Ultra Magnus felt himself nearly brought to tears by the hardships his captain had suffered.

_He is truly lucky to have you. ___

__Thunderclash’s words emerged from his memory files and Ultra Magnus felt a surge of excitement at the thought. What if they were right? The blue mech lifted the bot on his chest higher as he settled his racing spark. Rodimus’ comfort and needs were paramount and Magnus wanted only what was best for the captain. As he finally slowed his processor down to recharge, Ultra Magnus knew that he would happily serve in whatever capacity the young prime desired as long as it meant the SIC could be a part of his lifecycle._ _


	18. Chapter 18

The hardest part was recharging. The nightmares seemed to be recorded and set up to play back before his optics, almost like Rewind had recorded each and every torture that Megatron had inflicted on him. Rodimus dreamed over and over of the painful interfaces when he couldn’t hold back his cries. He relived every strike of those black fists and every word of disgust, each night cycle until the next shift came and he woke again.

Rodimus was aroused from one such memory to a voice, deep and oh so sweet. The young prime shifted to test his mobility and found himself wrapped loosely in a blanket. For the first time in a long while, he almost felt serene.

The voice came again, this time paired with the barest brushed of a hand to his sensitive spoiler. Just that touch alone was enough to chase the nightmares into the farthest corners of the young prime’s mind. He rooted around while keeping his optics closed and whined happily when he felt himself nuzzle against the cables of the mech pressed against him.

“Rodimus? Are you awake?”

The mech in question jolted awake. The red mech calmed again klik later however as he recognized the field swirling around him. Still emerging form the fog of sleep, Rodimus blinked rapidly up at the mech whose arms he occupied. 

Ultra Magnus gazed down at him from above, lips twitching as if he were trying not to smile. “Hello, captain.”

“Hey. Uh, what’s up?”

Recharging with Magnus had become a normal occurrence over the cycles as it became nearly impossible for the young prime to grab a moment’s rest. Memories haunted him whenever he tried to sleep and, if he did manage to drop into recharge, the nightmares held him for every klik until he woke again. He always came online exhausted as if he hadn’t defragged at all.

The larger mech flicked one of the other’s finials and Rodimus twisted away with a giggle. “I am well. How are you feeling?”

The sleepless cycles seemed to be affecting Ultra Magnus as well. Dark dents had become visible under his optics, the result of poor energon intake and little rest put aside for processing what he did take. The SIC couldn’t have been recharging barely at all for such marks to appear. His voice was also catching in his vocalizer, almost like he didn’t have enough energy to push the sound out. Even though he continuously denied it, Rodimus could tell that Ultra Magnus was suffering as a result of his neediness.

Neediness. Why couldn’t he just grow up and stop being ridiculous? Megatron was behind bars. Thunderclash, Drift and Ultra Magnus along with many others had put him there and assured the prime that the ex-warlord would never be free to walk the ship again. Why was it so hard to be alone?

Rodimus had used to love being by himself. It gave him a chance to hide the wounds and the tears so that others wouldn’t notice. Being alone gave him a chance to remind himself that he could handle it in order to keep the rest of them safe. But now, the thought of being alone with his processor was terrifying and made him feel sick.

“Captain?”

Rodimus hurriedly refocused on Ultra Magnus, immediately noticing the shadows under the other’s usually bright optics. “Yeah, yeah I’m good. Listen, Mags, you should probably go.”

A spear of hurt was the last thing that the prime expected to feel as it passed through his SIC’s field. It was quickly covered with concern, however, as the other mech inquired with a low tone. “Do you want me to leave you?”

Despite wanting Ultra Magnus to stay with him, Rodimus knew that the bigger mech needed more rest than what he was getting by recharging in the chair. Magnus also was in terrible need of a healthy meal of energon. “I’ll be okay. Why don’t you go get a good recharge? Somewhere that you can lay down.”

The blue mech spun his fans momentary before he looked back down at the young prime. “I suppose you are correct. Shall I comm. for Drift?”

Rodimus quickly shook his helm. The last thing he wanted was to be a problem for anyone else or to take up another bot’s time. “No, I’m good.” He gave the former Enforcer a convincing laugh. “I don’t need to be babysat, Mags. I’m a grown bot.”

“True, you are. But you have also faced severe trauma and-“

“I said I’m fine.”

His tone had come across much harsher than Rodimus had meant for it to. Ultra Magnus’ field retreated noticeably, leaving a chill behind that the captain hadn’t felt for some time. The SIC carefully maneuvered out from under the smaller mech to leave the red speedster sitting in the chair on his own. “I did not mean to overstep any boundaries, sir. If you need anything at all, I will notify Ratchet so that he may be available to you.”

Rodimus watched as the towering form of Ultra Magnus turned and left the room without another word. The click of the door was what broke through the red mech’s shock at what he’d just done.

He hadn’t meant to be rude or cold. He simply hadn’t wanted to be a burden any longer and felt that sending the other mech away would… 

Slag.

Rodimus stared at the closed door, wishing that he could take back what he’d said to the blue mech. Ultra Magnus deserved far better treatment than that, especially after all he’d done for the young prime. Despair settled in as Rodimus sank back against the chair and he was left alone with his processor and the memories.


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Long chapter y'all. Enjoy :)

What had he been thinking?

_You weren’t thinking. ___

__Rodimus flinched at the voice in his head, ever present after the trial. It was almost like Megatron could still talk directly into his very spark._ _

___You thought he cared about you before? There’s no way he could ever care about you know. What mech sends away those who care about him? No one worth staying for. ____ _

____The red mech pulled his knees to his chest as tears began to gather in his optics. “No, no, he just needs a break, he needs to take care of-“_ _ _ _

_____He sees you for what you are, Rodimus. Sees that you’re just an attention-seeking whore. ____ _ _ _

______“He knows I’m-“_ _ _ _ _ _

_______Pathetic? A waste of space? He knows who you are and he knows that you are worth no time of his. That’s why he left so easily. He won’t ever come back. ____ _ _ _ _ _

________A whimper broke from his vocalizer and Rodimus dragged his fingertips against the palm of his other hand. He tried desperately to block out the voice as he pulled the blanket more tightly around himself. “Ultra Magnus knows what happened to me. He will come back. He cares about me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The last sentence sounded more like a question as it left his mouth. The voice laughed lowly from where it had made its home in his helm._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________He did once, but you sent him out, like he was just another one of your little soldiers. He knows he means nothing to you now. He won’t come back. ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Rodimus scrambled to stand form the chair but found himself too tired to do so. He hadn’t used his peds in what felt like forever. First Aid had insisted that Rodimus allow his injuries time to recover before he tried walking by himself._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________The young prime kicked out at the chair in frustration only to lose his balance and tumble to the floor. He clawed at his wrist with renewed vigor and felt pain blossom throughout his arm at the treatment. He deserved it for the way he’d treated Magnus just then._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________It’s better this way. Ultra Magnus deserves far better than you could ever offer him anyway. ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

____________A moan broke from Rodimus’ throat as he felt the wetness of freshly spilled energon coat his fingers. He looked down to find that he’d torn all the way through his paint and his armor. Mutilated cables poked out from between the mech’s plating, stinging as they came into contact with the open air. They were jagged where Rodimus had gouged his fingers into the delicate protoform and he watched with sick fascination as energon pumped out to the tempo of his spark beat. “He’s better off without me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_____________Indeed he is. They all are. Why can’t you let them be happy? ____ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The room seemed to settle into shifting waves as more energon emptied from the breached cables. Rodimus watched, transfixed, as the fluid puddled on the floor at his knees. “I’m making them unhappy. They deserve to be happy.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Deliberately, the red speedster dug the tip of a finger into his wrist, causing more cables to strain and rip under the pressure. More energon bubbled from the ripped cables and trailed lazily down his armor._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Then, as if the large mech were there with him again, Rodimus remembered Ultra Magnus’ promise. The memory of the blue mech’s voice rang stronger than Megatron’s ever had and before he could stop himself he’d opened a comm. to the other mech. :Mags, you there?:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________A moment went by before an answering comm. came back. :Yes, captain.:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Rodimus forced every emotion of embarrassment and pride away from himself. He decided to jump, desperate for something that he wasn’t used to asking for. Tears started to form in his optics as he whispered into the comm. :Magnus, please, I need help-:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________:Rodimus? Are you alright?:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________:You said to call you- if I ever thought of hurting- :_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________A pause on the other end of the comm. :I will be there soon. I have notified First Aid. Have you already…?:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The young prime watched as more half-processed energon leaked from his wrist. The flow had slowed somewhat. :I’m so sorry, please don’t be mad at me.:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________First Aid swung open the door, caught sight of Rodimus on the floor, and immediately called over his shoulder for Ratchet. As the CMO crouched beside him on the floor, the red speedster received another comm. from the former Enforcer. :I’m not mad at you. I’m glad that you called me. I’m coming in now.:_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Rodimus heard the door key open and didn’t bother lifting his gaze from the floor as he began rambling, praying that former Enforcer could somehow forgive him. “Mags, I’m so sorry I sent you away, and I was mean about it and I know you need rest too, but I don’t want to-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________A small hand settled on the side of Rodimus’ helm and he suddenly found himself looking straight across into ruby-red optics. The speedster had just recognized who was before him when the green bot spoke in that same familiar voice. “You have no reason to be sorry, my prime.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“M-Minimus?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The serious little mech stepped aside slightly so that First Aid could continue to work on the prime’s arm. Minimus Ambus’ facial insignia twitched slightly in reaction to Rodimus’ blatant staring. “Sir, I know that you were already aware of my irreducible form…”’_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“Yeah, but I just didn’t expect you to show up like this.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“Is it… unsettling to you?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Minimus was treated to a look of remorse as it crossed the red mech’s face. “Not at all! I just didn’t expect you to take the armor off to come here.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The now much smaller mech kept his hand on the other’s cheek as he whispered softly. “I am glad that this form is not off putting to you. I… I am not yet comfortable around the crew in this form, it is true. All the same, I had just taken the armor off for the cycle when you called.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The unspoken confession was clear to Rodimus as he lifted his good hand to cover the smaller one on his face. Minimus had been in a hurry to reach him, such a hurry, in fact, that he didn’t care whether or not the crew saw him without the Magnus armor on. Upon receiving the comm., the only thing that mattered at all to the green bot had been reaching his prime._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Touched by the display of loyalty, Rodimus found himself looking away. “I couldn’t stop it, I’m sorry.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Even though he was small, Minimus Ambus still managed to pull Rodimus Prime’s face against his own chest. “I do not need your apologies. I simply am glad that you chose to call me in your time of need.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“You need to rest and refuel. That’s why I made you leave. I didn’t mean to be so short with you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________A soft rumble came from the one-percenter’s chest and the captain realized that the green mech was laughing. “I understand. Perhaps I truly was putting myself at risk by not giving my frame its proper care. My lack of selfcare, however, is not your fault, though I am flattered that you would care for me enough to notice it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________A smile touched Rodimus face as he allowed his helm to rest over the other’s spark. Feeling no need to move, the pair stayed that way, basking in the other’s company until First Aid finished welding the worst of the damaged cords closed. Ratchet had also arrived by then and, seeing that Minimus was doing a well enough job of calming the prime, he wordlessly went about assisting First Aid in cleaning and dressing the area around Rodimus’ wrist._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Rodimus felt Minimus’ field swirling around him, holding him in close to the little green mech as the last bits of his armor were welded into place. A small hand massaged the back of his neck, easing out some of the tension that had settled there as the load bearer held them together._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________It was as if the sun broke through the clouds in that moment, like every hurt he’d ever endured left his memory as he leaned into the other mech’s touch. Rodimus felt the light pressure of lips against his helm and sighed as he allowed himself to relax. The red speedster opened his optics as he did and watched as Minimus’ armor grew foggy where he ex-vented. A soft purr came from the mech he rested against and Rodimus felt an equally tired sigh come from the bot above him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Ratchet finished wrapping medical grade soaked rags around the newly repaired wound and sat back on his heels. “You’ll likely have heavy scarring to your protoform. With therapy, we might see about getting full mobility back.” The former CMO appeared to fight with himself for a moment before his optics flared brightly. Even though Rodimus expected the lecture, he hadn’t expected the medic’s voice to remain level and eerily soft during it. “What were you thinking?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Haltingly, Rodimus pulled away from the green bot to give Ratchet his full attention. “I wasn’t.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Instead of yelling or continuing to berate the young prime, Ratchet surprised him by leaning forward and pulling him into a strong embrace. It took Rodimus a moment to understand that the old medic was muttering against the side of his helm, rocking slightly as he did. “Stupid kid, stupid, stupid-“ Ratchet pulled back until he could see the prime head on. “Don’t you understand how loved you are? By Drift? By me? Don’t you understand that you deserve to be healthy and happy and safe?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The medic didn’t wait for an answer as he abruptly released Rodimus and turned to quickly exit the room. Before he made it out though, the prime caught sight of the moisture that had gathered on the usually gruff mech’s face. Optics wide and confused, Rodimus looked to Minimus questioningly. The smaller mech’s brow furrowed as he watched the door close behind Ratchet’s retreating form. “He feels as I do. We both desire for you to know that your pain is also ours, as it is also Drift’s. You do not bear it alone, my prime.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Rodimus allowed himself to be supported as he was helped onto his medberth by First Aid. The medic gave him a look as he produced a cube of medical grade and Rodimus took it with a groan, knowing that it would taste bitter. As he quickly gulped it down, the CMO spoke. “I’ll have to notify Rung of this incident so that he may decide further action as far as diagnosis or treatment.” The medic raised a hand as the captain tried to argue. “You’ll also have someone with you around the clock from here on out. It’s not a punishment, Rodimus, but we have to make sure that an occurrence such as this doesn’t happen again. Right now, you need to be able to focus on getting better and Rung can help you to do that.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Upon receiving no further response from the sullen prime, First Aid nodded to Minimus before leaving the room. As the door clicked closed behind the medic, Minimus hopped up into the chair with a rather undignified squeak as his aft hit the seat. Rodimus flicked his gaze to the green mech quickly. “I bet you didn’t get any time to recharge or fuel. I can see if Drift-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________“I did refuel, in fact. My irreducible self requires less energon as the Magnus armor does to function.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The load bearer blinked up at the fire-emblazoned mech with undeniably sleepy optics. Rodimus was suddenly aware of how large the medberth was, designed to hold mech’s or femmes far larger than himself. “Hey, Mims? You wanna just recharge here?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The small mech cocked his head sharply and looked quite scandalized by the prospect of sharing a berth with his captain. But before Rodimus could retract his offer though, Minimus was clumsily shuffling his frame over onto the medberth and under the covers to lay alongside the speedster._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________The temperature difference was immediately noticeable as Rodimus’ racing engine required him to run quite a bit hotter than the little green bot. Minimus’ armor was cooler than his own and popped a little as it was exposed to the heat radiating from the prime’s plating. “I hope I’m not too hot for you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________His word choice immediately had Rodimus blushing and he tried to think of ways to backpedal. Again, before he could drown in embarrassment, Minimus snuggled closer, a surprisingly unguarded expression on his face. When he looked up at the red speedster, he didn’t bat an optic nor did his face betray a thing as he murmured quietly. “You are exactly hot enough for me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Rodimus watched with a stunned expression as the former Enforcer made a little nest for himself on the medberth. Finally, as if it were the most natural thing in the world, Minimus curled up beside his berthmate and offlined his optics._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

______________Forcing himself to stop staring, Rodimus settled his racing spark and dismissed the request on his HUD to let his fans be activated. He doubted he’d get much recharge with the little mech so close, but he did know that he wouldn’t have Minimus Ambus anywhere else. Pushing down the urge to drape an arm around the other mech, the young prime offlined his optics and fell into a surprisingly easy recharge only moments later. It was the first time in a long while that he slept without a single nightmare to haunt him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	20. Chapter 20

“Why don’t we begin with you telling me what happened?”

Rodimus turned his face away from the psychiatrist. Rung had arrived earlier in the shift and had perched himself in the chair beside the medberth. It had been two shifts since the red mech’s ‘episode’. He didn’t bother to hide the embarrassment from his field as those who visited him coddled him like he was some fragile creature. They treated him like he’d lose his processor if they so much as spoke too loudly.

“I understand if you do not want to talk about it. But it would help if you did.”

The young prime’s vocalizer caught briefly as he lifted an angry gaze to the orange mech’s. “I’m not crazy. Everyone thinks I’ll deactivate myself if I’m left alone too long.”

“You aren’t crazy, Rodimus.” Rung adjusted his glasses. “So you were not trying to end your life when you tore your wrist cables?”

“Primus no! Is that what they think?”

Rodimus felt his throat constrict as Rung gave him a sad smile. “I certainly looked like it them. Why did you do it if it wasn’t to deactivate yourself?”

Rodimus twiddled his fingers together and felt the medpatch on his wrist tighten slightly with the movement. “I don’t know. I deserved it?”

Rung scratched something down on the datapad in his lap. “What happened immediately before you began harming yourself?”

The red mech swallowed thickly. “I made Ultra Magnus leave.”

“Why did you do that?”

“He needed rest. And fuel. He wasn’t getting it when he stayed with me and it was hurting him.” Fixing his attention on his lap, the prime murmured more quietly. “I was hurting him.”

The orange mech lifted an optical ridge. “So you punished yourself?”

“Yeah, kind of, I guess. I was short with him when I told him to leave.”

The slender bot in the chair scrawled more notes. “Do you think Ultra Magnus is upset with you after what happened?”

Rung then watched as Rodimus physically retreated from the question, clasping his hands and twisted them together as the prime’s optics darted about the room. “I… he doesn’t really act like it. None of them seem angry with me, really. Not even Ratchet after a I made the mess on the floor.”

More scratching of notes on the datapad. “Why do you think that is?”

“Huh?”

“Why do you think it is that they aren’t angry with you?”

Rodimus squinted at the psychiatrist across from him, trying to figure out where this was going. “Megatron would’ve been angry with me. I don’t know why they aren’t.”

Rung leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees. “There is something that you must understand, Rodimus. You must remember that no matter what you did to anger Megatron, none of it was not worthy of the treatment that he unleashed on you. He has convinced you that everything wrong that happens is automatically your fault. It is a manipulation tactic.”

“But I’m not a good captain! He was just trying to fix what I did wrong, he was making me better-“

“Was he?” The orange mech wanted somehow to comfort the mech before him as Rodimus visibly recoiled from the truth. 

The scarlet prime’s fists were clenched tight and so was his field. “I’m not a good captain.”

“Who told you that?”

Rodimus lifted his helm. “M-Megatron.”

Rung smiled. “Do you think what he did to you made him a good captain? Using his strength and charisma to overpower and destroy instead of using such talents to build his fellow mech’s up?”

“No.”

“Have you ever used your power as a wrecking ball instead of a lighthouse?”

The red mech gave him a quizzical quirk of his brow ridge. “What’s that mean?”

“Have you ever used your position as captain to maim or injure?” The psychiatrist was pleased to see the prime consider the question carefully before Rodimus shook his helm in the negative. “No you haven’t. Instead, you have acted as the lighthouse, always inspiring hope and guiding your crew with the bright positivity that you naturally possess.”

“What about Nyon? I- I destroyed it. My friends. My home.”

Rung couldn’t resist reaching across the space then and laying his hand atop the captain’s. “You saved it from a far worse fate. Decisions like that are not easy by any means, but it shows that you are capable of making such choices all the same. Yes, it was between two evils. But you did what you thought was right and not what was easiest for yourself.”

Rodimus nodded stiffly, his throat cables working. The psychiatrist studied the other mech for a moment longer before moving to close out hid datapad. “I think that’s enough for the day. Is someone waiting for you outside?”

“Mags is outside.”

The orange mech tried to conceal a grin of satisfaction at the revelation. Ever since the incident of Rodimus’ self-injury, the SIC had been glued to the young prime’s side, ensuring that the red speedster took fuel, recharged and regularly completed his therapy exercises. Rung hadn’t been sure initially if such hovering would be helpful to Rodimus’ recovery. However, time had proven that Ultra Magnus’ presence had greatly influenced the red mech’s confidence and dedication to moving on. The pair were rapidly becoming inseparable, only apart long enough for Magnus to complete his shift on the bridge and when Rodimus was visiting Rung or Drift.

Rung watched, impressed, as Rodimus easily swung himself up and out of his chair. Before reaching for the door, the prime turned back to the smaller mech. “Hey, Rung?”

“Yes, Rodimus?”

“Um, I was thinking… I think I’m ready to renew my bond with Drift now. Do you think I can?”

A gentle laugh came from the slender bot in the chair. “I believe that that it is up to you. If you feel like trying, then I can comm. Ratchet and have you released from the medbay.” Just as the red mech began to celebrate, Rung continued. “But you must visit First Aid and Ratchet in order to keep up with your therapy and checkups. And I’ll also be scheduling further visits to my office as well.”

“I really don’t need to-“

“Should I ask Ultra Magnus to ensure that you go?”

“Okay, okay, I’ll go.”

Rodimus pranced out of the office, no doubt eager to meet with the blue mech who waited for him outside. The little psychiatrist reclined slightly in his chair as he sat the datapad on the desk corner beside him. To see the young prime so excited was a relief, especially if it had anything to do with Ultra Magnus. Rung mused quietly to himself as he prepared to comm. Ratchet about preparing Rodimus to bond with Drift.


	21. Chapter 21

Rodimus tried to keep himself still where he sat on his berth. Earlier the previous shift, Ratchet had run a diagnostic on the young prime’s spark and had decided that he was fit to renew his bond with Drift. 

As Rodimus had recovered, he’d begun to notice the yearning for his amica within the depths of his spark. Now, as he sat on the edge of his spacious berth, the feeling had grown until he could no longer ignore the discomfort that it caused. It felt like his spark casing would break all over again if he didn’t bond with his amica soon.

The door beeped, signaling a correctly entered code, and slid open.

Drift strode inside, his gaze immediately resting on his best friend. “Hey, Roddy.”

His voice alone made Rodimus’ spark swell and threaten to burst. He’d been away from the other mech for far too long. Stuttering terribly, the prime stood to greet his visitor. “Listen, Drift, I’m sorry I kept putting it off and it really does hurt and I’m-“

A black fingertip landed on Rodimus’ lips and the red mech looked into his amica’s optics. He saw nothing but forgiveness and understanding there in those sapphire depths as Drift moved to kiss each of his cheeks. The swordsmech took his time with the kisses and Rodimus felt himself relax under the careful treatment. “I’m just glad you’re okay, babe. It won’t hurt for much longer.”

Rodimus smiled and took his friend’s hand to draw him back onto the berth. The white speedster practically bowled the other over as they tumbled into a laughing tangle. The covers that Rodimus had long ago insisted on buying allowed them to sink somewhat into the large berth. The prime batted playfully at his amica as they curled up to face each other. By the time they’d finished wrestling around, their nasal ridges brushed together as their engines purred in perfect sync.

“I missed you so bad, Drift.”

The white mech sprinkled more kisses across the scarlet mech’s face and finials. “Primus, Roddy. When we found you that day in the closet… Rodimus, I thought I lost you. I thought my spark was gonna go out-“

“But you didn’t lose me, sweetspark. I’m right here and I’m never going away again.”

Rodimus folded the other mech’s helm against his neck cables as Drift forced away the choking sensation in his vocalizer. “He told me. He told me what he did to you.” The prime froze as his amica’s trembling voice reached his audials, muffled against his neck. “Megatron told me in the court room, in my comm. He told me all those awful things he did-“

The pair pressed against each other, a mess of arms, legs and tears as they held on tight. Rodimus didn’t know what he could say that would ease the panic his amica had experienced. Likewise, Drift wasn’t sure how he could help his friend after learning about what the red speedster had endured.

The young prime was the first to move, pulling back enough to meet his berthmate’s optics. “You ready?”

Drift nodded and triggered his chest plates apart. Rodimus watched as the armor retracted, followed quickly by blinding light as the swordsmech’s spark casing began to iris open. As the brilliant spark glowed before him, emotions filled Rodimus’ field and threatened to spill over. “Oh, Drift.”

The speedster opposite him retreated a little, spark spinning with nervous energy. “What’s wrong? If you aren’t ready yet, it’s okay. I don’t want you to-“

The soft sound of moving parts cut Drift off mid-sentence and he watched as Rodimus’ spark came into view. The prime’s spark was noticeably brighter than his own, having been touched by the holy power of the Matrix of Leadership. Above the gloriously flaring beacon of light, Rodimus watched his amica with a serene face. “I love you, Drift. And I’m so sorry that I ever let you think otherwise.”

Tendrils from each of the glimmering sparks intertwined with each other, stretching across the space between the two mechs. The blue lights wove together, drawing their owners closer together in a familiar dance. A sob broke from Drift’s throat at the feeling as the burning need for his amica came ever nearer to being sated. “Primus, I love you, Roddy, please-“

The prime gripped his amica by the shoulders and pulled the other mech flush against himself, closing the final distance between their chests. There was a moment of nothing as their forehelms collided and they both gasped. A jolt of pure electricity passed through them and suddenly the room, the ship, the universe, _their existence _all seemed to disappear as the amica enduras joined completely as one, as a single being.__

__Rodimus was hardly aware as Drift’s entire being flooded around him and his aches and pains were taken from him. His amica helped him bear the burdens he’d long carried alone with the abstract illusion of a smile as he did it. The young prime felt his body stiffen distantly before darkness closed over him and he was left floating in the ecstasy that only one coming home again can feel._ _

__

__~o0o~_ _

__

__Ultra Magnus fixed a glare on the door to the brig as he approached. Nightbeat, reading his superior’s expression, wordlessly keyed in for the door to open. The detective nodded briefly before returning to stand stock still, staring off into empty space._ _

__The SIC had elected not to tell Rodimus of his special visit to Megatron’s cell. He knew that today was the day that the young prime would renew his neglected bond with his amica and didn’t want to interrupt. Ultra Magnus didn’t want to ruin the occasion with talk about the trial, especially the fact that today was the day that he would pass judgement on the ex-warlord._ _

__Rodimus had already been reluctant to leave Magnus’ side, even if it was to satisfy the growing discomfort in his spark by bonding his amica. Just earlier the SIC delivered the red mech to the captain’s quarters with the promise that he’d be back later. Upon making sure that Drift arrived, Ultra Magnus had made his way briskly down to the brig._ _

__The cell was dark save for the light of a single-function datapad. The former Enforcer watched as Megatron leisurely wrote what was likely another of his many poems. The blue mech cleared his throat and the mech it the cell slowly looked up. “Magnus.”_ _

__“Megatron.”_ _

__They regarded each other momentarily before Ultra Magnus commed Nightbeat. :Open Megatron’s cell.:_ _

__:Sir?:_ _

__:That’s an order, Nightbeat.:_ _

__After a klik or two, Ultra Magnus inclined his helm as the cell door slid open to leave nothing between himself and the silver mech. Megatron casually closed the datapad and placed it on the berth at his side. “What brings you down here and away from my intended?”_ _

__“He is no longer your intended. I come to deliver the judgement agreed upon unanimously by the jury.” The SIC rolled his shoulders back and cleared his vocalizer. “Megatron of Tarn, you have been found guilty of the attempted murder of Rodimus Prime of Nyon. You have also been found guilty on several counts of battery. You have been charged with the obstruction of an amica endura bond which resulted in life threatening harm. You have been-“_ _

__“Will that be all, Magnus?”_ _

__Ultra Magnus forced his field to remain neutral. “It is not, no. I have more charges with which you have been sentenced.”_ _

__The silver mech smirked, allowing a single fang to glitter from his mouth as he did. “Why don’t we proceed to the sentencing itself then?”_ _

__“Gladly. I hereby sentence you to be removed back to Cybertron. Once there, you will face judgement under a jury chosen by Optimus Prime and Lord Starscream.”_ _

__Of all things, the SIC didn’t expect Megatron to chuckle. “Really, Magnus? You’d just pass me off to another jury? Have you not the gears to deactivate me yourself.”_ _

__“I believe that is the job of the mech who sent you here. I am certain your jury shall be fair as you and Lord Starscream were on the same side during the war.”_ _

__The blue mech allowed the irony to drip from his voice as he began to back out of the room. As he turned to go, a low voice came from the ex-warlord on the berth. “Is he broken in enough for you?”_ _

__Ultra Magnus turned back. “I’m sorry?”_ _

__The silver mech grinned nastily at him. “For fragging. It would seem that you’ve taken quite a liking to my intended.”_ _

__Again Magnus struggled to keep his field mellow and level. “He is not your intended.”_ _

__“So you don’t deny it?” Megatron prowled toward the blue mech, denta glistening in the dim lighting. “I’m surprised you’d even touch him, being as used up as he is.”_ _

__“That is enough-“_ _

__“I don’t expect you to have the highest of standards, Magnus, but really. You’ve seen the mess that he is.”_ _

__“Megatron, you are-“_ _

__“Your precious little prime has been used so many times, he’d probably take you without any preparation. The little whore that he is-“_ _

__Ultra Magnus saw red. His hand struck out before he could stop himself and connected with Megatron’s aquiline nose. The silver mech’s helm pitched backward with the force of the blow and the former Enforcer watched from some distant corner of his processor as the ex-warlord stumbled backward. Megatron’s knees hit the berth and he tumbled onto his aft, energon spurting from his crumpled olfactory sensors._ _

__“I- I-“ Ultra Magnus studied his pink-splattered fist with varying degrees of horror. He’d struck a prisoner, a prisoner with no weapon and who was no threat to himself._ _

__The SIC had just decided to write himself up for the incident when Megatron released a gravely laugh from the berth. He looked up to find the silver mech leaned against the back wall of his cell, licking at the energon that dribbled down over his mouth. “Looks like you’re well on your way, Magnus. That pathetic excuse for a prime is in good hands.”_ _

__Ultra Magnus lifted his optics to meet Megatron’s again and silenced the quaking that had taken its hold the irreducible frame of Minimus Ambus deep within. “Do not refer to Rodimus Prime in such a way again. If you do so, the result has been demonstrated.”_ _

__When Megatron offered nothing further, the SIC made himself move slowly out of the cell to watch it close. “Your tenure on the Lost Light has come to and end. Sentencing shall be carried out tomorrow following finalization by the captain of this vessel.”_ _

__The silver mech stared after him, energon still flowing over his lips, as Ultra Magnus let himself out of the brig._ _

__Once free of the shadow-swathed cells, the SIC was able to think more clearly on what he’d done. Sure, he’d seen war and destruction. But in all his millennia of fighting and watching his comrades die, he’d never once broken the Autobot Code and struck a defenseless bot. The feeling of distress that accompanied his action left him feeling hollow and…_ _

__He found himself missing Rodimus Prime acutely as he fought within himself. Magnus knew that he was likely overreacting, but the law was his life. If he couldn’t uphold it in his own actions, was he worthy of enforcing it on this ship?_ _

__The big mech quickly made his way up to the captain’s chambers, virtually ignoring the others in the hallway as he went. His spark, capable of the most strenuous of feats, was swirling tumultuously in his chassis. Ultra Magnus knew of only one thing that had calmed him before, one thing that had eclipsed all else._ _


	22. Chapter 22

Rodimus and Drift lay in each other’s arms, both blinking away the last haze of the bonding. The red mech felt significantly better as he snuggled closer to his amica and lazily kissed at his white counterpart’s prominent helm fins. Drift’s nasal bridge screwed up at the sensation and scooted over to push his forehelm against Rodimus’ chest armor. The prime released a sigh. “I now that couldn’t have been easy.”

The swordsmech returned the kiss over Rodimus’ spark. “I’m just glad I can bear some of it for you.”

The amica bond acted like a type of equalizer. It gave the TIC some of Rodimus’ pain and, in turn, gifted the young prime with a hint of the serenity that Drift enjoyed with his meditation and in the strength of his conjunx endura bond. Summarily, renewing the amica bond had managed to somewhat ease the stress on Rodimus’ spark.

The captain curled over his best friend’s helm and giggled. “I feel so much better already, don’t you?”

Drift lifted his helm to better see his berthmate. Rodimus’ optics virtually sparkled with healthy light and his denta, fixed by the careful work of the medics, were brilliant as he smiled and laughed. The white speedster was struck anew by how beautiful his amica was, especially now that the prime’s spark had been properly bonded to and was no longer strained.

It was truly hard to look away from the shining plating of Rodimus’ sleek speedster build. Even though Drift could never desire the mech before him as anything more than his best friend, the sight of his amica so happy and alive had the swordsmech staring. “Primus, Roddy.”

A flicker of worry crept into the red mech’s field. “What’s wrong?”

The white mech reached across the space to run a thumb across his amica’s helm. “You…”

“Drift?”

“Just one bond and you even _look _better. I’m not just saying that, you actually look different.”__

__Rodimus lifted his hand to hold Drift’s harder against his cheek. The young prime’s face had flushed slightly at the praise and he seemed at a loss for words. “Thanks, Drifter. For everything.”_ _

__Before he could stop himself, Drift whispered in awe. “How is Magnus gonna resist you now?”_ _

__The young prime’s optics widened at his friend’s words. Were his feelings for the blue mech so obvious? Wait. Did Drift mean that Ultra Magnus might feel the same way?_ _

__By the time , Rodimus had finished trying to process Drift’s question, the other speedster was talking again. “You do like him back, right?”_ _

__Rodimus realized that his mouth had dropped open and he snapped it closed sharply. “I mean, yeah, but does he…?”_ _

__Drift laughed and lifted a pillow to swing it at his friend’s helm. “Are you serious? He follows you around like-“_ _

__A heavy knock sounded at the door, making both speedsters jump._ _

__Drift moved first, giving his amica an ‘I told you so’ smirk as he got up and made his way toward the door. Rodimus scrambled to sit upright, suddenly self-conscious, as the white mech triggered open the door. “Magnus? What’s up?”_ _

__The face of the former Enforcer was drawn as he shifted his feet outside in the hallway. Peeking around Drift, Rodimus could see that the big blue mech kept his gaze firmly on the ground as he spoke. “I understand that I am early and was not expected until later on in the shift.”_ _

__Ultra Magnus finally looked at Drift. He appeared to be genuinely upset to some degree, his hands clasped firmly out of sight behind his spinal strut. Both speedsters watched as the SIC shuffled his peds again, his vocalizer halting. “My deepest apologies, captain, but I have an incident to report.”_ _

__It was highly uncharacteristic of the former Enforcer to avoid eye contact as he spoke. As Rodimus stood from the berth and approached, Ultra Magnus blurted his reason for coming without any semblance of his usual poise. “There was an altercation between myself and a prisoner in the brig.”_ _

__Rodimus halted his advance across the room and felt a familiar sick feeing make its way up his throat. With the taste of old oil in his mouth, he forced the question from his vocalizer. “M-Megatron?”_ _

__The prime’s throat constricted further when the distressed mech in the doorway nodded. Ultra Magnus still refused to look up. “Yes, sir.”_ _

__Rodimus started forward again, more slowly this time. “Are- Did he hurt you?”_ _

__“No, no, sir.”_ _

__“Mags, what happened?”_ _

__The blue mech cast his gaze to the side as Rodimus finally came to stand in front of his tall form. “I struck an unarmed prisoner who was presenting no threatening behavior at the time. “I am aware that the Autobot Code-“_ _

__The former Enforcer was surprised when a light touch landed on his arm. Cautiously, Ultra Magnus shifted his optics to look down at his captain._ _

__Rodimus watched as the blue mech’s optics fixated on him and a stuttering breath was released form the bigger bot’s vents. He allowed himself to be confused by the reaction for a moment before redirecting the conversation back to the issue at hand. “Ultra Magnus, _what happened? _”___ _

____The mech swallowed quickly and his attention didn’t waver again as he cleared his vocalizer. “The prisoner committed slander against a superior officer. I failed to stop my reaction.” Ultra Magnus relaxed his arms and his formerly clasped hands came into view. His right one was streaked with half-dried energon. “I struck the prisoner one time about the face, dislocating and rendering useless his olfactory sensors and crushing his nasal bridge.”_ _ _ _

____For a klik, no one moved. Drift stood stock still just inside the door, stunned by the revelation. Ultra Magnus never lost his cool; the mech was the definition of cool. The former Duly Appointed Enforcer of the Tyrest Accord was always in control-_ _ _ _

____“I… understand that I have failed miserably to act according the laws that I have been given the honor of upholding. Therefore, captain, I leave my punishment at you discretion.”_ _ _ _

____Was he serious?_ _ _ _

____Rodimus removed his hand from the bigger mech’s arm as he forced himself to refocus on Ultra Magnus’ face. Although the former Enforcer still appeared to be upset, he also had a strange look in his optic. When the young prime tried to read the other mech’s field, all he found was a swirling chaos of self-directed disappointment, indecision and something that Rodimus was used to seeing in Drift’s field when the amicas were together._ _ _ _

____“Captain, I truly am sorry for my lack of-“_ _ _ _

____“Do you wanna get drinks at Swerve’s?”_ _ _ _

____Ultra Magnus stared down at the gorgeous speedster before himself and forced a hard reboot of his audials. Hadn’t Rodimus heard that he’d disobeyed the Autobot Code? Did the red mech not understand that he should be punished for his inability to control himself, the he should be removed as the second-in-command, that he should-_ _ _ _

____“I mean, if you’re gonna say no, just say it because this is awkward now and I’ll have to kill Drift when you leave so…”_ _ _ _

____The blue mech blinked down at the mech before him and read the distinct emotion of embarrassment in the prime’s face. The flame-emblazoned speedster had begun twisting his golden hands together in obvious discomfort. Ultra Magnus abruptly realized that Rodimus was waiting for an answer and that Magnus’ lack thereof indicated disinterest. “Y-yes, sir, I’ll accept, but my punishment-“_ _ _ _

____“Magnus.”_ _ _ _

____“…Yes, Rodimus?”_ _ _ _

____“I heard Swerve has a special running tonight. We should probably head that way, huh? We can talk about your ‘punishment’ or whatever when we get there. Over drinks.”_ _ _ _

____Drift practically danced out of the way as Rodimus maneuvered past Ultra Magnus and into the hall. The swordsmech spared the stunned blue mech a look before he winked at his amica. “Wish I could be there, Roddy, but I’m taking over on the bridge after Thunderclash’s shift ends. You wanna stay here tonight or at your place?”_ _ _ _

____Rodimus leaned in to hug his amica to himself. “I think I’ll try my place and see how it goes. I’ll comm. you if um- you know-“_ _ _ _

____“I know.” Drift squeezed his friend tightly before releasing the other speedster. Rodimus hadn’t been able to sleep alone yet due to the persistent nightmares. The young prime found that he could only escape them when in the company of either Ultra Magnus or Drift._ _ _ _

____The swordsmech stepped back to look at his captain and his SIC as they stood together outside his hab. Ultra Magnus still seemed rather confused at the turn of events as he followed after Rodimus. Even though it was clear that he wanted to finish the earlier conversation regarding an appropriate punishment for himself, the former Enforcer also seemed to be rather fixated on the glossy scarlet and gold speedster that smiled up at him. A thrill of happiness for his friend passed through Drift at the sight of Ultra Magnus’ undivided attentions. “Don’t have too much tonight. You aren’t cleared for high grade by Ratchet yet.”_ _ _ _

____Rodimus threw a mock pout over his shoulder as he led the blue Enforcer down the hall. “Yes, carrier, I’ll be good.”_ _ _ _


	23. Chapter 23

The sight of Ultra Magnus at Swerve’s usually signaled the start of several citations being written. The blue mech had a talent for spying everyone within, handing out tickets for public intoxication like they were energon goodies. Swerve himself even had a special song to be played if Magnus arrived, a covert alarm that told mechs to start slipping out before they got caught.

That shift, the former Enforcer followed the captain into the room. Rodimus was a regular at the bar and usually had no trouble mingling with his crew as they drank and danced their troubles away. The prime was at one time known for his dancing abilities.

But things had changed since the last time Rodimus had been around.

When he’d started courting Megatron, the ex-warlord had started off their relationship by insisting that Rodimus not dance when he went to Swerve’s. The prime complied, believing the silver mech when Megatron told him that it was just a subconscious bid for attention on the prime’s part and that such behavior was unbefitting of a captain. Soon after that, Megatron didn’t allow him to drink high grade when they went out. Finally, the silver ex-warlord didn’t want his intended to go to the establishment at all.

When Rodimus and Ultra Magnus first walked into the bar, everything came to screeching halt. The music tapered off into silence and the dance floor rapidly cleared as mechs and femmes alike parted to stand against the walls. Swerve, who’d been perched on the edge of the bar visiting with Tailgate, squeaked with panic and practically dove behind it where he couldn’t be seen. 

“Well, hello there, Cap. Long time no see, huh?”

Rodimus didn’t have time to move before a familiar bright yellow optic appeared right in front of his face. The prime shifted back and away from the sudden closeness only to run into Ultra Magnus behind him.

Whirl’s claws clicked excitedly as he came closer, crowding the red mech. “Aww, don’t be that way. First drink’s on me. Not Mags, but yours, yeah. Sound good?”

Before he could get a single word out in response, Rodimus was watching the helicopter bumble across the bar with an strange grace that only one such as Whirl could pull off. Rodimus shared a look with Ultra Magnus who towered behind him. The former Enforcer lifted an optical ridge but said nothing as they made their way further into the quiet room.

No one moved when the pair took seats at the bar. Rodimus felt his armor crawl as a several optics were fixed on him and his companion and he shifted a little closer to the blue mech. The young prime was about to apologize to Ultra Magnus and ask if they should leave when a hand lit on Rodimus’ arm.

Rung stood beside the captain as he leaned around and pressed a mildly flavored spritzer into Ultra Magnus’ hand. “It’s good to see you here, Rodimus. A special occasion maybe?”

Rodimus managed a small smile as he exchanged a glance with the blue mech beside him. “Yeah, you could say that.”

“Swerve says this is your fave, Cap, and I’m tryin’ not to judge you but seriously? Motor Oil?” Whirl chirped with obvious distaste as he slammed the tankard down next to Rodimus’ elbow. The thick mixture sloughed onto the countertop with the rough treatment. “Really expected something fancy. ‘Least you get the shavings in it, I guess.”

“Thanks, Whirl.”

“Yeah, whatever.” 

The gangly mech retreated to his lone chair at the other end of the bar as the rest of the present customers slowly began to resume their talking and dancing. The music cued back up from where Bluestreaker still eyed Ultra Magnus from where he stood by the drink dispensers. When the former Enforcer didn’t even look in his direction, the mech lifted the music it back to full volume and began to once again serve drinks.

As the last of the staring ceased, Rodimus crossed one leg over the other and leaned an elbow against the bar. He flashed a winning grin at the mech beside him, hoping that it worked. “So. I know you usually come here to write up citations, but it’s the only place I could think of for a first date.”

“A first date?”

“Well, yeah. I asked you out and now we’re here. But hey, it doesn’t have to be that if you’d rather we just-“

“No, no. This is our first date.” Ultra Magnus offered a small upturning of his lips in return as he sipped at the drink Rung brought him. It was perfectly flavored with all of his favorite metal shavings, but by the time he’d turned to thank the slight orange mech, Rung had returned to his seat beside Perceptor and Brainstorm. The little psychiatrist offered Ultra Magnus a wink before resuming his conversation with the scientists.

“You gonna tell me why you were in the brig earlier?”

Ultra Magnus took another drink, unsure of how much he wanted to divulge at the moment. He hadn’t planned on telling Rodimus about the sentencing until the next shift when it would be the captain’s job to sign the final papers. “I was delivering to him the jury’s decision and the accompanying punishment. I planned on briefing you tomorrow.”

The young prime traced the rim of his glass without looking up. “And?”

“He was found guilty on all counts. Megatron will be returned to Cybertron for a retrial under a jury selected by Optimus Prime and Starscream.”

Rodimus snorted. “Starscream, huh? He won’t get off easy then.” The red mech gulped a few mouthfuls from his drink. “You’re idea?”

“I made the suggestion, yes.”

Movement caught Ultra Magnus optic and he turned his helm in time to feel Rodimus’ smaller hand rest over his own on the countertop. The young prime, his armor glowing with alluring tones under the bar’s neon lights, gazed up at the former Enforcer with something that bordered on true happiness. Ultra Magnus found himself caught in the other mech’s warm, sapphire optics and the way that the speedsters spoiler flicked up whenever Rodimus looked his way. There was no use denying it anymore. Ultra Magnus knew that he was done for.

“I know I’ll never say it enough, but thank you, Mags.”

The former Enforcer rolled his hand over until he could feel the golden hand in his own palm. The prime’s long fingers drew half-formed glyphs on the former Enforcer’s wrist all the way out to his pale fingertips. The sensation was deliciously stirring in a way that Ultra Magnus had never felt before.

“You are most welcome, my prime.” Deep within, Minimus Ambus’ spark spun faster as he saw the prime through the optics of the Magnus armor. He became aware of the harsh reality of what he was feeling in his chassis and shoved away the emotions that accompanied it as they began to cloud his processor. 

Rodimus tilted his helm to the side. “Why do you call me that?”

“Hm?”

“Why do you call me your prime? Optimus is the prime. I gave up the Matrix, so why do you call me that?”

Ultra Magnus shook away the last of whatever he’d begun feeling and curled his fingers to play with the red mech’s. “Do you wish for me to cease calling you such?”

“No, I just… why?”

Magnus watched the handsome mech fidget for a moment before taking a swig of his spritzer. “Indeed, Optimus is the prime on Cybertron. But you are here. You are my prime and my captain. I obey your command. I would gladly give my life for you.”

The red mech shuttered his optics rapidly and ran his free hand down his face as he chuckled weakly. “That’s pretty intense, Mags. I’m not sure I’d want you to go that far for me.”

“I have followed you thus far and I would continue to do so even if it resulted in certain death, Rodimus.”

Rodimus folded his fingers around the hand against his own. The rest of the bar had long since faded around them, reduced to mere background noise. Nothing, it seemed, was more important than the moments they shared after Ultra Magnus had finished his confession. The speedster had to remind himself to open his vents as his core temperature rose under the blue mech’s intense gaze. “You wanna get out of here?”

“Is our date over so soon?”

The sultry look Rodimus gave him told Ultra Magnus that it would be far from over if he followed the speedster out of the bar. The stirring from moments earlier returned in the form of a burning heat low in his chassis. It had been so long since he’d felt it, but the way that the young prime was looking at him told the former   
Enforcer exactly what was going on. “Rodimus, I cannot interface with you.”

Surprise passed over the red mech’s face, soon followed by embarrassment. Though the red mech’s field had been immediately locked down upon Ultra Magnus’ words, the former Enforcer still caught the sense of shame that roiled within the smaller mech. “Yeah, no, it’s okay. I get it.”

Almost too late, Ultra Magnus remembered what Megatron had told the little prime in the court room. “Do not misunderstand, little one. I would enjoy nothing more than to share something so intimate with you. However, I believe it would be more appropriate to wait for the time being.”

“Why?”

“Why not?”

“Well,” Rodimus lifted his hand away from Magnus’ to rub at the back of his helm. “It’s just… everyone wants that, right? They expect it.”

Ultra Magnus couldn’t help but smirk. “I assure you that I am not ‘everyone.’”

“I didn’t mean-“

A soft laugh cut the struggling prime off. “I understand what you meant, Rodimus. Before such a thing as interfacing were to occur, I desire to show you first that I value you for more than physical pleasure. You are worth far more than a single night in the berth.”

“Primus, you sounded like Thunderclash just now.” Rodimus stirred his drink distracted ly, his brow furrowed as he thought. His field was chaotic with emotion when he finally smiled. “So I guess you wanna be a thing then?”

“’A thing’?”

“Intended.”

“Ah. If you feel ready to entire such a relationship with me, then I gladly accept.”

“Wow. You really wanna court me?” The red speedster’s face was undeniably cute as he tried to process what was happening to him. 

“Of course I do. I have wanted to do so for quite some time.”

“Even after…?”

“Rodimus, it concerns me that you would still base your worth on the words of one who does not see how beautifully you shine.”

A flood of wild excitement thrilled through Rodimus’ field then. “You really do want to court me then. Ultra Magnus is courting me. I’m being courted by Magnus.” The prime gazed around the room and, for a horrible moment, the blue mech thought that he would announce it to the room. In the same klik, a part of Magnus almost hoped that the prime would.

“Rodimus.”

The enthusiastic prime looked back at him. “Yeah?”

“In loo of telling everybot in sight, may I kiss you?”

The stunning speedster nodded and Ultra Magnus didn’t waste any time in leaning in. 

The world around them didn’t matter then. For the first time in a long time, Ultra Magnus didn’t give a frag for appearances. Rodimus’ mouth was so soft and warm and welcoming-

As Magnus towered over him, the little prime felt protected instead of afraid. When the larger mech’s hands came up to cup the sides of his face, Rodimus didn’t flinch away as if he were being trapped or coerced. There was no hint of the pain that he’d become used to as the kiss deepened and the red speedster allowed his tongue to lightly flick against the bigger mech’s lips. 

Ultra Magnus pulled away too soon and Rodimus immediately thought that he’d gone too far. But a glimpse of the blue mech’s face, however, told him a different story. The former Enforcer’s face was covered in a heavy blush and his fans had clicked on at a low setting. A half-hearted glare from Ultra Magnus succeeded in drawing a hint of sheepish guilt into Rodimus’ field as the bigger mech growled. “You won’t make this easy will you?”

Rodimus didn’t bother to hide his wink as he hopped down from his stool. It was only when his peds met the floor with an audible thud that he realized that they were still in the crowded bar. Swerve’s was once more dead quiet and optics of all colors and shapes were on them. 

“Well, it’s about slagging time.”

Ratchet rolled his optics from where he sat beside a nonplussed Cyclonus. The medic tipped his tankard back and finished his drink before making his way toward the pair at the bar. Everyone’s attention was on the notoriously grumpy mech as he finally came to a stop in front of Ultra Magnus. “I will kill you myself if you hurt him, medical pledges be slagged.”

The SIC surprised himself by being a little intimidated by the former CMO. “Understood, Ratchet.”

Grumbling, the old medic left without another word and the room fell into a muddle of shouted congratulations and questions. Up on the bar, a sullen Swerve pushed a few credits to Tailgate who was still muttering “I knew it! See? I told you, Cy!” 

Rodimus turned his face up to flash a bright smile up at Ultra Magnus and the taller of the two returned it. Together, they wove their way out of Swerve’s, dodging bodies as the music took up again and the other bots began to dance. Already knowing that Magnus wasn’t a fan of the loud partying, Rodimus moved straight for the door without a backward glance. Ultra Magnus took the red mech’s hand in a gentle hold as they left the excitement of the bar behind them.


	24. Chapter 24

When Rodimus signed the datapad that would banish Megatron from the Lost Light, he was glad that Ultra Magnus never once left his side. The ex-warlord, even with his comm. silenced, was still an intimidating presence in the room. Megatron came in like a dark cloud that could not be ignored and it took all of the young prime’s self-control to not allow himself a glance at his former abuser. 

The jury stayed absolutely silent as Megatron was seated. No one so much as moved as Rodimus was presented the datapad by his SIC and the red mech began to review the charges one final time. As much as he wanted to simply sign and dash, Rodimus knew that Ultra Magnus would want him to at least give the datapad a cursory glance.

But concentrating was difficult for the young prime. He could feel Megatron’s gaze on him and the loathing that permeated the silver ex-warlord’s field. As he took the datapad and stylus into his hand, Rodimus couldn’t stop the persistent shake that had taken up in his chassis. “Slag it to the Pit-“

“Calm yourself, captain.” Though his voice was curt in the makeshift courtroom, Ultra Magnus’ field encased the red speedster, shielding him from anything that might come from Megatron’s direction. 

With Ultra Magnus pressing at his back, Rodimus was able to sign the datapad clearly enough. But before he could turn to leave, his carefully crafted control broke. He looked across the room.

The ex-warlord stood with his hands pinioned in front of himself, optics alert. He was already looking at Rodimus as the prime stopped moving toward the door. The young prime couldn’t help but notice the silver mech’s repaired nasal bridge as they connected optics with each other. 

Even though he knew that he owed Megatron nothing at all, Rodimus had sent Ratchet down to repair his former co-captain’s olfactory sensors and provide any pain dampeners if they were needed. The look on the medic’s face when the prime had given him the orders was still clear in Rodimus’ mind, but he’d ultimately been unable to explain his decision. Megatron had caused him nothing but pain. His daily sessions with Rung had revealed as much to him over time. 

But one thing that the little psychiatrist had said stuck with Rodimus particularly well. It had prodded him to send Ratchet down to help Megatron. Rung had told him to be a lighthouse. As weird as the comparison was, Rodimus thought that a lighthouse would probably send a doctor to fix it’s ex’s broken nose, a broken nose that was caused by said lighthouse’s new boyfriend.

“Rodimus-“

“I’m okay, Mags. Could I have a minute alone with him?”

The former Enforcer considered his captain’s request momentarily. “With respect, sir, are you sure that it is wise?”

“I have to.” Rodimus looked up and saw the genuine worry in his intended’s gaze. He wasn’t sure why, but the red mech knew that he needed a moment alone with Megatron.

Ultra Magnus went about clearing the jury and other attending bots from the room. Even Rewind, who’d been in charge of documenting the proceedings up until that point, left along with the rest of them. As the rest of them exited the room, Rodimus never took his attention off of the silver mech.

“Everyone has been removed, sir.”

“Thank you, Ultra Magnus.”

Rodimus finally took his gaze off of the ex-warlord when his SIC nudged his arm slightly. The bigger mech’s field swirled with distress at the prospect of leaving the young prime alone with the mech who had nearly killed him more than once. “I will be immediately outside the door.”

The red speedster made sure that Megatron could see as he stood on tiptoe and pulled down the blue mech to brush his mouth across the taller bot’s. Ultra Magnus froze for a moment before he reached to draw a light hand across his intended’s spoiler. 

When Rodimus dropped back to stand flat on his peds, the huge blue mech actually chased his retreating lips for a moment before collecting himself and quickly making his way to the door. Before he left, however, Ultra Magnus sent a flat stare in Megatron’s direction. 

The ex-warlord didn’t flinch at the unspoken threat and watched until the door closed behind the former Enforcer. “He seems to be well under your spell, little prime.”  
“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Megatron rolled massive shoulders and wiggled his wrists in the stasis cuffs. “It would appear that the fool Magnus has fallen for your little act, prime. I hear that he’s rather inexperienced when it comes to berth matters, the poor slagger. He has no idea about you does he? Pretending that you’re something you’re not.”

“The only one who fell for anything was me. It was my fault for thinking that you cared for me at all.” Rodimus thought of Rung’s voice in his processor and used the soothing tones to calm himself down. “Why did you do those things to me?” When Megatron didn’t move to answer, the young prime stepped forward. “Do you even think it was wrong?”

“You needed to be put in your place.”

“And what is my place, Megatron?”

The silver mech smirked and, even though Megatron was the one in cuffs, Rodimus felt like he was the mech being trapped. “You belong in the gutters, servicing bots for money and fuel. You have proven again and again that you are unworthy to be the captain of this ship. After all, Optimus himself sent me to make sure that you don’t get them all killed.” The ex-warlord released a deep laugh that made Rodimus jump. “And what will happen to them now that I’m leaving? You’ll get them all deactivated, little prime, just like you got everyone in Nyon killed.”

Rodimus remained still for several kliks, unable to move under the weight that had settled in his spark. When he finally did move, it was slowly, as if he carried all of his failings on his shoulders. “Maybe that is what I deserve, Megatron. Maybe I’m not a leader and I’m not worthy of these bots in my charge. Primus knows how rash and overconfident and excitable I can be, but you know what? I’ve never done any of those things for personal gain or for glory. I didn’t watch Nyon burn because I wanted to. Do you know how you and I are different? I will be remembered for trying to do better and if I can’t be remembered for that, then I’d rather not be remembered at all. You? You had a chance to change how you would be remembered. Instead of bettering yourself, you just got better at keeping your wrongs secret.

“And maybe I’m not a perfect leader. I’m not Optimus Prime or even you. No, I’m the mech you tried to kill and the Matrix _saved me _. I didn’t ask for this job, but I’ve damn well tried to do my best by every mech and femme in my crew. And it is MY crew.”__

__Rodimus spun on a ped and made his way over to the door. Before he could open it though, he turned one last time to face his former co-captain. “Oh, and don’t ever talk about Ultra Magnus that way again. That’s my intended and I won’t tolerate you talking about him that way in my presence.”_ _

__With that, the young prime flung open the door and stalked past the bots outside. There was no doubt that they’d all heard at least his side of the conversation as they stared after him._ _

__His spark felt like it was about to explode as the speedster lengthened his strides down the hallway. Fear warred with pride in his chest at having stood up to Megatron face to face. Rodimus could feel his tanks twisting violently with nervous energy and he felt lightheaded. All he wanted to do was escape the vision of scarlet optics that had taken up residence in his helm._ _

__“Rodimus.”_ _

__The red mech had begun trembling violently upon leaving the room and barely heard the voice behind him. He only stopped when a hand caught his arm. “Look, I’m sorry, Mags, I shouldn’t have sent you guys out-“_ _

__He found himself abruptly silenced as an insistent mouth collided with his own._ _

__The speedster had no time to react before the owner of the mouth pulled back far too quickly. “I apologize, captain, I didn’t mean to interrupt you, I just-“ Rodimus looked up at Ultra Magnus and his processor nearly stalled when he saw tears in the other mech’s optics. “You did not have to defend me, but I am otherwise proud of you for confronting him.”_ _

__“You’ve defended me more than once. I guess I’m on my way to getting even, huh?”_ _

__Ultra Magnus moved to plant another kiss against the center of Rodimus’ forehelm. “Perhaps there are better ways of achieving that goal?”_ _

__Rodimus, far calmer than he had been moments earlier, relaxed as he was pulled against the bigger mech’s chest. “I’m listening.”_ _

__“I would like to have you over for dinner and a movie, if that appeals to you?”_ _

__A hint of familiar teasing returned to the speedster’s field. “As much as I’d love to, documentaries aren’t really my thing.”_ _

__A chuckle came from deep in the former Enforcer’s chest. “Perhaps I will choose the course and you should pick the movie, hm? I would not be opposed to watching one of your Earth-movies.”_ _

__The young prime sent himself a reminder for later to thank Drift. Who else would’ve told Magnus about his weakness for Earth-movies? Rodimus nodded excitedly and slipped his arm into the crook of the larger mech’s. “When should I come over?”_ _


	25. Chapter 25

Rodimus was a ball of nervous energy when he finally made it back to his hab. Once there, he commed Drift, speaking so quickly that the swordsmech barely understood what was going on before Rodimus hung up.

Initially, upon finding himself alone after his confrontation with Megatron, the young prime sat heavily on his berth. He tried to process everything that he’d said and busily reviewed the things that the ex-warlord had said to him. Though it didn’t hurt as much as it once did, Megatron’s words still struck him like fist blows to the top of his helm. It wasn’t too long before his excitement to meet Ultra Magnus turned into tightly wound nausea in his tanks.

Was Megatron right? Was the fragging the only thing that made him worth anything? Magnus certainly didn’t seem to think so… or was the mech just being polite? What if the SIC truthfully found him repulsive and didn’t want to touch him, just like Megatron said?

It was with such panic building in his spark that Drift found him. The white speedster seemed to already know what was going on as he virtually wrapped himself around his amica. Drift purred quietly as he allowed his skillful hands to wonder over Rodimus tightly clamped armor. “Relax, babe. Mags knows you’re more than whatever Megatron says you are. Give him some credit, yeah?”

“What if- what if he really doesn’t want to touch me that way? Megatron said-“

“A lot of slag. We’ve all seen the way Magnus looks at you. It’s like you’re the only mech that exists to him.”

Rodimus snorted and pulled away from Drift to go to his vanity. “Megatron says he’s inexperienced or whatever. Do you think that’s why he wants to wait? He’s nervous or something?”

Drift plucked the jar of polish that Rodimus had selected from his collection. “I think Magnus wants to wait until you’re ready for something as serious as that again.   
He doesn’t seem like the kind of mech that frags casually.”

Holding out a cleaning rag, the prime breathed a sigh. “I know. I’m just not used to doing it this way and it makes me feel like I’ll mess up before I get the chance to show him how I feel.”

“There’s plenty for ways to show you care besides fragging. Just let it take its course. And don’t let what Megatron said come between you two.” With talented fingers, Drift began to smooth the polish onto the other speedster’s spoiler with broad strokes.

“I’m just so confused with all of this, Drift. I want to do it right this time. I want this so bad.”

The white mech leaned around until he could look his amica in the optics. “You want to do it right? Then just be yourself. The real you is the best you, that’s what Ratch used to tell me.”

Rodimus considered the words for moment before sighing and leaning into his friend’s careful touch. Drift paused his polishing to nuzzle at the back of the other speedster’s neck. “It’ll be alright, sweetspark. I know he’s a good mech. He’d never do anything to hurt you. If he did, Ratchet and I would kill him.”

The young prime said nothing as his amica resumed applying the polish to his armor. Even though Drift meant well, his TIC’s words barely took the edge off of the swirling turmoil that resided in his spark. The pressure to be better still pushed against him on all sides, telling him that he wasn’t good enough. That he wasn’t worthy of a mech like the former Duly Appointed Enforcer of the Tyrest Accord. Rodimus didn’t find himself good company, didn’t think he was overly intelligent or responsible. Sure, bots said he was hot. But rather than that-

“You’re overthinking, I can almost hear the gears turning in your processor.”

Rodimus looked in the mirror and gave his amica a half-sparked smile. “Megatron said all that stuff. I gotta keep reminding myself of that.”

“I know it’s not easy. When Ratchet first started courting me, I thought someone had put him up to it.” The former buymech coughed to clear his vocalizer, but never once faltered in his polishing. “You think he deserves better because of your past. You don’t think you’re allowed to be happy after all the things you’ve done or because of who someone else said you were.”

The prime’s voice was a hoarse whisper. “How did you get past it?”

“I accepted what happened, but not other bots’ opinions. Ratch still has to remind me sometimes, but it’s gotten easier.”

“I just hope it doesn’t ruin my chance with him.”

Drift gave him a sympathetic look as he passed over Rodimus’ plating once more with the rag before drawing away. “All done! You look beautiful, Roddy. ”

“Thanks, Drift.” A reminder buzzed on the red speedster’s HUD. It was time to head to Ultra Magnus’ habsuite. The red speedster dragged in a steadying sigh and leaned forward to pull his friend into a tight embrace. “I mean it. Thank you for this and everything else.”

“I love you,” Drift squeezed the red speedster back before he pulled away. “Just have fun and don’t worry. Everything’s okay in the end. If it’s not okay, then it’s not the end, right?”

“Primus, Drift, you gotta be so intense?”

“I know, I know. Just be yourself.”

“I’ll try. Love you, too, Drift.”


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Suuuper long chapter, I hope it's worth the little wait!

Rodimus stood outside the habsuite door, daring himself to comm. and be let in.

Why was he so nervous? It wasn’t even the first date! The young prime shuffled his peds as he glared at the door in front of himself. Meagtron’s voice had continued to intrude on his thoughts ever since he’d seen him face to face earlier in the cycle. A litany of questions repeated themselves through Rodimus’ processor, rapidly overwhelming him as he stood in the empty hallway.

Before he had a chance to gather his courage, the door cued open.

“Mags! Hey, I was just-“

There was no one there. Rodimus found himself staring up into open space.

A cleared throat had him jerking chin down to meet the gaze of the mech in front of him. Minimus stood just inside the door, hands clasped behind his back as he regarded his visitor with amusement. “You were just…?”

“Nothing! Nothing. H-How are you?”

The facial insignia of the shorter mech twitched as he smiled slightly. “I am well. Are you coming in?”

“Oh, yeah. Yeah, I am.”

Rodimus stepped through the door and heard it shut behind himself. 

The majority of Magnus’ hab was fashioned similarly to the captain’s suite, but on a smaller, less elegant scale. There was little personalization and color among the plain furniture and walls.. There was a private wash rack to the back and a berthroom off to the side, door closed. The main living space was functional, but altogether largely basic in design plain. 

A large couch sat in the center, facing a large wall-mounted screen. Based on the relative bland feel of the hab, Rodimus was surprised by the soft blanket that was draped over the back of said couch. It was almost too bright for its surroundings, an inviting scarlet thing made of fine-fiber threading. Even at the distance he stood, the gold-accented mech could see that it was expensive in make.

“If you’ll take a seat, I can bring over our fuel shortly.”

“Should I help you?” Rodimus tore his gaze away from the inviting couch as he asked the question.

A single look from Minimus told the prime that he definitely didn’t need help. “I assure you, I am quite capable on my own.”

Minimus voice was cold. Sensing that he’d already messed up, Rodimus scurried to follow the green bot’s gesture toward the table. 

When he finally seated himself, the prime had to sit on his hands to keep himself still. He hadn’t meant to insult Minimus by any means. Rodimus swallowed hard and focused on keeping his field in check. What if the smaller mech thought he was making fun of his size? What if Minimus decided that a clumsy, insensitive mech like him wasn’t worth it? What if-

Gingerly, Minimus placed the red mech’s plate in front of him. “I apologize for snapping at you, Rodimus. I am unused to being in my irreducible form and not receiving… comments on my size.” The ruby-opticed mech took his place in the chair opposite Rodimus. “It does not by any means excuse my behavior, but I hope that you will forgive me all the same.”

Rodimus gave him a thin smile. “It’s all good. I didn’t mean to upset you-“

The smell of the fuel reached his olfactory sensors then and Rodimus looked down. He froze at what he saw. “Minimus,” the prime breathed, staring at the creation on his plate, “how did you do this?”

It was a traditional Nyonian dish, a delicacy that Rodimus hadn’t seen since before the war. He marveled at the carefully constructed energon and felt his throat constrict slightly. Where had the little green bot even gotten the recipe?

“I hope that it is satisfactory. I’ve never made this particular meal and thought you might enjoy it.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

Minimus took his utensil in hand and carefully took up a piece from his plate. The energon, set up into a jello-like consistency, jiggled where it was balanced on the utensil as he lifted it to his mouth. “Perhaps you should wait until after you try it.”

Rodimus balanced his own piece of jellied energon on his utensil and marveled at the perfect glow it had. Minimus had even added Rodimus’ favorite shavings and flavor additives. Just as he expected it would, the treat melted in his mouth and, unable to stop himself in time, Rodimus moaned at the taste.

Rodimus’ felt a blush color his cheeks. “Mims, this is _amazing _. How did you know? Even the extra bits are prefect!”__

__A knowing look crossed the slight mech’s face. “I might’ve searched out Drift’s council on this aspect of our date as well.”_ _

__“You really had this planned out, didn’t you?”_ _

__“Indeed I did. I enjoy seeing you happy, Rodimus.”_ _

__The red speedster felt pressure build behind his optics and he refocused his attention on the diligently prepared meal before him. He’d promised himself that he wouldn’t compare, but he couldn’t help but remember that Megatron had never once done something so thoughtful for him. As he continued eating, Rodimus was still trying to process how he’d come upon someone so considerate._ _

__Minimus finished his plate at about the same time as Rodimus did. Sharp orbs of red studied the speedster intently. “Did it turn out correctly?”  
“Are you kidding? This was amazing! Your date definitely beat mine.”_ _

__“It wasn’t a competition, my prime. To be with you, no matter where, is to win in my optics.”_ _

__Again, Rodimus felt his neck cables tighten and he couldn’t resist the question. “You really do like me don’t you, Mims?”_ _

__Uncertainty entered the other mech’s field and his optics narrowed. “Have I not made my intents clear?”_ _

__“No, not that, it’s just… I’m having trouble believing this is real.” The captain squirmed a little in his seat, pinned in place by Minimus’ intense scrutiny. “I’ve liked you for a while now and I never thought that- I never-“_ _

__“Why do you feel that you are not allowed to be happy?”_ _

__Why did Rodimus believe that he wasn’t allowed to be happy? How could he answer that question? If he did, would it scare the green mech away? How had Minimus known to ask it; was he that easy to read?_ _

__Rodimus didn’t have time to think about it for long though as Minimus moved to stand. “There is a wide selection of Earth-movies provided by Swerve and Rewind near the couch. Why don’t you choose one while I set these aside?”_ _

__Rodimus rose from his seat with his plate in hand. When the green mech opened his mouth to stop him, the prime beat him to it. “I know you can get it, but I want to help you. It- It makes accepting all of this easier for me.”_ _

__Minimus hadn’t expected such candid words from the red mech and allowed Rodimus to help him clean the plates away. Together, the pair finished tidying up before  
Rodimus looked over to the ever inviting couch. The scarlet throw looked so tempting and he wanted badly to cuddle up underneath it._ _

__When he had been a mechling in Nyon, he’d never had the chance to own something so glorious. Drift’s hab on the Lost Light was always a treat to visit as the swordsmech routinely filled his quarters with all the soft, plush pillows and covers that he could find. Rodimus loved to bury himself in the satiny wonderfulness, submerging himself in all the things that he’d dreamed of back when he’d only had his arm for a pillow and the gutter as his berth._ _

__Though Rodimus was capable of purchasing such things for his own hab now, he couldn’t bring himself to do so. Truly, he was ashamed of liking the items, ashamed of the comfort they brought him. No matter how much he wanted to, Rodimus continued to punish himself for some kind of lingering guilt without even being aware that he was doing so._ _

__“Rodimus?” The prime was jolted from his memory to find the green mech looking up at him. Though he didn’t wear the Magnus armor, the bot still carried himself with an intense air that demanded respect. “Is this alright?”_ _

__“Is what alright?”_ _

__“Watching a movie. On the couch.”_ _

__The red speedster realized then that he’d been staring at the luxurious throw with trepidation. Megatron had a few such things in his old hab, now vacant since he would be transported back to Cybertron. Rodimus had never been allowed to curl up on the blankets in Megatron’s quarters. “Can I…?”_ _

__Minimus seemed to suddenly understand what the prime meant and took his hand. “Shall we?”_ _

__Dumbly, Rodimus followed the smaller mech to the couch. He sank down onto it slowly at first before fully allowing himself to sprawl out on it. The cushions were over stuffed and reminded the prime of Earth-couches, bulky things that gave when one sat down on them. Rodimus allowed himself a moment to relax before he looked over at his host. “So what do you wanna watch?”_ _

__The green mech settled himself on the other end of the couch, far enough that he could give Rodimus space, but close enough to touch if the prime initiated it. “I believe that we agreed that the choice is yours.”_ _

__“Hmmm. Okay, but you have to at least pick the genre then.”_ _

__Minimus’ bit his lower lip as he thought and Rodimus had a sudden all-consuming urge to kiss the other mech long and hard. He barely managed to shake off the impulse before the former Enforcer looked over at him. “Perhaps romance is appropriate?”_ _

__“Sounds good to me!” Rodimus enthusiastically went about flipping through the Earth-movies in the Romance category on the screen. Though he was genuinely trying to find one, the prime couldn’t help but watch the green bot out the corner of his optic._ _

__Minimus watched the titles flash by as Rodimus flicked through them, never settling on one or very long. The green bot felt too warm and found himself unable to read the titles that he did have time to notice. He’d sat a safe distance from the other mech, trying to give Rodimus space to move freely. Minimus rebooted his vocalizer. “Have you chosen a movie yet?”_ _

__“What?”_ _

__Rodimus looked over at him then, optics hazy. The young prime’s lips were parted slightly and his field brushed tentatively against Minimus’ own. It was full of _calm-happy-excited _, but underneath the surface were different emotions. Beneath all of those, Minimus found _arousal-desire-nervousness _-_____ _

______“How about this one?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Minimus didn’t even look at the screen as he nodded. “A good choice.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______The open scene began to play and Rodimus barely heard a word of it. He forced himself to sit quietly even as he constantly tried to catch a glimpse of the other mech’s field. From what he could tell, Minimus was completely vested in the movie he’d chosen and part of Rodimus wished that he’d picked a more boring storyline._ _ _ _ _ _

______Minimus could barely contain himself. Somehow, he managed to keep his optics on the screen, even as Rodimus moved to brush his golden hand against the former Enforcer’s smaller green one. The touch alone sent a thrill through his powerful little spark and it took all of Minimus’ carefully constructed self-control not to react._ _ _ _ _ _

______The movie dragged on and Rodimus moved his fingers until they covered Minimus’ more fully. Minimus couldn’t resist looking over at last, unable to stop himself._ _ _ _ _ _

______The young prime was already staring at him, optics ablaze with electricity. Rodimus was watching him with an intensity that the red mech rarely gave to anything. “Mims?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Yes?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Can I kiss you? Please?”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Please.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______Instead of moving quickly like the green mech thought he would, Rodimus moved ever so slowly as he approached Minimus’ side of the couch. The prime crawled and his movements reminded the smaller bot of some kind of predator. As the beautiful speedster hovered over him, Minimus would’ve never guessed that being prey could feel so arousing._ _ _ _ _ _

______And then Rodimus was kissing him. The former Enforcer felt himself pressed down into the couch as the other mech leaned over him. The speedster’s mouth was as soft as ever, even better than when Minimus kissed him in the Magnus armor. Rodimus’ glossa flicked out and Minimus couldn’t help but let him in._ _ _ _ _ _

______As Rodimus deepened the kiss, he felt familiar heat settling low in his belly. Usually such a feeling was accompanied by intense fear and the expectation of pain. But there were none of those things as the young prime allowed himself to take control of the kiss and lick his way into the smaller mech’s mouth. When he heard Minimus’ responding moan, it took all of Rodimus’ remaining willpower to pull away. “Mims…”_ _ _ _ _ _

______When the red mech spoke, it was like a switch went off in Minimus processor. Immediately, his optics flew wide, almost blinding the other mech in their intensity. “No.  
Not-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______Rodimus was up and away immediately, scooting back to his side of the couch. “Primus, Minimus, I’m so sorry-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______The smaller of the two shook his helm, trying desperately to draw air evenly through his intake. “It’s fine.”_ _ _ _ _ _

______“-I didn’t mean to push you-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______“Captain-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______“-I’ll go, I know you want to wait-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______“ _Rodimus _.” The red speedster finally stilled enough so that Minimus could catch his optic. The green mech sat up until he could face the other on the couch.  
When Rodimus had finally calmed somewhat and didn’t look like he was about to bolt from the room, Minimus reached to stroke a hand across the other mech’s finial in a calming gesture. “It is true that I want to wait. I would like for us to spend more time together before discussing such a thing as interfacing.”___ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yeah, I know and I’m sorry-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Minimus lay a light fingertip over the other mech’s mouth to silence him. Leaning forward slowly, the small green mech replaced his digit with his lips. He kept the kiss chaste and noticed that Rodimus barely moved until Minimus pulled back and away. “I care for you deeply, Rodimus. Perhaps we got a little… heated a few moments ago. I don’t mind doing other things, but interfacing is something I would like to wait for.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The red speedster’s spoiler shot up. “You mean… we can do other things?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yes. I would like to share such acts with you.” Minimus optics dilated out of focus for a moment before he looked back up at his guest. “However, I do believe that tonight is not the right time for such activity. According to my HUD, I should be on my way to the bridge soon.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Rodimus sat back on his heels, disappointment radiating from his field. “Really? I didn’t think you had next shift.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Minumus rocked up onto his peds and made his way over toward one of his side rooms. “Usually, I would not. But this cycle is the one during which I will oversee the induction of stasis on Megatron.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The young prime fidgeted with the fringe on the throw blanket at the green mech opened the door to the side room and went inside. Though he knew that his presence wasn’t required, Rodimus couldn’t help but feel like he should be there. “I think I should come with you.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________A thud sounded from the room into which Minimus entered. “Excuse me?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I just… maybe it will help me get on with my life. Drift is always talking about closing chapters and opening doors and slag, so maybe it will give me what I need to move on.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Do you refer to closure?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Yes! That.” Another crash had Rodimus scrambling to his feet. “Mims? You okay?” When the smaller mech didn’t answer right away, he made his way quickly toward the door._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Before he could look inside, he found himself submerged in shadow as a mech far taller than himself moved out into the main room. Ultra Magnus ducked under the door frame and towered over the young prime. “Indeed. It is never an easy process.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Oh! Hey. I gotta get used to that.” Rodimus looked the bigger bot up and down for a moment. “Do you think I can go? Ratchet didn’t clear me for duty yet, but it’s not duty if I just watch, right?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Ultra Magnus stood above him for a few kliks before averting his gaze. “It is not for me to decide, Rodimus. Based on prior incidences…”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________When the blue mech faltered, Rodimus dared to reach forward and rest his hand on the other’s arm. “If you don’t think it’s a good idea, then I’ll go back to my hab. I asked you because I wanted an honest answer.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I would rather you be as far away from him as possible.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Rodimus offered a muted smile up at his SIC. “Okay then. I’ll see you later?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Rodimus, if you would rather wait for me here, I would return shortly.” When the prime gave him a quizzical look, Ultra Magnus continued. As he spoke, he bent to kiss Rodimus’ cheek. “I don’t want you to feel that you must leave simply because I am. You are always welcome here.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The former Enforcer felt his spark jump when Rodimus looked up at him with adoring optics. “Sure. I think I’ll stay here then if that’s okay.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________A second soft kiss landed on the prime’s opposite cheek. “Feel free to make yourself comfortable. Also-“ Ultra Magnus produced a package from his subspace. “Perhaps you can put this to good use until I return.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“What’s this?” Rodimus took the package into his grip. It was a box, wrapped in plain navy paper._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“It is a courting gift.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“But-But I don’t have anything for you?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Ultra Magnus extended his field to mold against Rodimus’. “I do not expect anything from you, little prime.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Rodimus went about sitting back on the couch. His fingers fluttered with excitement as he took hold of the lid. With a steadying breath and a glance at Magnus, he lifted it away._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________It was stunning. As Rodimus pulled the light-weight yet sturdy blanket from the box, his vents stalled at the sight of the material. It shimmered brilliantly in his hands, spilling across his arm like some kind of cloth waterfall. And it was the right color too. Sapphire threads were interwoven with aquamarine, all flowing and fading together with the barest traces of silver._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The throw pooled about Rodimus on the couch and he couldn’t help but gasp through his vents. Nearby Ultra Magnus heard the sound and, misunderstanding, moved to the young prime’s side. “Rodimus?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Oh, Mags,” The prime finally met the other mech’s optics, his blue ones fever bright. “I love this. It’s perfect.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Relief colored Magnus’ field as Rodimus continued to play with the blanket in his arms. “I am glad that you like it.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The red mech held the blanket to his face and purred as he relished in the expensive material. “I don’t know how I’ll ever find something for you. This is amazing-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Do not worry about getting something for me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Ultra Magnus left soon after, giving the captain a slow, deep kiss before he departed. It left Rodimus staring after him long after the door had closed over the blue mech’s back._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Gathering his new blanket around himself, Rodimus made a nest for himself on the couch in the main living area. As he did, he selected a movie he’d seen several times with Drift if only to give him the illusion of not being alone. Surrounded by the scent of the hab’s occupant and swaddled in a speedster-burrito, Rodimus slowly floated off into a heavy recharge._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	27. Chapter 27

Megatron stood quietly enough in the medbay as Ultra Magnus reviewed the charges one final time. It was more of a formality really. Everyone who’d showed up to witness the stasis induction knew what Megatron had done to their captain.

“Do you have anything to say before the sentencing is carried out.” Ultra Magnus kept his optics hard as he stared down the ex-warlord. After what he’d witnessed, it was easy to forget that Megatron had at one time been his friend and confidant. The blue mech felt a fresh wave of protectiveness for his smaller intended as he waited for the silver mech to speak.

As if projecting to a large crowd back in the gladiatorial arenas, Megatron cleared his vocalizer. “It is known that I have always done my best to guide and direct the crew on this ship. I have attempted to conduct myself in a manner that ensures the survival of those under my care.”

Ultra Magnus fought to stay still as the ex-warlord continued to declare his “undying loyalty” to those in his charge. At his core, the hot point one percenter spark spun quickly with barely concealed rage. The only thing that kept him from speaking out of turn was the fact that he had duties to carry out, duties that allowed Megatron to say his piece whether it was true or not.

“Furthermore, I pray for the future of this ship. I have no doubt that you shall all find the knights you seek and the justice that you deserve.”

Megatron turned to give Ultra Magnus a fanged smirk and the former Enforcer somehow managed to keep his face straight. They connected optics for a brief moment and Magnus knew then that Megatron would never be sorry for his actions against Rodimus. Magnus resisted the urge to roll the tension from his shoulders. “Megatron of Tarn, you will now be placed in stasis lock until the Lost Light is able to return to Cybertron. First Aid, the Chief Medical Officer of the Lost Light, shall carry out the sentencing before these witnesses gathered.”

Ultra Magnus observed as the sentence was carried out. He watched as Megatron’s optics faded from defiant red to empty black when First Aid sedated the ex-warlord on the medberth. The former Enforcer then realized how tense he’d been when Megatron’s chassis fell limp at last. Only the pale glow of an ill-bonded spark indicated that the silver mech was still alive at all as First Aid opened the chest plates to run a quick diagnostic and finalize the stasis lock process.

When it was done, Ultra Magnus left the medbay on shaking legs. He sent a quick comm. to Drift on the bridge that the procedure was done and made his way quickly toward to his own hab.

 

~o0o~

 

Ultra Magnus opened the door to his hab and crept inside. Rodimus lay on the couch, enveloped in the blanket and deep in recharge. As he made his way further into the room, the blue mech was able to silently study the resting form of the speedster before him.

Rodimus’ spoiler barely peeked out from the blankets, twitching occasionally as the red speedster dreamed. A small mouth puckered slightly and the tips of golden fingers could be seen gripping the edge of the blue throw. The young prime appeared to be slumbering peacefully and Magnus had to resist the urge to pull Rodimus into his arms.

As quietly as he was able, Ultra Magnus made his way to the energon dispenser. He poured himself a cube, always keeping an optic on the couch’s occupant as he stirred in his desired additives. He couldn’t help but replay the scene he’d come upon in that closet, when he’d discovered the truth of Megatron’s abuse. It felt like so long ago as he sipped at his fuel.

He’d felt unparalleled rage when he’d broken down the door to that closet. Magnus had been the one to hear the thuds from Rung’s office and he’d been the first one into the room itself. The former Enforcer remembered crashing through the door just in time to see Megatron’s hand hoist Rodimus up by the neck.

Ultra Magnus had felt his spark stop as he saw the little prime’s optics roll up into his helm.Rodimus’ mouth had bubbled energon as his fuel lines were severed and crumpled. They’d been lucky to have Ratchet with them or else the speedster would’ve sucked the half-processed energon into his intakes and drowned. Fortunately, the medic had been able to stabilize Rodimus on the way to the medbay.

The feeling of carrying a dying comrade in his arms was a feeling that Ultra Magnus had felt many times before. The war had taken many good mechs and femmes as they lay in the deatyh bed that was Magnus’ embrace. But holding the young prime-

“Mags?”

The former Enforcer jumped. He lifted his concentrated gaze from his half-empty cube to find a sleepy Rodimus looking at him from the couch. The prime’s spoiler was lopsided as he sat up further and he rubbed a fist into his optic to clear it. “Sorry, didn’t mean to fall into such a deep recharge there. How long you been back?”

“Not too long. How are you feeling?”

“Pretty good. Little stiff, but good.” The prime paused for a moment. “How’d it go?”

Ultra Magnus finished his cube and dispersed it before standing to make his way toward the couch. “It went as smoothly as such a thing can go.” He sat down beside his intended. “Megatron has been placed under stasis lock successfully under the supervision of First Aid. He felt no pain or discomfort.”

“Good.”

They sat silently for a few kliks. Rodimus’ attention wandered about the room, never settling on one thing for too long. Magnus silently reached forward to take one of the prime’s smaller one in his own. 

A gentle kiss lit on his cheek, starting a fire in the larger bot’s spark.

When Rodimus drew back to look up at him, Magnus could tell that the prime felt his reaction to the kiss. The former Enforcer froze for a moment, not expecting the reaction that such an innocent gesture provoked. Rodimus suddenly pushed himself up from where he sat to shift over onto the blue mech’s side of the couch.

Rodimus straddled the bigger mech’s waist, reaching up to pull the former Enforcer down into a soft kiss. Ultra Magnus found himself immobile as insistent denta teased his mouth, relentless in their mission to get a further reaction from the blue mech. 

By the time Ultra Magnus was able to recover from his surprise, Rodimus was pulling back. “Too much?” When Magnus didn’t immediately answer, the red speedster began scrambling out of the other mech’s lap. “Listen, I didn’t mean to push again, I just really-“

Rodimus felt his helm tipped back by a single fingertip pressed on the underside of his chin. Before he could react to the movement, the red mech froze as something wet dragged up his neck cables. Rodimus felt himself swallow haltingly at the sensation before he abruptly understood what was happening. Ultra Magnus was licking at his fuel lines.

Then bigger mech laved his glossa against the sensitive cables, savoring the little moans he pulled from the speedster’s vocalizer. Rodimus began to trembling slightly in his arms, chassis rattling as he fought to keep still. 

“Rodimus’?”

“Y-yes?”

Ultra Magnus’ whispered against the now slick cables, his breath ghosting over the moisture and leaving a chill. “May I pleasure you with my mouth?”

At the sound of Magnus’ question, enunciated in a low half-growl, Rodimus felt a rush of lubricant flood his valve. Megatron had never done such a thing. It had been so long since he’d had anyone to do something so intimate, so personal. “Um-“

The bigger mech pulled back to carefully study the prime. “We do not have to do anything that makes you uncomfortable.”

“I want to, I do, I’m just nervous.”

“How can I help you relax?”

Rodimus wiggled his hips a little as he bent to rest his face against Magnus’ chest. “I don’t know, Mags. I’m messed up and you-“ “ _No. _” The young prime raised his head as the blue mech continued to speak. “You are far from ‘messed up’, Rodimus. You have been subjected to serious trauma. Recovery from what you experienced is a process.” Ultra Magnus projected sincerity into his field as his voice dropped to a mere whisper. “I will do everything in my power to help you regain what you have lost, Rodimus. If you will allow me.”__

__Rodimus didn’t know what to say. Magnus was so patient, so understanding. Did he really deserve him?_ _

__“Rodimus?”_ _

__“Yeah, Mags?”_ _

__“May I touch you?”_ _

__“Please.”_ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I wrote this on the way home from a track meet because y'all are amazinggg


	28. Chapter 28

Ultra Magnus lay the smaller mech down on the couch, one hand splayed wide across Rodimus’ lower back. He moved slowly, aware of his larger stature, as he continued to deliver light touches to the smaller mech.

For all the captain’s usual confidence, Rodimus’ was blushing furiously as Ultra Magnus’ shadow stretched over him. He wanted badly to reach up and kiss his intended, but nervous energy kept him frozen in place. As the former Enforcer bent to suck at his neck again, the young prime felt his spark tremble in his chest. 

Something flicked in Rodimus field before he could pull it back in. Immediately, Ultra Magnus pulled away. “Rodimus?”

Looking embarrassed, the red mech cast a look to the side and way from the other mech. “Sorry.”

“Are you certain that you are comfortable?”

“Yeah, yeah. I just, um. I can’t believe you really want to do stuff like this. It doesn’t seem like your thing.”

The larger mech leaning in to lick up Rodimus’ sensitive finial. “My prime, there is no thing that I would rather be doing than proving your worth to me.”

“Even reading the Autobot Code again?”

There was no mistaking the teasing glimmer in the young prime’s optics. Ultra Magnus could tell by Rodimus’ field, however, that the young mech still had doubts as to his place in Magnus’ spark. “Even reading the Autobot Code again.”

With Rodimus still flustered, Magnus dipped to press his lips to the other mech’s in a bruising kiss. The prime reacted immediately, moaning low in his chassis as the blue mech lavished him with attention. After a few moments, Rodimus allowed the former Enforcer’s glossa to dance with his own.

Ultra Magnus began to feel the first stirrings in his lower body as he pinned the speedster’s hands on either side of his scarlet helm. The tightening in his array was accompanied by the familiar urge to grind down against the mech beneath him. He fought to resist the urge, reminding himself that he was far larger and stronger than Rodimus’ in the armor.

Pressed into the couch, surrounded by Magnus and the blankets, Rodimus was assaulted on all sides by senses that he’d always associated with pain and fear. His hands were both held in one of the blue mech’s above his helm, rendering the speedster almost completely immobile as the much larger bot pushed down on him from above. While it was deliciously arousing, the memory of Megatron doing something very similar to him time and time again threatened to dampen the feeling that had begun to settle in his lower belly.

Abruptly, Ultra Magnus released his hands.

“Shall we move to my berth?”

Relieved that the other mech hadn’t detected his distress, Rodimus nodded just in time for Magnus to lift himself off of the smaller mech. As the red speedster sat up, he took the hand extended to him and followed Ultra Magnus toward the closed berthroom door. 

Just like the rest of the hab, the berthroom was decorated sparingly. The berth, however, was far more luxurious than Rodimus expected to find in the quarters of one such as Ultra Magnus. Plump pillows and several layers of sheets adorned the berth, all placed neatly and with purpose. The prime found himself staring once more at the trappings before the blue mech’s voice interrupted him. 

“No interfacing.”

“Yeah. No interfacing. I know.”

Before Rodimus had a chance to feel disappointed or uncertain, large hands rested on his tapered waist. “Then shall we?”

Again, Rodimus was struck mute by the beauty that was Magnus’ optics. As he nodded his assent, the prime saw more emotion in the blue mech’s face than he’d ever seen on the bridge. For a mech as stoic as Ultra Magnus, the former Enforcer was crackling with electricity, his optics the warmest shade as he looked down at his smaller intended.

Taking the speedster’s slender hips in his hands, the former Enforcer easily shifted Rodimus until the prime sat on the edge of the berth

Rodimus stared at the mech who stood between his legs, a thrill running through his lines. Ultra Magnus never broke optic contact as he lowered himself down further and the young prime heard the blue mech’s knees creak as he settled down on the floor. “Mags, get off the floor, you don’t have to-“

The blue mech dipped his helm and proceeded to drag his glossa up the front of Rodimus’s closed panel, leaving a trail of heat where his oral lubricant touched. 

The red speedster felt himself tense involuntarily at the sensation as he tried desperately to find his voice. The effort proving futile, Rodimus settled for ogling at Magnus as the former Enforcer somehow wedged his glossa into the gaps of his hip plating to play with the wires in the joint. The act made the prime fall back flat on the berth and buck his hips weakly upward, optics flaring with pleasure. 

“Primus~”

After a moment, Magnus halted his ministrations to look up. “Open for me, Rodimus.”

His voice was as commanding as always and Rodimus knew that he’d never hear the blue mech’s voice again without remembering that moment. 

With a gasp and an audible hiss, the speedster’s panel snapped open. His spike pressurized immediately, so quickly that it verged on painful. Already, Rodimus’ valve gleamed with lubricant as it was bared to Ultra Magnus’ careful scrutiny.

Before the blue mech’s studying gaze could become uncomfortable, Magnus spoke. “Do you prefer your spike or your valve?”

The red mech hadn’t used his spike in what felt like millenia. He’d never been allowed to use his spike with Megatron. The ex-warlord always spiked him, whether he was properly prepared for it or not. 

“Um, my spike?”

With a hum of acknowledgement, Ultra Magnus bent to continue kissing at Rodimus’ inner thighs. The touches were so soft and cautious that the prime wouldn’t have been aroused by them at all if he hadn’t been watching the former Enforcer with avid attention.

And that glossa. The sight of it, slick with oral lubricant, gliding with practiced ease over his red plating, his biolights… Rodimus knew that he wouldn’t last long.

“Rodimus.” The blue mech had paused and was looking up at his intended, fixing Rodimus in place with a rare intensity in his gaze.

The prime blinked away the worst of the haze as he tried to focus on the other mech. “Y-yeah?”

“You are beautiful.” Magnus exvented across the red mech’s twitching spike as he whispered. “You are a work of art to be cherished and kept safe. I promise you that I will always endeavor to do so.”

Tears pricked Rodimus’ optics at the words and his vocalizer glitched, rendering him unable to speak. As the young prime fought to regain control of his emotions, Ultra Magnus massaged at his parted thighs, planting kisses every few inches apart.

When Rodimus finally could speak again, he spoke the first thing that came to his mind. “I think I kind of love you, Magnus.”

A quiet chuckle came from the end of the berth. Rodimus had no warning as Ultra Magnus took the red spike’s head into his mouth and began to suck.

The speedster choked for a moment as his hips spasmed. “Ahh~! Oh, Primus-“

And then that blue helm was bobbing up and down, so slowly that Rodimus felt the contrast distinctly between Magnus’ hot mouth and the cooler air. Immediately, a knot of arousal formed in the prime’s belly. Pressure built around his transfluid chamber and he sat up to support himself on his elbows.

Ultra Magnus watched his prime intently, lips wrapped around Rodimus’ pulsing spike. The speedster’s optics were glazed with pleasure as little puffs of steam escaped from his open vents. All heated up, the red mech was somehow even more stunningly gorgeous than usual. Little convulsive jerks of Rodimus’ hips told Magnus that the little prime was already close.

A comm. popped up on Rodimus’ HUD. :Optics on me, little prime.:

The endearment only served to push Rodimus’ pleasure higher. He struggled to keep his optics open and on the blue mech.   
“Mags, I’m gonna- oh, Mags-“

:I will catch you.:

Ultra Magnus took the spike to the hilt then, allowing the weeping head to butt up against the back of his throat. Quickly, he swallowed, rhythmically squeezing the spike’s head while massaging the base with his glossa tip.

The combination tore a ragged cry from Rodimus’ vocalizer. The speedster felt his lower torso tighten as his transfluid shot down the other mech’s throat. Ultra Mganus held the other’s hips down as the young prime rode out his overload, a constant low moan echoing from the smaller mech’s rebooting vocalizer.

Rodimus tasted so sweet as he came. Magnus, usually so strict and withdrawn, found himself sealing his mouth around the speedster’s swollen organ, greedy for more. He didn’t care about the mess on his berth as Rodimus’ valve continued to drip and he certainly didn’t care about whether or not he received anything in return. All that the former Enforcer cared about were the pure white points of light that were Rodimus’ optics as the red mech reached the height of his ecstasy.

Then, those brilliant optics suddenly went black. The rest of Rodimus’ frame fell loose and still as Magnus at last pulled his mouth away from the other mech’s array. The blue mech was worried for a moment before he recognized what had occurred. 

Rodimus had been forced into a full system reboot.

Ultra Magnus had only ever heard of such a thing. He watched as the red mech’s biolights flickered dimly back to life a few kliks later. Magnus himself had never experienced a hard reboot of his systems following an overload. Nor had he ever been the cause of such a thing for another mech before.

The lights that adorned Rodimus’ trim waist slowly regained their glow. Little flutters of the young prime’s fingers and peds told Ultra Magnus that the smaller mech would be coming around soon. The former Enforcer moved to lay alongside the prime on the berth, pulling Rodimus into his arms as the speedster’s fans clicked on. A ticking from the base of Rodimus’ neck started up, indicating that the vocalizer had indeed shorted out. 

Without coming fully online, a soft huff emanated from Rodimus’ vents. Ultra Magnus began to relax as he detected the strong pulse of the red mech’s spark through the plating pressed against his own. Settling down further, the former Enforcer surrounded the speedster and himself with copious amounts of pillows, creating a cozy nest for the pair of them. With a final check of his HUD and affirming that he didn’t have bridge duty for another shift yet, Ultra Magnus curled around the recharging prime in his berth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Why was that so hard to write?


	29. Chapter 29

Rodimus had never felt completely safe.

Before the war, back in Nyon, he’d had friends and a life. But he’d never been completely unafraid, completely at ease. There were always the dangers of the street. A mech had to be on his guard at all times back then.

The war had solidified that feeling of constant tension. Rodimus had been a Wrecker, one of the most elite of the Autobot forces. They’d always been chosen for most dangerous missions, specifically the ones where success was pretty much nonexistent. That life had forever changed the red speedster, resulting in his developing an inability to ever relax. He’d even developed nervous ticks as a result of the stress.

When the war had ended and he’d been given command of the Lost Light, Rodimus had thought things would calm down. They were on a mission, sure, but he wouldn’t have to worry about being stabbed in the back-

And then Megatron had arrived, like a hurricane. The young prime had been overtaken and overwhelmed by the ex-warlord, submitting willingly to Megatron’s advances. Rodimus hadn’t had much of a chance otherwise as he was showered with gifts and poetry and kisses early on.

Rodimus had almost been happy. Safe.

But the blows came, heavy and fast. Megatron had loosed a world of hate on the prime, blaming the smaller mech for all manner of things that were far out of Rodimus’ control. True, the red mech made some mistakes. But the ex-warlord had seemed convinced that the only way to teach Rodimus sense and leadership skills were to beat them into him.

Rodimus had never felt completely safe and had begun to believe that he didn’t deserve to.  
Emerging from one of deepest recharges that Rodimus could remember, the young prime found his processor foggy and sluggish. Surprisingly, he didn’t recall having any nightmares. Strange.

The speedster was first aware of the warmth that he was surrounded by. It was all around him, bathing his plating without restricting his movement. The young prime’s mouth felt dry and the base of his throat tight, like his vocalizer was trying to break free. When he tried to talk, all that came out was a quiet squeak.

“Easy, my prime.”

The voice came from all around him, rumbling under Rodimus’ cheek where he lay. The sound sent electricity arching across his plating and a dull ache to settle in his lower abdomen. That voice helped drag Rodimus’ from the lingering fog so that he could really focus on rebooting his vocalizer.

“Urrrrr- zzh-“

The voice was there again, this time accompanied by a hand, a hand large enough to cover Rodimus’ entire lower back as it stroked his spinal strut. “Give it time before you hurt yourself.”

Still impatient, the young prime struggled in the arms that held him. He felt disoriented. Though he hadn’t opened his optics yet, Rodimus could tell that he wasn’t in his own berth and he certainly wasn’t cuddling with Drift. The mech who held him so carefully was far bigger than him and no doubt stronger judging by the size of the arms that held him.

The memory files pinged and Rodimus opened them without hesitating.

Ultra Magnus, optics unusually bright. Rodimus’ own spike, pressurized into the air, leaking copiously with prefluid. The blue mech had gone down on him, had brought him to the most intense overload of his life. The prime faintly remembered screaming as his pleasure crested. After that, there had been nothing but the closing darkness.

Rodimus stopped fighting and managed to crack open one of his optics. 

Ultra Magnus’ broad chest was under his cheek, firm and the source of the heat that Rodimus basked in. The bigger mech’s spark could be heard, deep within the armor’s chassis, as it spun with easy contentment. Rodimus barely gathered enough strength to turn his helm and place a clumsy kiss to the former Enforcer’s chassis.

“How are you feeling?”

The young prime completed the reboot on his vocalizer and released a weak sigh. “That was amazing.”

A soft laugh. “I was concerned at first that I’d injured you.”

“Are you kidding? It was great, just… why am I so weak?”

“Such an intense overload can result in significant fatigue and temporary disorientation.”

Rodimus shifted, finding himself largely immobile and his limbs uncooperative. Panic set in on the edges of his field as the young prime continued trying to move. He didn’t like being powerless or restrained; it was a fear that he’d had since he’d experienced both in the gutters before the war. “Mags, I can’t-“

“You must relax, my little prime. Give yourself time to recover.” Ultra Magnus carefully shifted the distressed captain away from himself and tipped Rodimus’ chin up so they could see each other.

The smaller mech immediately calmed at the sight of his intended’s face. A small smile lit Ultra Magnus’ lips as he gently began to massage Rodimus’ finials. “You will be alright. I have you. 

Though he still felt nervous at being reduced to such a helpless state, the young prime took a moment to calm himself. “Did you know that was possible? The reboot thing?”

“I had heard of it, but I have never experienced it first hand myself until now.”

Rodimus wingled his fingers experimentally and splayed his pronged peds. “You’ll stay til I’m good, right?”

“I wouldn’t dream of leaving you.” Ultra Magnus pressed a kiss to the center of Rodimus’ helm and the prime felt himself sag further against his intended. 

The red speedster believed him, settling comfortably against his larger companion. The former Enforcer went about tucking the blanket around both of them more securely, moving Rodimus with the utmost care as he did. The prime kept his attention on Magnus until the other mech had finally stopped shifting around. “Hey, Mags? I meant what I said before. I just wanted to let you know that you don’t have to say it back. Not until you mean it, okay?”

“I feel very strongly about you, Rodimus Prime. I promise you that it will be sparkfelt when I do say those words.”

Rodimus managed to incline his helm enough to brush tingling lips against Ultra Magnus’ chin. “I’m counting on it.”

As the pair drifted off into recharge for the remainder of the shift, the young prime from Nyon felt safe and truly happy for the first time since he came online.


	30. Chapter 30

Rodimus was finally cleared for duty by Ratchet the next shift. Though working wasn’t his favorite thing, the prime was bored out of his mind and more than happy to have some purpose back. Until his shift, though, the young prime found himself with nothing to do as he wandered the ship’s corridors.

Ultra Magnus had risen early before the shift began to take up his post on the bridge. He’d placed a gentle kiss on his intended’s lips before he left and Rodimus could still feel the tingle where their mouths had connected. As the red speedster shuffled toward his appointment with Rung, he replayed the events from earlier.

The blue mech had tried to untangle himself without waking his berthmate up. Rodimus could still feel the apology in Ultra Magnus’ field when the former Enforcer had accidently woken him up anyway. “I did not mean to awaken you, my prime.”

“No, it’s okay. I have to go see Ratchet soon anyway. Besides,” Rodimus stretched before crawling toward Ultra Magnus from his side of the berth. “I think I owe you something for falling asleep earlier. Even the score, you know?”

The red mech had tapped a golden finger against Magnus’ closed modesty panel suggestively. He was disappointed when the SIC gently brushed his attentions away a moment later. “There is not time, Rodimus. Perhaps when I return from my shift we can ‘even the score’ as you say.”

“Come on, Mags, it’s just a-“

“No, Rodimus-“

“But-“

“I said no.”

Without meaning to, the red speedster had caught himself shrinking back from the stern voice of his intended. The smallest hint of impatience had entered Ultra Magnus’ field and Rodimus felt sick with the knowledge that it was directed at him. When would he learn? Why couldn’t he just stop-

A soft sigh came from the larger mech as he reached toward the young prime. Rodimus face was twisted in deep thought and Ultra Magnus knew that the dialogue within the red mech’s helm was likely self-chastising and demeaning. But as the former Enforcer moved to touch his intended’s face, Rodimus flinched a little, like he expected to be struck. Something broke in Ultra Magnus to see his little prime flinch away. “I did not mean to snap at you. But you must understand that I cannot shirk my duties to the crew.”

Rodimus smiled up at him, nervousness flickering in his field. “It’s cool. I don’t mean to be pushy or anything and I’m sorry.”

“There is no need to apologize, little prime. I, too, would much rather stay in berth with you.” That time, Rodimus hadn’t pulled away when the larger mech reached to caress his cheek. “There will be many for opportunities share intimate moments with each other.”

The young prime offered another smile, but it was still guarded. “Yeah, I get it. Don’t worry! If Ratchet clears me, then I’ll be the one coming to relieve you on the bridge. All is good.”

With a brief moment of hesitation, Ultra Magnus had dipped his helm to place a chaste kiss on Rodimus’ mouth. The prime had watched, silent, until the larger mech left for the bridge without further discussion.

Though the kiss had served to ease some of the tension in his processor, Rodimus still could hear the frustration in the larger mech’s voice. He knew that Ultra Magnus wasn’t truly angry with him. But for some reason, the insecurities had risen once more and were swamping him anyway.

As he continued to make his way toward Rung’s office, Rodimus tried to analyze every part of the conversation. When he finally reached his desitination, he hadn’t made it a single step closer to quelling the fear in his spark.

 

~o0o~

 

For all of First Aid’s expertise in the medical field, no one was perfect. 

He’d successfully performed a routine sedation and temporary deactivation many times during his life cycle. But in the excitement of the court case and resolving the trauma of the captain, First Aid had missed an important detail: Megatron had a point-one percenter spark.

Deep in the bowels of the ship, Thunderclash’s body thudded to the floor. The back of his helm was caved in slightly by an unforeseen blow. He hadn’t even had time to send a warning comm.

The silver mech shook off the remaining haze of a deep recharge before dealing the colorful mech an insulting kick to the chest. _Lovestruck fool. _  
He straightened his spinal strut and every joint cracked. Megatron adjusted his optics to his surrounds, recognizing the cargo hold. So that’s where they’d put him.  
Down in the hold like he was a provision or merchandise to be strapped down and ignored until he was needed.__

__The silver mech laughed and dealt Thunderclash another blow, this one to the unconscious mech’s faceplate. The former-Matrix bearer didn’t even moan. Momentarily, Megatron wondered if he’d killed him. No matter._ _

__Megatron’s plating resettled as he stepped over his former guard and made his way toward one of the doors. It would be hard getting above decks without being seen. But Megatron only had one goal in mind, a goal that he would do anything to achieve._ _

__Turning back, he shoved the limp body of Thunderclash behind some boxes. A pool of energon had formed under the mech; it was obvious that he was badly in need of a medic and fast. That is, if he was even still alive. No matter._ _

__Megatron grinned at the streaked energon left from where he’d dragged Thunderclash behind the boxes and imagined that it belonged to another mech.  
As he made his way back toward the door, the silver mech imagined the look on Magnus’ face when he realized what had happened to his precious little Rodimus. Megatron wanted to hear the blue mech scream, something that he couldn’t achieve through directly injurying the former Enforcer. Oh, no…_ _

__The SIC had already revealed his weak underbelly to Megatron. The way Ultra Magnus and Rodimus had looked at each other during the sentencing-  
Just the thought sent a violent snarl boiling up from the ex-warlord’s vocalizer. His intended had been taken, stolen from him by that imposter in blue armor._ _

__A mirthful growl escaped the ex-warlord as he keyed the door open and slipped into the hall. Ah, yes. It was time to pay his little speedster a visit._ _


	31. Chapter 31

Rung had to be one of the most patient mechs to ever come online.

Rodimus could never seem to hold still under the little psychiatrist’s attention, always chewing at his lips or kicking his peds. Every time such behaviors took up, Rung would kindly remind him that there was no reason to be ashamed or scared or uneasy when talking to him. But the young prime always felt like the orange mech saw and heard all the things that he didn’t say. Today was one of those days.

Another note was completed on the ever-present datapad. “Rodimus, you understand that Ultra Magnus’ feelings toward you are unconditional, yes?”

The question made the red speedster in question stutter as he floundered for an answer. “I just- I don’t want to make him mad, you know?”

“Of course, I understand. But disagreements are common in every healthy relationship. You have no reason to fear him.”

“I know, but what if he gets tired of me? I made him upset this morning-“

Rung chuckled softly then. “I’m sure that he was not upset with you, captain. You know that Ultra Magnus takes his rules very seriously. He understands that if he cannot act upon them himself, then he is not worthy of enforcing them when others disregard those same regulations.”

“Yeah, I guess so.” Rodimus picked at he paint on his left thumb. “I just want to be better for him.”

“Wanting to be better is completely normal.”

“It is?”

The orange mech smiled and leaned forward. “Of course it is. But you must understand that true happiness can only be achieved by being the best version of yourself for _you _first. Don’t change who you are for your partner. It only leads to sorrow and misunderstanding.”__

__The speedster furrowed his brow as he thought about the other mech’s words. He’d always lived for something or someone else. The war. The Wreckers. Optimus’ approval. Megatron. Rung was right, but by no means would the change be easy to make. Nothing worth anything had ever been easy. “So… how to I make myself better for me?”_ _

__“First, you must understand that everything will turn out in the end. If it doesn’t turn out, then it’s not the end.”_ _

__“What does that mean?”_ _

__The psychiatrist nudged his glasses higher onto his nose with a finger. “It means that you must be yourself even if it is not who someone else wants you to be. Megatron tried to change you, to break you down, and fit you into his mold. The right mech, be it Mganus or not, will stay in the end and be happy with who you are without trying to change you. If not, then it’s not the end. There will be another mech or femme meant for you.”_ _

__Rodimus wasn’t sure if he liked that maxim. Ultra Magnus was very important to him, but deep down, he knew that Rung was right. He couldn’t change himself for anyone else without damaging what he already had. “I think I get it. Maybe.”_ _

__Another gentle and understanding smile from the orange mech. “Just remember that it will be okay in the end. You’ll see.”_ _

__“Thank you, Rung. I will-“_ _

__A door beeped as a correct code was entered._ _

__Rodimus lifted his optics when the mech across from him stiffened in his chair._ _

__“I thought I might find you here.”_ _

__The prime knew that voice anywhere. He stood quickly and spun around._ _

__“Drift!”_ _

__As Rodimus stood to greet his amica, Rung gave the swordsmech a wry look before laughing. “Rodimus and I had just finished. Enjoy the rest of your shift both of you.”_ _

__Drift grinned wryly at his best friend. “How do you feel about sparring before your shift? Or Swerve’s?”_ _

__The red speedster considered for a moment before swatting playfully at his TIC. “I know better than to spar you, Drifter! I’m out of practice. You beat me every time!”_ _

__“I can’t help that I’m so good-“_ _

__“Definitely Swerve’s. Not too much though.” Rodimus turned to see an approving Rung nod to him. “I have a shift coming up soon, so we’ll just pop in real fast.”_ _

__Drift swung an arm around his amica as they turned to head toward the door. “Excited to be back?”_ _

__“You have no idea! It’s been so boring-“_ _

__A shadow fell over the open door as they approached. A mech ducked under the frame and towered over the three mechs already inside the room as he grinned down at them. A row of fangs glowed menacingly under brilliant red optics._ _

___Megatron. ____ _

____Before Rodimus could even scream, Drift was moving from his side. The swordsmech’s swords were already in his hands as he charged the ex-warlord with an angry screech._ _ _ _

____The young prime was frozen in place, forced to watch as a single hand batted his beloved amica to the side. Drift collided with the wall and was quickly buried as several of Rung’s model ships fell from the shelves above him. Rodimus couldn’t tear his gaze away from where his friend disappeared under the wreckage as Megatron advanced further into the room. Even after several kliks, there was no movement from where the white speedster had fallen._ _ _ _

____Rodimus barely heard Rung yelling for him to run. Megatron, seeing that the red mech was frozen in shock, passed him by and prowled toward the small psychiatrist. The prime was hardly aware when Rung’s cries were abruptly cut off, a large black hand closing around the little orange mech’s throat. A high squeak came from the psychiatrist, followed by an audible crack. Then, finally, an impact as a body hit the floor by Rung’s desk._ _ _ _

____Rodimus Prime knew in that moment that he was going to die._ _ _ _

_____Primus, have mercy on me. ____ _ _ _


	32. Chapter 32

When Rodimus was late to show up for his shift, Ultra Magnus was more than a little put out.

It was the prime’s first shift back. How could he not show up? The former Enforcer sighed heavily as the first fourth of the shift passed. The rest of the bridge crew had noticed their captain’s absence by then and they had begun to murmur amongst themselves. A glare from the huge SIC silenced the worst of the gossip.

Then Nightbeat came skidding onto the bridge, covered in spilled energon.

The mech was shaking violently, stuttering and unable to form complete sentences. Ratchet was paged. The bridge fell into panic as the detective collapsed to the floor, mumbling and rocking. “Thunder- Thunder-“

At first, they hadn’t been able to get anything else out of him and considered sending for Rung. But when Ratchet arrived and found no obvious wounds on Nightbeat, they decided that the energon couldn’t be from him.

Rung was paged. There was no answer.

Nighbeat continued shaking on the floor. When he finally connected optics with Ultra Magnus, the former Enforcer got his answer. “Meg- loose- killed Thunder- _Primus _-“__

__Magnus lines ran cold. “Where, soldier?”_ _

__“Down- the hold- please-“_ _

__With a nod from Magnus, Ratchet transformed and sped from the room, tailed by Nautica and Perceptor. The blue mech bent over Nightbeat, shielding the traumatized mech from the worst of the staring bots as he continued muttering. “Crushed helm- everywhere- oooh-“_ _

__“Where was Megatron?”_ _

__“Gone! He- he-“_ _

__Tailgate came flying in next, chubby legs stumbling over themselves as he staggered onto the bridge. His visor was flickering violently, pulsing with light as he sought out Cyclonus._ _

__Wordlessly and not seeming to care what the others thought, the purple seeker dropped to his knees and gathered his little mate into a protective embrace. Even as he remained hunched over Nigthbeat, Ultra Magnus heard Tailgate’s words to his conjunx. “They’re dead, they’re dead, they’re dead-“_ _

__Leaving Nightbeat, the former Enforcer approached the pair on the floor. Cyclonus hissed a warning until he looked up and recognized the shadow over them as Magnus. After a nod from the former Decepticon, Ultra Magnus knelt until he could rest a trembling hand on Tailgate’s spinal strut. “Who is dead, little one?”_ _

__“D-Drift! Someone killed him! In Rung’s office! A-and- oooh-“ The minibot shoved his face into Cyclonus’ shoulder, sobbing heavily. “Rung too! His n-neck-“_ _

__Ultra Magnus watched as the tiny waste disposal bot sucked in two more breathes before slumping against his mate, out cold. Cyclonus cradled the white mini against himself and whispered soothing words against Tailgate’s helm. The former Enforcer stood and left them be on the floor._ _

__Thunderclash first. Now Drift and Rung._ _

__Ultra Magnus opened his comm. just as the last of his calm demeanor began to slip away. :Rodimus? Rodimus, for Primus’ sake, please answer me-:_ _

__Silence._ _

__The blue mech had a vision of his intended’s smiling face as he tried again. :Rodimus, I beg you-:_ _

__:Mags!:_ _

__Ultra Magnus felt as if he might collapse with relief when he heard his prime’s voice. :Rodimus, where are you? Megatron is loose on the ship-:_ _

__Another voice came through Rodimus comm. then, indicating that it’s owner was pressing his mouth against the side of the speedster’s helm. :I’m afraid that he already knows, Magnus.:_ _

__Fear gripped the blue mech’s spark, threatening to choke him. :Megatron. Let him go.:_ _

__:I am afraid that that is not an option. If it is any consolation at all, he is not the one that I want.:_ _

__Ultra Magnus looked out at the other mechs and femmes on the bridge. They were all looking at him, terror written plainly on every face as they waited for direction.  
The former Enforcer stepped around the huddled forms of Cyclonus and Tailgate. “I’ve been notified that Drift and Rung might be in need of medical assistance-“_ _

__“Drift?”_ _

__Ultra Magnus turned in time to see Ratchet coming onto the bridge._ _

__The medic was smeared with energon after transporting Thunderclash to the medbay. From what Ratchet had seen, it didn’t look good for the colorful mech. He’d left Thunderclash in First Aid and Velocity’s care and returned straight away to the bridge, hoping to find his conjunx there. “Where’s Drift?”_ _

__The usually stoic, no-nonsense medic’s voice was halting as he turned panicking optics on Magnus. The blue mech couldn’t hold his gaze as he spoke. “It would appear that Megatron cornered him and Rung in Rung’s office. Their conditions are-“_ _

__But Ratchet was already gone, bolting back the way he’d come on his way toward Rung’s office. Ultra Magnus didn’t have to say a word before three more mechs moved to follow after the distraught medic. The blue SIC stood quietly as a revived Tailgate stepped away from his conjunx and, with a few soft words, sent Cyclonus after them toward Rung’s office. The red-opticed seeker gave Magnus one glance before unsheathing his longsword and disappearing down the hall._ _

__:Mags, I’m sorry.:_ _

__Ultra Magnus turned away from the other mechs on the bridge at the sound of Rodimus’ voice over the comm. :Why are you sorry, Rodimus’? This is not you’re fault-:_ _

__:I didn’t get to do better. D-Don’t come after me, okay? Just-:_ _

__:Like slag I won’t.: The former Enforcer glared out at the stars, struggling to keep his voice even. :Rodimus, I promise you. Just tell me where you are-:_ _

__Megatron’s voice came over Rodimus’ comm. :Your quarters, Magnus. I suggest you come alone. Otherwise, your precious Rodimus will suffer the consequences of your inability to follow orders.:_ _

__Ultra Magnus’ voice trembled with anger as he spoke. :Don’t touch him.:_ _

__:There is no need for that, Enforcer. If you do as I say, he shan’t be harmed.:_ _

__There was a crackly pause and a gasp from the other end of the comm. :Rodimus? Rodimus, can you hear me?:_ _

__A quiet sob came through the comm. :Please don’t, Mags, he’s gonna kill you just like he did Drift and Rung-:_ _

__:There is no evidence that they are dead. Ratchet is with them now-:_ _

__:Drift? Is- Is he alive, Mags? I didn’t feel anything-:_ _

__Ultra Magnus understood immediately. If Drift had been deactivated, Radius would’ve felt the broken bond in his spark. :At this time, I believe that he is alive.:_ _

__There was a moment of silence on the other end of the comm. Radius’ voice was steady when he spoke. :Stay away, Mags. Just- just find the knights, okay? It’ll all be okay in the end-:_ _

__The blue mech couldn’t stop the tear that fell from his left optic. :Don’t you _dare _say goodbye to me, Rodimus Prime.: Magnus cleared his throat, fighting the emotions that threatened to take over his processor. He had to stay calm for his intended’s sake. :Have you been injured at all?:___ _

____:I don’t think so, no.:_ _ _ _

____:Good. Then I will need your help when I arrive.:_ _ _ _

____:Mags?:_ _ _ _

____:Yes, Rodimus?:_ _ _ _

____There was a sniff on the other end of the comm., followed by a trembling whisper. :If I don’t get a chance to say it again… I think I kind of love you.:_ _ _ _

____Ultra Magnus felt a choking gulp leave his vocalizer. :And I you, little one. I will be there shortly.:_ _ _ _

____He cut the comm. and gathered himself before turning back to the mechs and femmes on the bridge. Since the initial arrival of Nightbeat, more bots had arrived on the bridge, likely having heard of Megatron’s escape. Rewind and Chromedome had arrived at some point and the mnemosurgeon had lifted both Rewind and Tailgate into a protective embrace on his lap. Swerve and Bluestreak were talking to Nightbeat in soothing voices as they wiped away the mess of energon on his plating._ _ _ _

____With a clearing of the SIC’s throat, everybot present turned to look up at him. “Megatron has our captain captive.” As the essabled mechs and femmes gasped, Ultra Magnus continued. “As far as I understand, he is holding my intended hostage in an attempt to get an audience with myself. I am going to meet him in my own quarters-“_ _ _ _

____“You’re meeting him alone?”_ _ _ _

____“Not a chance-“_ _ _ _

____“He can’t do that-“_ _ _ _

____The shouting didn’t stop comepletely even when the former Enforcer lifted a hand to silence them. When he thought he could be heard, he continued. “I understand your willingness to help, but Rodimus’ life could be placed in further danger if I do not come alone as Megatron requests. I will keep an open comm. for the purpose of-“_ _ _ _

____“There is no way in Pit you’re going after him without me.”_ _ _ _

____Ultra Magnus turned. Drift stood ni the doorway to the bridge, arms folded in defiance._ _ _ _

____The white speedster appeared no worse for ware as he stood slightly in front of his conjunx. When the swordsmech strode further into the room, flanked by Ratchet, he spoke directly to the former Enforcer. “I’m coming with you to get my amica. Ratchet says I’m fine-“_ _ _ _

____“I didn’t-“_ _ _ _

____“-and you’re not going alone.” Drift finally stopped in front of Ultra Magnus, optics ablaze. “I promise I won’t kill him. Yet.”_ _ _ _

____The former Enforcer cast a look between Drift and Ratchet. “And you have been medically cleared?”_ _ _ _

____The medic rolled his optics in answer. “No, but I can’t stop him and neither can you. He took a nasty knock to the helm and should be resting, but-“_ _ _ _

____“But I’m going. Rodimus is my amica and he needs me right now.”_ _ _ _

____Ultra Magnus sighed heavily. His spark felt as if it were about to burst as he thought of facing off Megatron alone. If he lost…_ _ _ _

____“Alright. Let’s roll out.”_ _ _ _


	33. Chapter 33

Ultra Magnus had always found privacy and peace in his quarters. They had been the place where he could remove his armor, both physically and mentally. He had always been able to count on the locked door to hide him away from the optics of the crew he served outside.

But today, he wanted nothing more than to run from his hab. The blue mech stood outside the door, flanked by a fidgeting Drift, as he stared down at the keypad. 

He didn’t know what he would find inside once he opened the door. Megatron might have already done enough damage to his intended that Rodimus may never be repaired. Or, the silver mech was waiting for him and would kill Magnus while Rodimus was forced to watch.

As the scenarios continued to slideshow through his helm, Ultra Magnus turned to Drift. “Stay out here unless I comm. you. If I do, you are to come in and immediately remove Rodimus from the room. Do you understand?”

Drift’s gaze never once left the door as he slowly nodded. “Yeah, got it. Just get him out of there alive, Magnus. You know that I don’t care what it takes.”

“Indeed. Are you ready?”

“More than.”

Ultra Magnus put in his key and opened the door to his hab.

 

~o0o~

 

Rodimus sat on the edge of the couch, unmoving as his capture paced around him. The silver mech, true to his word, hadn’t even landed a single blow to him. The red speedster watched, mouth gagged and hands pinioned, as Megatron stalked the room like a caged animal.

The silver mech gave Rodimus a nasty smirk as he paced and moved to snatch the prime’s chin in his hand. “The fact that he would knowingly walk into a trap for one such as you, little prime… It’s pathetic. How desperate he must be for an easy frag.”

Megatron tossed the young prime’s face away. Rodimus struggled to swallow saliva around the dirty rag that that was stuffed in his mouth. He wanted desperately to comm. Magnus, to hear the blue mech’s voice reassure him. But he knew that contacting his intended was dangerous for them both.

The door beeped and slid open.

Rodimus turned to see Ultra Magnus stride into the room, the bigger mech’s optics immediately searching him out where he sat on the couch. The speedster released a high keen of warning when he connected optics with the entering mech. Immediately, Magnus’ field pushed against Rodimus like a physical wave, bathing the prime in reassurance and comfort.

“Ah, Magnus. You are alone?”

The former Enforcer’s voice was flat as he answered. “Drift is outside should you become unreasonable. But yes. I am here alone.” At the revelation that his amica was alive and well, Rodimus’ lashing field calmed to more manageable level.

Megatron moved like an Earth-cat despite his size, sweeping around the couch to grab Rodimus delicate spoiler. The smaller mech froze instinctively as the sensitive appendage was squeezed. “I’m glad to see you. Truly, I am. Do you remember what you did to me in the brig?”

“I struck you about the face. I should not have done so.”

“Oh? Well. I think that now is the perfect time to even the score, am I correct?”

Ultra Magnus looked at his intended, bound and gagged, as the ex-warlord gave his spoiler a harsh tug. With the clothe filling his mouth, Rodimus only managed a   
whimper of pain. “You said you would not harm him if I met with you, Megatron.”

“Indeed I did, didn’t I?” The silver warlord gave the spoiler a twist. The speedster sucked in sharply only to choke on the rag a little. Tears sparkled in Rodimus’ darkening optics as Ultra Magnus began to move forward. The ex-warlord moved his other hand to cup around Rodimus’ exposed throat. “Ah ah ah. This is really your fault, Magnus. After all, it was you who trusted a Decepticon.”

“You wear the Autobot shield, Megatron. The charges that you were imprisoned for had nothing to do with former alliances.”

The ex-warlord chuckled darkly. “You’re right, Magnus. This is far more personal.”

Rodimus tried to duck away, but Megatron caught his helm finial anyway. The silver mech dragged up on the helm ornament until the prime sat ramrod straight, his hands limp behind him as all of the smaller mech’s focus went to the pressure at the top of his helm. Ultra Magnus forced himself to stay absolutely still as Rodimus connected otpics with him, helpless to fight back.

“He’s quite pretty, isn’t he? These speedster frames, so much like seekers. Even the spoilers are nearly as reactive to pain and pleasure.” To accent his point, Megatron jerked lightly on the finial, making Rodimus spoiler shoot up with the obvious discomfort that the treatment caused. The ex-captain smiled wickedly at Magnus before bending down to lick the same spoiler from hinge to tip. 

Even though he visibly tried to fight it, the young prime’s optics glazed slightly at the sensation. Ultra Magnus felt sick at the sight. “Megatron, I am warning you-“  
“Of what, Enforcer? One step and your precious prime dies. Otherwise, you get to watch me play with him in any manner I choose, understood?”

The blue mech connected optics with his intended. Rodimus was staring at him, his field reaching out, saturated with panic as Megatron continued to touch him. The look in the speedster’s optic was clear.

Ultra Magnus darted forward the moment that the silver warlord dipped to drag his glossa over the red mech’s audial. A moment before he made contact with the other mech, the former Enforcer sent a comm. to Drift. Just as his frame collided with Megatron and tackled him away from Rodimus with an angry yell, the door to the hab snapped open and an infuriated swordsmech swept inside.

Megatron had the advantage before Magnus even touched him. Having fought in the gladiatorial arenas, he knew every point to hit and every joint to break. Ultra Magnus knew that the other mech would win before he’d even decided to fight him. But the former Enforcer had realized how little his own life meant to him when he’d seen the blatant suffering in Rodimus’ searching gaze.

Distantly, the SIC heard Drift pull a wailing Rodimus’ from the room. That was before a hand slammed into the side of Magnus’ helm, destroying the audial completely. Every strike that the former Enforcer tried to land was blocked and deflected, every one turned back on himself. It wasn’t long before a fog had begun to settle within his processor, threatening to overtake his remaining thought processes.

“You know, Magnus, I was perfectly happy to have you watch me kill your little captain. But, I admit, someone who fights back is far more satisfying.”

Spitting energon and spraying it from his broken nasal bridge, Magnus managed to nail the other mech with a solid helm-butt. Megatron was stunned just long enough for the former Enforcer to wiggle out from under him and make it up onto his shaky peds. “You’ll never touch him again as long I am living, Megatron.”

“A sorry promise as you won’t be alive for much longer-“

Another blow landed on his previously damaged audial and Ultra Magnus felt like his helm was spinning with the pain. He barely had time to react before a knee landed in his groin, denting his modesty panel in a cheap shot.

Knowing that the loss of his footing would mean deactivation at this point, Magnus diverted his stumble so that he would fall against Megatron. The silver mech shouted with surprise as he found himself on the floor, pinned down under the blue mech. Ultra Magnus snarled in the ex-warlord’s face, baring energon-stained teeth. “You’ll never have him again!”

Megatron thrashed violently, a savage look in his optics as he spewed curses and oaths at the former Enforcer. “He will never escape me! He’ll always be looking over his shoulder, losing sleep, always expecting me to-“

Ultra Magnus didn’t remember much after that.

Looking back, the former Enforcer only remembered seeing red in both optics and in his field. He didn’t remember his fists repeatedly landing on the mech beneath him, or how the angry screams of the other mech eventually fell silent. Ultra Magnus didn’t remember trembling so violently with sudden fatigue and sticky sobs that he had to crawl away from the motionless bot on his habsuite floor. 

When Drift passed Rodimus off to Ratchet’s careful embrace, he made his way back into the habsuite. He found Megatron on the floor, barely alive in a pool of his own energon. Drift would forever remember the sound of the fluids bubbling in Megatron’s broken vents. The swordsmech ignored the dying ex-warlord as he stepped over him and made his way to the berthroom. A trail of energon led there, lost by a clearly injured mech.

Pushing open the berthroom door, he found Ultra Magnus at last. The big mech lay bleeding profusely on the berth, optics tightly shut in both pain and denial. As Drift came closer to the former Enforcer, he noticed what was clasped in Magnus’s arms, so tightly and smeared with energon that it’s color was almost unrecognizable.

It was a blue blanket.


	34. Chapter 34

Megatron was placed on life support systems to keep his spark turning in his chest. The trauma to the ex-warlord’s face and helm left the medics questioning whether or not he would ever wake. To be safe, they kept the silver mech under heavy dampeners and inhibitors where he stayed locked away in the brig. A guard was always posted over him.

Thunderclash came around swinging, nearly taking out Velocity when he flailed back to consciousness. The mech was immediately yelling when he woke and hadn’t been consolable for some time. Only the arrival of Rodimus in the medbay calmed the distressed Thunderclash who instantly reached out to the prime. Though the red speedster didn’t particularly like the colorful mech on the medberth, he came forward and allowed himself to be hugged tightly against Thunderclash’s heaving chest. 

Rung’s lanky body lay on a medberth nearby, his throat crushed in the same manner that Rodimus had been by Megatron’s fist. Being so small, Ratchet had had a Pit of a time intubating the orange mech. But Rung, as always, had proven himself a fighter. Even though he remained hooked to the respirator and in a medically induced recharge, the little psychiatrist was rapidly improving.

When Thunderclash jerked violently with nightmares, Rodimus moved to stroke a gentle hand across the other mech’s forehelm. Instantly, the red-opticed Autobot calmed considerably. Ratchet said that the dreaming would likely continue until Thunderclash’s processor had recovered fully from the blow to his helm.  
The captain shifted in his chair beside the mediberth. Where was Ultra Magnus? The medics hadn’t allowed Rodimus to see his intended as all. In fact, the last the speedster had seen of Magnus was when the blue mech was tackling Megatron in the habsuite. Ratchet and First Aid had taken the larger mech away the moment Drift found him. At lteast that’s Rodimus had heard.

What if Magnus was dead? No, they would’ve told him by now. Did the former Enforcer not want to see him after what had happened? Or maybe-

“Rodimus?”

The red speedster lifted his optics to find Ratchet standing over him. “Ratch? Where is he?” Rodimus scrambled out of the chair onto wobbling peds. “Is he alive? Is he mad at me? What’s going on?”

Ratchet raised his hands, palms out. “Easy, easy. Everything went well and he’s awake asking for you-”

“Can I see him?” 

With a soft chuckle, Ratchet stood back and pointed toward one of the private officers’ rooms at the back of the medbay. Rodimus darted around the former CMO and dashed toward the room. His spark pounded in his throat as he neared the door. 

When Rodimus finally made it inside the room, he paused at what he saw.

Ultra Magnus was not the one laying in the berth.

Bright scarlet optics turned away from Velocity who stood beside the medberth. When they settled on the speedster in the doorway, a genuine smile appeared on the the little mech’s face. “Rodimus?”

“Minimus!” Unable to control himself any longer, Rodimus bounded over to the berth and barely stopped short of crawling onto it himself. “How are you?”

“A little battered, I’m afraid.”

It was then that Rodimus took in the sickly pallor that had settled over Minimus’ plating. The usually rich color of the plating, so close to that of healthy Earth-flora, was faded to a dull mint pallor. The red biolights that adorned Minimus’ slender waist pulsed faintly, barely visible compared to their usual vivid glow. Several little dents marred the little mechs armor and served to show just how brittle the metal was.

Rodimus found himself afraid to touch his intended and moved back a little to give Minimus more space. The prime looked back to Ratchet in the doorway as Velocity continued making adjustments to the machines in the room. “Where’s the armor?”

Ratchet shook his head sadly from the doorway. “He took quite a beating at Megatron’s hands. Though he would’ve healed just as well in the armor, I didn’t want to take any chances. His spark has to work harder as it is just to power the Magnus armor, so I decided to remove it from the recovery equation.”

Despite the obvious weakness he suffered, Minimus’ optics were bright when he addressed his intended. “I am afraid, my prime, that the courting gift I gave to you was ruined in the scuffle.”

“‘Scuffle’?” Rodimus optics were wide as he sat down in the chair beside the medberth. “You think I care about some blanket right now, Mims? Last I saw you, you were fighting Megatron hand-to-hand to _save me _. You could’ve died!” The green mech on the berth watched as his intended fought to force words from his glitching vocalizer. “You could’ve died, Mims, and then what would I have done? He would’ve- You-“__

__Minimus stretched out his hands to the speedster. Without hesitating, Rodimus climbed into the medberth and, with more care than Ratchet thought he was capable of, gathered the injured little bot against him. Sharing a glance, the former CMO and the femme silently left the room, closing the door behind them._ _

__The load-bearer pushed his face against the warm red plating of his intended’s chest. “But that did not happen, Rodimus. My spark is recovering from the strain quite quickly. I shall be better in no time at all.”_ _

__“But you might not have been.”_ _

__“I know. But you must understand where I stood when I came into that room. Megatron would never have left you alone had I not fo him. I had no choice but to act, even if it did cost me my spark.”_ _

__The SIC’s words sent little jolts traveling through Rodimus’ spark and he had to remind himself not to squeeze the smaller bot too tightly. “I love you, Minimus. I know I do.”_ _

__“I love you too, Rodimus.”_ _

__“You do?”_ _

__A light kiss grazed Rodimus’ chest plating where Minimus could feel the speedster’s spark spinning wildly. “I most certainly do. There is no doubt.”_ _

__The young prime’s field exploded with color as he wrapped himself completely around his little intended. Rodimus helped the green mech to shift until the wires and tubes connected to him were not bent or kinked as the pair settled down into the medberth. “Are you hurting anywhere?”_ _

__“Yes, but it is not something that you can fix. It is simply the result of an overtaxed spark, my prime.” A bit of hesitation flickered on the edge of the little bot’s field. “Rodimus?”_ _

__“Yeah, Mims?”_ _

__“You… understand that the armor- I may not be able to wear it again. At least not for some time.”_ _

__Rodimus moved until he could look down at the other mech’s face. Minimus seemed to be avoiding his intended’s searching look as he tried to bury his face further against the speedster’s chest. “Hey, come on. Look at me.” Only when Minimus’ complied did the prime continue. “I couldn’t care less about the Magnus armor and whether or not you wear it. You’re the same mech either way.”_ _

__“But your second-in-command…”_ _

__“Does not need the armor to fill his post. Once you’re all fixed up, you’ll still be the same mech I turn to and love, okay?” Rodimus secured his arms more firmly around the smaller mech who’d begun to tremble. “You can yell at me for being late and doing stupid stuff and drinking at Swerve’s-“_ _

__“I never yelled at you, I- I _admonished _-“___ _

____“You know what I mean, Mims. You can get back to all that SIC stuff that you love doing soon. Right now, you should try to recharge. I’m not going anywhere.”  
With a sigh, Minimus Ambus cuddled closer against the speedster’s chassis. A cold feeling was settling in his medical port and spreading in his lines, indicating that his dose of pain dampeners had been automatically administered. He couldn’t quite suppress the flaring of his vents in a yawn. “Agreed, Rodimus. I will see you when I wake.”_ _ _ _

____The pair fell in a comfortable recharge on the medberth. Outside the door, Ratchet watched through the small window as Minimus’ sparkrate slowed at last to a resting pace. The old medic couldn’t help but smile at them a final time before he turned away. Across the room, Rung’s sparkrate had increased, a sign that the orange mech would soon be waking up._ _ _ _


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y'all's comments are literally what is driving this fic. Thank you guys for sticking with me :)

“What do you expect of a bunch of trusting Autbots? Did they really think a monster like him could be so easily dealt with?”

The jet strode rapidly back and forth across the room. Wheeljack worried that he might begin wearing through the floor. “Star, you heard what Magnus did. Megaron might not even wake up-“

“Finally, someone sees the sense in clobbering the mech into the floor. I never expected to praise one such as _Magnus _-“__

__“Sit down.”_ _

__“Excuse me?”_ _

__“I said ‘sit down.’”_ _

__Starscream bristled. “Don’t you understand? They’re sending him here! To Cybertron! I don’t care if goody-good Ultra Magnus broke his gold streak by almost killing that brute!” Abruptly, the red seeker pressed his hand over his spark chamber._ _

__Wheeljack quickly stood from where he’d been lounging on the couch. “You alright?”_ _

__A spat curse was the white speedster’s answer as Starscream resumed his pacing. His hand remained over his chest as he spoke. “We can’t have him here- They can’t let him live-“_ _

__With a single quick movement, Wheeljack seized the jet’s free wrist and pulled the upset Starsream against his chest. He was surprised when the red mech didn’t even fight his embrace. Instead, the jet turned his dark helm into Wheeljack’s neck. “Star, I know it’s not gonna be fun or easy having Megatron on-planet. But you can’t forget that what happened will definitely play a part in his trial here. Plus, you get to help choose the jury.”_ _

__“Who cares?” A bitter laugh erupted from the seeker. “No one listened to me after the war was over. I told them he couldn’t be trusted and now he’s coming here and the jury doesn’t matter-“_ _

__Starscream tried to push away but stopped when Wheeljack spoke. “Listen to me. It all matters. All of it.” The scientist pulled his mate’s face up into they were optic to optic. “He won’t get away this time.”_ _

__The jet relaxed slightly when Wheeljack kissed him soft and slow. “You don’t have to admit it, Star, but I know you’re scared of him. And as long as he is here and alive on this planet, I won’t let him lay optics on you, if that’s what you want.”_ _

__“You can’t just hide me away here. I have a meeting today-”_ _

__The ex-Wrecker chuckled. “You’re right, I can’t. But I can try can’t I?”_ _

__Starscream shivered as the white speedster kissed him again, this time more deeply and with a bit more heat. The implication was clear in Wheeljack’s field. “Fine, I’ll bite. What do you have in mind?”_ _

__A black hand had slipped up during the kiss to tickle at one of the jet’s wing hinges on his back. The seeker sucked in a breath at the feeling as the sensitive wires were pinched and teased. Wheeljack murmured into his mate’s audial then. “I have a few stress-relieving ideas. Would you like to try them?”_ _

__“I suppose it couldn’t hurt.” Starscream allowed the scientist to kiss him again before pulling back. “You know that interfacing resolves nothing, right? That- That _beast _is still coming here.”___ _

____“I know,” purred Wheeljack’s deep voice, “But if I keep you busy here, then you’ll have no reason to go out there.”_ _ _ _

____The jet managed a half-sparked roll of his optics. “You’re in rare form today.”_ _ _ _

____“Perhaps I’m just good at hiding it.” Another tweek of the seeker’s twitching wing. “Come on, Star. A nice, slow interface might do you some good.”_ _ _ _

____“You’re spiking then.”_ _ _ _

____“Why do I always spike?” Wheeljack’s optics sparkled mischievously._ _ _ _

____Starscream snorted. “Because I’m lazy and I say so. I rule Cybertron after all.”_ _ _ _

____“I suppose I should humor you then, my lord.”_ _ _ _

____Needless to say, Starscream missed his meeting._ _ _ _


	36. Chapter 36

Minimus Ambus recovered quickly, his spark gaining strength as the shifts dragged on. Rodimus began taking his shifts back on the bridge whenever his intended was asleep. Everytime the prime returned to the medbay, he made a beeline straight for Minimus’ room where he would collapse into the berthside chair. Once seated, the exhausted Rodimus would regularly fall into a light recharge until either Ratchet or his intended woke him up.

“Rodimus?”

At the sound of Minimus’ voice, the young prime jolted awake. The fast movement caused a bolt of pain to shoot up his stiff spinal strut. He managed to hide it as he turned to the green mech on the berth. “Hey Mims! How do you feel?”

“I am well, but-“

“The bridge is good, I just turned it over to Thunderclash, then Drift will take it from him and oh! We made a pretty good distance today, nothing crazy happened, which was weird-“

“Rodimus!”

The prime stopped speaking immediately, his field recoiling slightly. “Yeah?”

Minimus sighed where he reclined on the medberth, surrounded by copious numbers of pillows and blankets. The smaller mech was fixing his intended with an intense stare. “Rodimus, you must go and recharge in a real berth. Otherwise, you will wear yourself down and become useless to the crew-“

Under the former Enforcer’s chastising, the speedster hung his helm. “I can’t.”

“Why not?”

And then the dam broke.

“Because what if he gets loose again?! Or what if your spark doesn’t heal properly and something happens while I’m away? Or you could-“

The prime was panting as tears began to flood his tired optics. It became obvious that the lack of recharge was largely responsible for such an emotional outburst. That, and unresolved trauma following the latest run in with Megatron.

Minimus could only look on as his captain and intended continued falling apart in front of him. Rodimus choked softly as he slumped back into the chair. “I can’t miss anything, Mims. I can’t recharge, I can’t fuel. He was touching me and you saw and I can’t stop thinking about it, it feels so dirty, and I want to crawl out of my plating all the time and I can’t be alone or _I just might try. _”__

__He met Minimus’ optics and the green mech saw the shear exhaustion reflected in the young prime’s face. “I’m just scared, Mims, even though I know there’s nothing to be afraid of and I’m so sorry that you have to put up with me.”_ _

__Minimus wished that Rung were well. It was clear that the speedster needed to talk with someone more qualitified than the green mech. Until the orange mech was better though, they would have to make due. “Come here, my little love.”_ _

__Rodimus scrambled up onto the berth to bury his face against Minimus’ chest. The former Enforcer moved to press a familiar kiss against the young prime’s forehelm. “Why did you not tell me these things before?”_ _

__“I don’t know. I guess I didn’t want to upset you or make you think I was dragging the whole thing out.”_ _

__“Oh, Rodimus.” The little bot folded his arms around his intended’s helm and held the upset speedster to his chest plates. “It is my job to comfort you in your time of need. Do not ever trivialize how you feel for my sake. Always tell me so that I may help you work through it.”_ _

__The prime wordlessly nuzzled at the smaller mech’s chest plates before placing a kiss over Minimus’ spark. They lay together in silence for a while, a tangle of limbs and fields, until Ratchet swung open the door._ _

__Both mechs on the medberth jumped upon the former CMO’s sudden intrusion into the room. “I have completed the final tests and ran the last of your inner energon samples, Minimus. Everything looks relatively normal. You should be fit to check out next cycle.”_ _

__Rodimus perked up. “What does ‘relatively’ mean?”_ _

__The medic lifted an optic brow as he studied the datapad in his hand. “Minimus himself is fine. The Magnus armor is still being repaired and healed under the care of Perceptor and Brainstorm.” A look of horror crossed over the green load-bearer’s features before Ratchet continued. “Fear not, I have taken away anything of Brainstorm’s that could cause complications. The armor will be returned to you in the exact condition that it was in before the fight.”_ _

__Minimus rested back down on the medberth to cuddle against Rodimus. The young prime pushed down the surprise in his field as the smaller mech sighed against his neck cables. Usually, Minimus wasn’t so touchy feely in front of an audience. Maybe it was a result of the recent events._ _

__“Until then, I’ll leave the both of you in peace. Drift said he’d be by later to bring you your energon, Rodimus. Minimus, Velocity will have your medical grade shortly.” As Ratchet moved to close the door, he paused and fixed both of the mech’s on the berth with a stern look. “Though I doubt Minimus will violate the rules, I’ll remind you both that there is no nasty business in my medbay. Understood?” The old mech hid a smirk as he watched Minimus Ambus blush furiously and try to stutter a retort._ _

__Rodimus’, surprisingly, was unphased by the implication and shot back quickly. “Aw, come on, Ratch. Don’t tell me that you and Drift haven’t had fun on your desk.”_ _

__The speedster gave him a coquettish smirk as Ratchet sputtered, optics wide and disbelieving. “That is highly unprofessional-“_ _

__“Don’t try to deny it. Your conjunx is my amica. He tells me _everything _.”___ _

____Still muttering and scowling, Ratchet backed out of the room. He slammed the door on the way out and Minimus jumped. “Why must you bate him?”  
“Because he’s a lot easier to fluster than everyone thinks. Really, Drift doesn’t tell me everything. I made a lucky guess.” _ _ _ _

____“Rodimus?”_ _ _ _

____The tone that Minimus used caught the young prime’s full attention. His smile faded immediately when he looked down at his intended. “Yeah?”_ _ _ _

____“I understand that you and Drift are close… but I do hope that you won’t tell him about the things you and I do in the berth.”_ _ _ _

____“Of course not, Mims. I wouldn’t do that if it made you uncomfortable.”_ _ _ _

____The smaller mech still looked uneasy as he played with Rodimus’ much larger hand. “Alright.”_ _ _ _

____“Is something bothering you?”_ _ _ _

____“It is not something I wish to discuss at this time.”_ _ _ _

____“Oh. Okay.” Rodimus took the curt response from his intended as a sign that the other mech didn’t want to pursue the topic further. Shifting further down against the pillows, the young prime kissed Minimus’ open palm where he held it in his own hand. “What do you say about a quick recharge before Drift arrives?”_ _ _ _

____Silently, Minimus nodded before tucking his nasal bridge against the prime’s neck cables. Rodimus gathered his berthmate against him, enjoying the feel of the load-bearer’s warm little chassis. Though he didn’t push his intended, the red speedster could still feel the unease swirling through Minimus’ field over the topic of interfacing. Before he could figure out what could be wrong, he fell into a deep recharge with the smaller mech nestled in his embrace._ _ _ _


	37. Chapter 37

“How do you feel now?”

“A lot better, actually. Thanks, Rung.”

The little psychiatrist blinked sleepily up at Rodimus from his medberth. “Of course, captain.”

Sensing that the small mech was falling into recharge, the young prime reached to gently pluck the glasses from Rung’s face. The psychiatrist didn’t even seem to notice as his dimming optics began to close. With a final lazy smile at his captain, the orange mech on the berth faded into recharge.

Rodimus gave Rung a final look of consideration before pulling the medical sheet up to cover the bright light of the resting mech’s spark. The young prime had sought out the psychiatrist in hopes of resolving some of the tension lingering in his frame. He’d had trouble relaxing sense the incident with Megatron. Memories of the silver mech touching him while Ultra Magnus had been forced to watch haunted him every cycle.

Thankfully, Ratchet cleared Rung to give Rodimus a short session. Rodimus had sat by the orange mech’s berthside and had told the smaller bot about his nightmares and fears and even his persisting inability to fuel and recharge properly. 

The little psychiatrist had given him a gentle pat on the hand when Rodimus had finished and told the young prime that such things were completely normal. Rung had gone on to give the speedster exercises that he could do that would help ease the nervous tension. Rodimus reviewed the questions that he was supposed to ask himself whenever he began to feel stressed or began to have intrusive thoughts.

He mumbled the questions under his breath as he made his way back to Minimus’ room. “Is this thought helpful? Is this thought giving me power, or taking it away? Am I being avoidant? What can I learn from what happened to me?”

Rodimus continued reviewing the questions that Rung gave him as he entered the private room and closed the door behind himself. He was so distracted with his thoughts, that he nearly ran into another mech head on. “Oh!” He caught himself with a gasp. “Mims! What are you doing out of berth?”

The small mech turned to look at him from where he’d been looking down at a datapad. His facial insignia almost hid the smile on his face. “I have been cleared for duty and will be reporting to the bridge next shift.”

“That’s great!” Rodimus retrained himself from grabbing and lifting his intended into a hug. He knew that Minimus hated being picked up. “So, are you headed back to your hab? I thought maybe I would go spar with Drift while you settle back in.”

Surprise crossed through the former Enforcer’s face. “Rodimus…”

The prime sensed nervousness in his intended’s field and quickly thought back to his conversation with Rung. The psychiatrist had mentioned that creating distance and alone time would foster a more stable relationship. But judging by the nervous energy beginning to manifest in Minimus’ field… “Everything okay, Mims?”

“I am unsure that my hab is the most comfortable place for me at this time.”

“Oh… Oh! I think Drift had everything repaired and cleaned up. Unless… you’d rather just stay at my hab for now. It’s kind of a mess at the moment-“

“I know that my hab has likely been returned to its previous state… but without the armor…”

Before Minimus could finish his explanation, the young prime was nodding. “It’s okay, you don’t have to explain. I get it.”

The small mech had only begun to appear before the crew without the armor recently. With the Magnus armor completely taken from him, the diminuitive Minimus wasn’t fully comfortable staying alone in his hab without it. Especially after the way Megatron had easily shown up there and gotten inside with no trouble at all. Though it would be nearly impossible for such a drama to repeat itself, Minimus was secretly terrified of the thought of the ex-warlord finding him there in his irreducible state. “I suppose we should be going then?”

Rodimus refixed his attention on the little mech in front of him. “Sure, wanna grab something at Swerve’s before we head to my place? I haven’t fueled yet this cycle.”

“Lead the way.”

 

~o0o~

 

Minimus Ambus didn’t so much as pause as he entered the bar at Rodimus’ side. The green bot kept his chin level with the floor as he passed mechs and femmes who gaped at his irreducible form. A few murmurs started up, but the music didn’t stop as it usually did when Ultra Magnus entered the establishment. Strangely, Minimus couldn’t find it in him to care and he reached up to take the young prime’s offered hand.

Without a bit of hesitation, the captain’s golden fingers closed around his intended’s. A single flash of Rodimus’ unusually defensive optics silenced the whispers and averted the worst of the stares. For the most part, everybot got over their shock quickly and returned to whatever they’d been doing.

“Well, fancy seeing you here again!”

A moment later, before the pair could reach the relative safety of the bar, Rodimus and Minimus were blindsided by a tipsy Whirl. The copter peered down at the green mech, his single optic winking brightly as he studied the new arrivals. “Yer a cute little thing under all that armor, aren’t you? Lucky for you. Roddy here already has his name on you.”

“I am not cute-“

But Whirl was already dancing away on spindly legs, laughing raucously as he went. Rodimus watched as the notoriously loud mech made his way over to where Tailgate and Cyclonus sat. The prime didn’t look away until he was sure that Whirl wouldn’t interrupt them again. He connected optics with Cyclonus and was surprised when the violet seeker hissed what the prime assumed was a warning to the former Wrecker. Radius was even further amazed when Whirl actually sat down, his teasing of the prime and his companion forgotten.

The red speedster looked down at his intended. “You good?”

Despite his cheeks being stained heavily with a blush, Minimus didn’t appear to be overly upset. “It is fine. I look forward to having my armor back.”

“I don’t.”

As the pair finally reached the bar and hoisted themselves into neighboring chairs, Minimus turned questioning optics on his companion. “Why is that?”

Quickly, Rodimus gave their order to a grinning Swerve before turning back to the green bot beside him. “I don’t know. It’s new and I like being taller than you.” The young prime paused for a moment, a glinter entering his optics. “And Whirl is right. You’re pretty cute like this.”

“I am not cute!”

Sensing that his intended wasn’t really angry with him, the red speedster laughed and poked gently at the smaller mech’s side. “Whatever you say, Mims.”

Their drinks arrived shortly after, an oil for Rodimus and a weak spritzer for Minimus. As they settled down in their chairs to watch the bots on the dance floor, the young prime accidently brushed his forearm against the other mech’s hand. “Sorry, didn’t mean to bump you.”

The green mech turned slightly to look at his intended. There was something unreadable in his optics as he reached and retook Rodimus’ hand in his own. “May we talk?”

“Uh, sure. Is everything okay?” 

The speedster forced his sudden anxiety down as Minimus turned a dark red gaze on him. “Do you remember how I requested that we wait to interface?”

The question stunned Rodimus and he nearly gulped the mouthful of his drink he’d been taking. “Uh, y-yeah. You said you didn’t want to. I’m cool with that. Why?” As he spoke, Rodimus feverishly replayed everything he’d said and done, fearing that he’d somehow given the impression that he was pushing or was otherwise impatient. Really, he didn’t mind waiting at all.

“Well,” Minimus shifted in his chair, fiddling with his straw as he looked down at the counter. He began tracing the wetness at the bottom of his drink as he continued. “Well, I want you to-“

“Roddy! Minimus!”

Both mechs turned at the sound of Drift’s voice to find the white speedster making his way toward them. The swordsmech’s field bubbled with excitement as he spoke. “It’s great to see you out of the medbay, sir. We were all kind of worried. What with the Magnus armor being damaged and such.”

The green bot blinked quickly as he regained his composure. “Oh, of course. Thank you, Drift.”

The TIC then turned his gaze upon his amica. “Hey, I thought you wanted to spar before your shift?”

“Yeah, yeah, I do. I wanted to stop and refuel before taking Mims home.”

“Oh, gotcha. I’ll meet you there then, okay?”

“You got it.”

As Drift retreated with a wink and made his way out, Rodimus looked down at the former Enforcer at his side. “Now what were you saying? About interfacing?”

Minimus distracted himself by taking another thoughtful sip from his spritzer. “Oh. Nevermind. We can talk about it later.”

“You sure?”

“Yes, I am sure.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I love using my abnormal psychology degree at last lol


	38. Chapter 38

Upon dropping off Minimus at his hab and making sure that the green mech was comfortable, Rodimus raced off to meet Drift at the sparring center. He was in desperate need to relieve some tension and knew that a good sparring match with his amica would do the trick.

Transforming back into his root mode, Rodimus twisted in midair to land gracefully on his peds. “Hey, Drift! Where are you?” He stepped further into the mat, pulling a   
long metal rod from the rack as he went. “You ready to get your aft handed to you?”

He felt the vibrations on the floor almost too late.

Rodimus dropped low on his hauches just in time for Drift to leap cleanly over him. The white speedster spun to land on his ped even though he skidded several feet backward with his wasted momentum. “Nice job! I would’ve thought you’d be rusty.”

“Not a chance. Plus, you’re predictable Drifter.”

“Excuse me?!”

Drift launched himself at his amica with an angerless snarl and Rodimus rose to meet the frontal attack. He used his bar to block the downward swing of his partner. Just as the prime expected him to, Drift tried to knee him in the hip joint while both of his hands were above his helm and distracted. Rodimus twisted his hips in time to feel the blow fall uselessly to the side.

The TIC stepped back and squared off with his opponent, optics shining warmly. “You know all my tricks don’t you?”

Rodimus grinned back playfully. “I doubt it.”

“You’d be right.”

The pair continued battling each other, dodging and landing blows as they danced around the mat. The speedsters were a flurry of color, bending and twisting as neither gave ground or took it for very long. Eventually, they switched to swords and found that Rodimus was less fluent in his bladework.

After a particularly clumsy attempt at a reposte (which ended in Drift clocking him hard over the audial), Rodimus called for a break. The young prime wobbled to the sidelines, venting hard as his amica followed after him. “Not too bad, Roddy. Actually, that wasn’t bad at all.”

In response, the prime waved his hand impatiently. “Clearly, I have a ton of catching up to do.”

“You know I’m always happy to help you.” Even as the other mech laughed, Rodimus was nodding. Drift let his amusement taper off. “Wait. You actually wanna learn for once? Usually I have to beg you to spar. Why the change of spark?”

Rodimus batted at his amica. “I don’t know, something Rung said a while ago. It was about making myself better for me instead of for someone else.” The captain offered his friend a suggestive wink. “Besides, it wouldn’t hurt to impress Mims.”

Drift pursed his lips and darted narrowed optics at his amica. “How’s it been going with him?”

“Pretty good I think. He’s special to me.”

“So have you guys…?”

Minimus’ request for privacy in the berth flashed briefly through Rodimus’ processor. “I don’t think he’d want me to talk about it. He’s kinda private about that stuff.”

Drift’s optics went wide. “Mech, you guys are serious then if you’ve talked about that.”

“Yeah, I guess so. After what happened with… after what happened, he and I have gotten closer. More serious.”

Ever wise in his introspection, the swordsmech nodded solemnly. “That makes sense. Either one of you could’ve died.”

“Gee, Drifter. Thanks for the reminder.”

“I’m serious!” The white speedster swung to his peds and offered his hand to the prime. Effortlessly, he hauled his amica up after himself. “Stuff like that means something to a couple. He walked in ready to die trying to save you.”

“You- you really think so?”

“Listen, Roddy. When I was with him, he told me that I was to get you out of that room. So that’s what I did. He was willing to be the sacrifice while I got you out. If he hasn’t told you yet, that mech definitely loves you.”

Rodimus looked away, feeling his face flush. “He has.”

“He has what?”

“He’s told me that he loves me.”

The young prime jumped when his amica punched him in the arm. “Ultra Magnus said he loved you? THE Ultra Magnus? And you didn’t tell me?!”

Rodimus giggled as he was tackled by his best friend. They tumbled to the floor, a jumble of red and white. “I’ve been busy! If I’d known you’d take me down, I wouldn’t have told you at all.”

Drift pulled back and gave him a look of fake betrayal. “Oh, now that’s just cold. I tell you everything-“

“But Mims is super private about that stuff.” The red speedstwer pushed apology into his field as he spoke. Even though he loved Drift with all his spark, he had to respect his intended’s wishes.

“Don’t feel bad, I’m just playing.” Drift finally released his fellow speedster after delivering a final tickle to Rodimus’ finials. “I’m glad you feel that way about him. That level of respect is… well. It’s pretty special, Roddy. I’m happy for you.”

The red speedster nuzzled against his amica’s helm as they sat on the floor of the training center. “Thanks for understanding, Drift. What would I do without you?”

“You’ll never have to worry about that again” The swordsmech placed a kiss on the red mech’s cheek. He knew that Rodimus still felt guilt from sending his amica away so many cycles ago. “I love you, Roddy.”

“I love you too, Drifter.”


	39. Chapter 39

It was a long shift on the bridge. Though a great distance was covered, the duration of it was largely uneventful. Rodimus had to fight to stay awake as the shift drug on. While he waited for it to end, he managed to finish some of the reports that Ultra Mganus would usually be hounding him about. As he slowly completed them one by one, the young prime reminded himself that he was doing it for his own betterment… though seeing Minimus smile was a good side motivation.

When it finally did come to an end, Rodimus found himself fully awake as he journeyed back to his hab. It was strange knowing that his intended was there waiting for him and the thought made his peds move all the more quickly. Rounding the corners and barely paying attention to the bots who greeted him, the young prime arrived at his habsuite in record time.

“Minimus, I was wondering if-“

Rodimus paused when he saw the couch. He had left the small mech there earlier, wrapped in the only blanket the prime owned and with a cube of medical grade on the sidetable. But now the televid was off, it’s screen black and the remote resting on the couch’s arm. The cube of medical energon was gone as were Minimus and the blanket.

Worry crept into his processor as the speedster made his way further into the silent hab. There was no sign of a scuffle or any kind of distress on Minimus’ part. The door had been locked just as Rodimus had left it. “Mims?” His voice had dropped to a whisper as he made his way through the dimly lit quarters. “Minimus, you here?”

He saw that his berthroom door was cracked slightly. Usually it was open wide. “Mims?”

Pushing the door open slowly, Rodimus peeked inside. What he saw made his spark swell and spin quickly in his chest.

The slight form of Minimus Ambus lay curled into a tight ball on the center of the large berth. The little green mech had swathed himself in the blanket Rodimus gave him earlier, fists clutching the yellow material to his face. He didn’t stir when Rodimus came further into the room.

Careful not to move the berth too much, the red speedster sat down on the edge and stared down at his intended. Minimus’ facial insignia was barely visible under the old blanket, twitching slightly as the mech recharged. Occasionally, a ped could be seen shifting under the covers and Rodimus wondered briefly if the former Enforcer was dreaming.

He hated to wake the resting mech, but the prime needed Minimus to finish the medical grade cube. Upon entering the berthroom, Rodimus had spotted it, still over half-full, sitting on the nightstand. “Hey, Mims, you have to wake up now. You gotta finish this medical grade.” Rodimus reached out to slowly pet the stirring mech’s arm though the blanket. 

Minimus shifted until he lay on his back, red optics flickering online to find his intended sitting beside him. The beautiful speedster was smiling down at him, his field swirling to meet the former Enforcer’s in a gentle caress. Minimus found himself reaching out with both his field and his arms.

Rodimus leaned gladly down to pull his intended against him. The smaller mech pressed a sleepy kiss against the prime’s neck cables before sighing through his vents. Above him, the speedster returned the gesture with a gentle touch of his lips to the green mech’s helm. “How did you recharge?”

The little bot didn’t answer and instead kissed more fervently at the other’s throat cables. Rodimus’ felt himself stiffen as one of his fuel lines was pulled into a small, warm mouth. “Oh~”

Pulling back and away, the prime carefully dipped his helm until he could pull Minimus into a sweet, insistent kiss. The smaller mech reacted instantly, pulling Rodimus’ lower lip between his denta to bite down. A choked sound left the captain’s vocalizer as he settled himself half on top of his berthmate, pushing the other down more firmly into the berth.

Minimus clearly had a talented glossa, allowing it to take complete control of the kiss as he guided the usually confident prime further onto the berth. Rodimus found himself completely overwhelmed by the smaller mech’s field and touch. Low in his belly, he felt the familiar build of arousal burning. When Minimus moaned softly and rested a hand on the back of the bigger mech’s helm, Rodimus knew that whatever they were about to do wouldn’t last long. “Minimus- mmm- “

The former Enforcer froze at the mention of his name, body going completely still. Even his lips stopped moving against the speedster’s. Within a klik, Rodimus found himself almost blinded as scarlet optics flew open and panic filled the field against his own. Beneath him, Minimus began struggling to get out of his arms. It was as if the litte green mech had suddenly awakened fully and realized what was happening.

While Rodimus tried to figure out what exactly had gone wrong, Minimus processor was a panicked jumble. When he finally managed to maneuver himself out from under the other mech, he crab-crawled backward so quickly that his helm slammed against the wall at the head of the berth. He took a moment to shake off the pain it caused before looking back down at the still confused Rodimus.

The speedster was looking increasingly upset as he floundered backward to land on the floor in a heap. Rodimus was immediately on his peds again, his optics fixed on anything but the vincinity that Minimus occupied. It wasn’t until the former Enforcer could clearly see the prime’s face that he realized Rodimus was mumbling to himself, field wild with distress, confusion and pain. “I’m so sorry, so sorry-“

“Rodimus-”

The red mech seemed to cave in on himself. “ _You’re _sorry? I pushed and I- I-“__

__It became clear that Rodimus was about to flee the room. Hurrying to fix the mess he’d accidently made, Minimus fought his way out of the rest of the covers and stumbled over to his intended. Rodimus reached to touch him, but immediately withdrew. “What did I do wrong, Mims? I am so sorry, believe me, I didn’t mean to-“_ _

__“Come here, Rodimus.”_ _

__The prime gave the door a final glance before allowing himself to be embraced by the smaller mech. Minimus petted the other mech’s spoiler, the appendage spasming with fear-fueled energy. “Listen to me. It wasn’t your fault at all, do you understand? I simply… forgot myself for a moment.”_ _

__Rodimus looked at him with bright optics. “What do you mean?”_ _

__“I mean that I was not thinking clearly when I acted. You was not at fault.”_ _

__“What did I do to make you so upset, Mims?”_ _

__Minimus drew a breath in through his vents. “You said my name.”_ _

__The speedster looked at him with guarded curiosity. “Do you… not like me saying it when we do things? If that’s what it is, then-“_ _

__“No, no, my prime. It- It simply reminded me of something related to what we were doing. You see-“_ _

__A comm. pinged in Minimus’ helm then, interrupting his train of thought. He was about to resume his conversation with Rodimus when he saw that the sender of the comm. was Ratchet. “I have a comm. from the medbay. Give me one moment.”_ _

__Stepping away from the still nervous prime, the former-Enforcer opened the comm. The medic’s voice immediately echoes in his helm. :I am with Perceptor and Brainstorm in the medbay. They have completed repairs on your armor.:_ _

__Glancing to make sure his intended hadn’t slipped away, Minimus answered the comm. :Good. When may I wear it again?:_ _

__:I will run some tests before I turn you loose with it. You can come down now if you want to.:_ _

__:I shall be there shortly then.:_ _

__Minimus turned back to his intended to find Rodimus staring at the floor. The green bot’s attention was drawn to the movement of the prime’s right hand and saw that speedster begun the habit of picking the paint off of his left palm. Returning to stand in front of his beloved companion, the smaller mech reached to take the freshly injured golden hand into his own._ _

__Sheepishly, Rodimus looked away as Minimus kissed the sore spot, now void of smooth paint. “Rodimus, do you remember what I said about doing this to yourself?”_ _

__“Y-Yes.”_ _

__“What did I say?”_ _

__The prime swallowed thickly. “You said you’d rather I hurt you than myself.”_ _

__The green mech placed another soft kiss to the damaged palm. He suppressed a sigh when he saw that the injury was mainly cosmetic. “It is good that we are headed ot the medbay. Ratchet commed to notify me that the Magnus armor had been repaired.”_ _

__“That’s great. I know that you’ve been missing it. Hey, why don’t you just go on? I wanna stay here if that’s okay.”_ _

__Minimus couldn’t keep the dismay out of his field as he studied the avoidant prime. Rodimus hadn’t looked at him the whole time he’d been speaking, his voice soft and wavering. The green mech took the golden hand in both of his. “Do you truly wish to stay here?” The brief hesitation to answer on the prime’s part gave Minimus his answer. “Then come along with me. Perhaps we shall see if Brainstorm altered it after all, hm?”_ _

__Slowly, Rodimus lifted his helm, optics shining. “You were trying to tell me something. When Ratchet commed. Mims, are we okay?”_ _

__“Of course we are okay, Rodimus.” How had he managed to almost ruin everything so quickly? Though he appeared calm and collected on the outside, Minimus was a mess. Did the prime truly think that they weren’t okay? “I didn’t mean to scare you-“_ _

__“I don’t think- um-“ The speedster was pulling away, field retreating from where it seemed to always be brushing Minimus’ these days. Rodimus cleared his vocalizer twice. “I don’t think I can do this.”_ _

__“Rodimus-“_ _

__But the prime was backing away, optics glassy. He’d begun picking at his hand again and Minimus watched as tiny flecks of gold paint sprinkled the floor between them. “Mims- Minimus- I-“_ _

__The former Enforcer understood what was happening then. “Do you wish for me to leave?”_ _

__A small nod answered him._ _

__It felt more like a dream as Minimus turned to walk out of the berthroom and into the main living area. His field felt strangely numb, like he couldn’t manipulate it or feel anything at all. The small mech’s throat felt like it was closing and his spark was trying to crawl up his intake. He’d never felt so cold in all the cycles he’d lived as he heard the habsuite door close behind him._ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please don't kill me.


	40. Chapter 40

It had been three shifts since he’d last seen Minimus. 

Rodimus had sent a brief comm. to Drift, asking that the swordsmech find a cover for his shift on the bridge. Though the TIC had asked what was wrong, Rodimus hadn’t known what to say or how to act yet. He’d ended up making an excuse about being a little sore after sparring and going to see Ratchet about it.

Of course, the story fell apart when Drift had asked his conjunx how Rodimus was, only to find that Ratchet had never seen the captain at all.

Now, Drift was outside the habsuite door. “Roddy? Hey, you okay in there? What’s going on?”

The prime ignored his amica and buried his face deeper into the covers. His HUD flashed that he was low on fuel, but he dismissed the warning. 

Why had he sent Minimus away? The little green mech had done nothing wrong, really. Rodimus had come in, woken him up, and misread the situation. Badly. Now, the prime had to deal with the fallout.

“Rodimus, please let me in-“

Rodimus opened a comm. to his amica. :I don’t want to talk right now.:

:Roddy? Are you okay? Ratchet says he hasn’t seen you. I didn’t mean to go so hard sparring-:

:It wasn’t that at all.: The prime felt as if he were about to break. He knew that he deserved to be alone with his inadequacies, but at the same time he desperately needed Drift. :It’s Minimus.:

A pause came over the comm. :Are you guys okay?:

:No, I made him leave. I messed up and I don’t know what to do.:

There was no comm. in return as two voices could be heard deliberating outside in the hall. One was clearly Drift’s, the other was deeper and gruff. Probably Ratchet.

Rodimus didn’t move as a medical override was entered into his habsuite keypad. The prime soon heard two pairs of peds making their way toward his berthroom, one coming significantly faster than the other. Even as the berthroom door opened, the prime continued to remain motionless on the berth. Movement took too much energy away from his mourning.

A hand landed on Rodimus’ limp spoiler and Drift slowly began drawing out his amica’s field with his own. “Have you fueled recently, sweetspark?”

Rodimus kept his face buried in the pillow and shook his helm in the negative. A klik later, the heavier peds retreated out of the berthroom wordlessly, their owner off to get fuel for the mech on the berth.

Drift’s presence had always been a balm to Rodimus’s field and spark, offering unconditional love and reassurance. Today, heiver, the other mech’scaring touch only made the prime cry harder. Drift continued to gently massage away the tension in his amica’s frame and Rodimus mumbled into the fabric. Quiet, choking sobs distorted the words in his vocalizer. “I- I didn’t m-mean- I didn’t want to-“

“Shh, calm down, Roddy. Don’t worry about it right now. We’ll get some fuel into you and then we can talk. Until then, try to relax. I’m sure it’s not as bad as you think it is.”

“I-I made him leave, Drift. I messed up and n-now- now-“

The heavy peds returned to the doorway as the red speedster rolled over a little. Rodimus fixed blurry optics on Drift as Ratchet came back into the room. Without any of the complaining or chastising that he was known for, the old medic placed the cube of energon in Rodimus’ hands when the prime wriggled to sit up. 

He wasn’t hungry, but the watchful glare of the silent medic convinced Rodimus to sip at the cube. The whole time, Drift swept his hands in comforting caresses across his amica’s plating. Slowly, the prime felt himself beginning to calm down. He leaned against his amica who folded him into an embrace. “What happened?”

Quickly and with a halting vocalizer, Rodimus relayed what had happened when he got back from his shift on the bridge. He detailed the way Minimus had reacted when things started to heat up and how the green mech had tried to smooth things over immediately after. But the smaller mech had seemed so repulsed-

At the end of the story, Ratchet spoke for the first time since arriving at the prime’s hab. “He wasn’t upset with you, Rodimus. It was with himself. I cannot divulge medical histories because I am sworn to maintain the privacy of my patients. But I know that talking with him would clear things up immensely.”

“He has to hate me… He wanted to stay here! And I told him to leave! Why am I so-“

“Hey!” Drift moved until he could look at the mech in his arms. “I’m sure that he doesn’t hate you. This whole thing sounds like a big misunderstanding.”

“I just want to be good for him and when I made him upset, I didn’t know what to do! I panicked and now it’s ruined.”

Ratchet stepped forward from where he’d been leaning against the doorframe. “Enough of this. You’re overthinking this completely. If you would just talk to him, everything would be resolved.” The former CMO’s face softened when he saw the prime’s tear-streaked face. “Listen to me, Rodimus. He doesn’t hate you at all. He’s probably just confused and hurt. Primus knows he’d never show it though.”

Rodimus sniffed before taking another drink from the cube. The energon felt sour in his twisting tanks, sitting heavily in the otherwise empty space. He wanted to hide from everything and everyone, to disintegrate into the covers on his berth. But Ratchet’s optimism, no matter how roughly across it came, gave the young prime’s spark a glimmer of hope.

Ratchet sat down on the berth beside the two speedsters. “Rodimus, you need to talk to him. When he came to get his armor, he couldn’t pay attention for more than three or four kliks at a time. The mech is just as torn up over this as you are.”

“Where is he?”

“His shift on the bridge will end soon.”

The captain looked away from the medic. “I don’t know. He was pretty upset when it all happened. It was like he didn’t want me touching him.”

Ratchet snorted when Drift started to speak. “Rodimus, have you ever seen Ultra Magnus go into Swerve’s and not write a single citation? Or better, have you ever seen Ultra Magnus actually _drink _?”__

__That caught Rodimus’ attention. “He- He drank at Swerve’s?”_ _

__Ratchet continued as Drift nodded solemnly. “Yes, he did. Just one, mind you, but still.” The old ambulance leaned forward, optics flashing. “Magnus isn’t the most emotional mech that I know. That’s why one of you needs to mech up and talk it out.”_ _

__Was the whole thing really just a big misunderstanding? Maybe they were right to some degree. But they hadn’t seen Minimus in his mad rush to get away from the prime, or the way the smaller mech’s field withdrew to leave only cold air, or- “You weren’t there. He doesn’t want anything to do with me and I don’t know how to fix what I did wrong because I don’t really know what it was.”_ _

__The old medic sighed before he stood and left the room. Drift watched him go before resting his helm on top of his amica’s. “Are you sure you don’t want to talk to him? It might help you understand why he acted the way he did.”_ _

__Wordlessly, Rodimus pulled away from his friend and gave the swordsmech an empty smile. “I’ll be alright. Tell Ratch thanks for the energon and I’ll be up for my next shift, okay? We don’t want Magnus to yell about unfinished reports or me being late again.”_ _

__His friend didn’t laugh or agree. As the red speedster settled back down on the berth, Drift watched his captain pull the yellow blanket up to press it against his haggard face. As the prime inhaled through his vents quietly and closed his optics, the white speedster stood and left the hab._ _


	41. Chapter 41

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for all the sad, y'all. But fear not! It's about to get REAL good...

“Sir? Sir, are you alright?”

Ultra Magnus blinked quickly before willing his optics to focus on the mech in front of him. The femme, one new to bridge duty, was watching him with curious worry. “Yes. Yes the reports. Please give them to me before you leave at the end of you shift.”

He watched as the femme nodded, her designation escaping him as she made her way back to her station. Usually, Magnus would be able to remember the names of every crew member on his bridge-

The towering mech shook his helm before moving to check his HUD. The shift was almost over. Thank Primus. He wasn’t sure what he would do after it commenced, but it had to be better than pretending everything was normal on the bridge.

Instead of celebrating the return of his armor with Rodimus, as he had hoped he would, Ultra Magnus had made his way to Swerve’s. He wasn’t usually one to drink high grade in any form. But with the memory file of the prime’s dejected face clear in his processor, the former Enforcer was determined to go to any lengths to sooth the pain in his spark.

Rodimus had looked so distraught. It was no wonder the prime had wanted to be left alone after the way Minimus had acted. If he’d only had a chance to explain-

“Magnus.”

At the sound of his name, the blue mech turned to find a glaring swordsmech standing behind him. “Drift. How can I help you?”

“You have to talk to him. He thinks it’s his fault.”

The bigger mech looked around the bridge to find no one paying any mind to their whispered conversation. “Drift, I hardly think that this is the time or the place-“

The TIC advanced slightly, denta gritted. “Rodimus has been locked in his hab this whole time thinking that he’s caused you some kind of trauma and here you are on the slagging bridge like everything is fine. Roddy can’t even refuel because he’s so upset.”

“This is not the appropriate place for this discussion. There is also the obvious fact that Rodimus does not want me in his hab.”

“Rodimus didn’t know what to do! He panicked thinking he’d ruined everything because he thought you thought he was pushing you so now he wants to talk but doesn’t think you want to see him anymore because-”

“He… thinks this was his fault?” Ultra Magnus’ optics widened slightly at the revelation, but he managed to keep his field neutral. “Rodimus thinks it is _I _who doesn’t want to see _him _?”____

____Drift’s helm bobbed with almost comical speed and the former Enforcer felt his spark drop. He was about to explain that he couldn’t go until the end of his shift when he realizedthat it was Radius who was supposed to take over for him. Before the blue mech could even voice the question, the swordsmech in front rolled his optics. “I’m here in his place. Go see him.”_ _ _ _

____ _ _

____~o0o~_ _ _ _

____ _ _

____Rodimus finally managed to roll himself out of his berth. The prime knew before he looked in his washracks mirror that the thin metal under his optics was dark stained from lack of recharge. Even with the cube of energon that Ratchet and Drift brought earlier, his tanks were sore and empty again._ _ _ _

____Pain echoed in his helm, likely from the blow during sparring practice. Rodimus cursed as he stumbled on his way from the washracks, optics blurry with old, dried tears. The prime fluffed his plating before he tried to get it laying flat and smooth against his protoform. He would usually take a shower to relax the worst of the kinks, but decided against it in the end._ _ _ _

____Briefly, he considered saving his private stash and going to Swerve’s. He wouldn’t be alone if he went out. But at the same time, he wanted to be by himself, in the quiet of his hab. It served as a reminder of what he could’ve had if he hadn’t messed everything up. Slowly, he made his way over to one of the few cabinets by the televid set._ _ _ _

____Pulling one out, the young prime didn’t waste time with reading the label or getting out a glass. He simply broke the seal and drank it down in heavy gulps. The faster it hit his tanks, the sooner the voice in his helm would shut up._ _ _ _

____It was Megatron’s voice, whispering in his audials. The speedster was jumpy as he imagined large black hands pinching his spoiler and tweeking his finials. Rodimus shook his helm violently as he reached for another bottle, and then another, starting to feel a little dizzy already. Nothing like highgrade on an empty tank-_ _ _ _

____A knock at the door._ _ _ _

____“Rodimus? Are you there?”_ _ _ _

____The third bottle he’d been about to open tumbled from his shaking hands and it dispersed on the floor with a crash. Expensive wine splattering across Rodimus’ peds, but he speedster barely flinched. “M-Mags?”_ _ _ _

____The deep voice was tentative. “What was- Can I speak with you? Please?”_ _ _ _

____Rodimus looked down at the energon smeared all over the floor and felt his optics cross a little. Maybe he shouldn’t have drank so fast after all. “Uh, sure. Just hold on a klik.”_ _ _ _

____The prime forced his optics to see straight as he searched for a towel by the washracks. By the time he finally found one, he was certain that the blue mech outside would’ve left. Panicked by the thought, he slurred. “’Ey Mags, you still out there? It’ll only be a-“_ _ _ _

____Hurrying, Rodimus bent to sop up the worst of the spill, hoping that he could somehow hide what he'd been doing from the former Enforcer. But before he knew what had happened, the speedster found himself falling forward. Though he tried to catch himself, Rodimus failed and, with an undignified squeal, fell directly into the mess he’d made on the floor. As the prime continued thrashing on the floor's slick surface and trying to clean up the spill, he succeeded in getting more of the sparkling pink fluid on himself than on the towel in his hand. He had just paused for a moment, praying to Primus for the swirling colors in his processor to abate, when he heard a beep at the door._ _ _ _

____He barely had time to sit up before Ultra Magnus stepped inside._ _ _ _


	42. Chapter 42

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I actually wrote this chapter like two months ago. This whole fic is based around it. Enjoy:)

When Ultra Magnus spotted the young prime on the floor, body splayed awkwardly in a pool of pink fluid, the blue mech assumed the worst. He was in motion immediately, moving toward the mech on the floor. “Rodimus, are you alright?”

The speedster blinked up at Magnus. Rodimus’ optics cycled slowly, not quite focusing on the mech above him. “Mags! Hey!”

Rodimus scrambled around for a klik or two, trying his best to climb onto his peds before he eventually gave up. The prime settled for leaning back against the wall and studying his visitor with an exaggerated smile. “Didn’t ‘spect to see you today. Or ever. How’s the bridge?” 

Moving slowly, the SIC knelt before the captain. It soon became clear that Rodimus wasn’t injured. The smell of highgrade assaulted the blue mech’s olfactory sensors. When he reached to touch the young prime, Rodimus yanked away and swatted at his hand. Despite how frustrating it was, Ultra Magnus couldn’t help but find the sparkling-like action cute. Especially when it was coupled with the young prime’s pouting lips. “Rodimus, let me help you-“

“Why’re you ‘ere?” Rodimus glared at his hands where they lay limply in his lap. He sniffed, his lazy optics quickly welling with tears. In a softer voice, the prime mumbled to himself. “Stupid ‘ighgrade dreams.”

“I assure you, I am no dream. I am here because I care deeply for you and I believe that there has been a misunderstanding between us.”

“You don’ wanna in’erface. I know.” The speedster leaned forward as he tried again to get his peds under himself. He slipped and collapsed on his aft again with a frustrated hiss. Rodimus fixed sad optics on Ultra Magnus. “Megs said this would ‘appen. I’m dirty and you wouldn’t wanna do stuff like that with me. He’s always right- always right…”

“Rodimus…” The blue mech felt as if his spark would cease turning as he looked down at the dejected mech on the floor. What could he say to that? Of course Megatron wasn’t telling the truth. What had happened to Rodimus was far from why Magnus wanted to wait before interfacing. “May I hold you?”

The prime turned big blue optics on the blue mech and nodded after a moment of hesitating. Ultra Magnus carefully leaned forward as he spoke, wrapping Rodimus in his arms. “You must listen carefully to me when I tell you that Megatron could not be more wrong in his assumption.”

“Big words...”

“Megatron was wrong. I love you very much, far more than I ever thought I was able to.”

The woozy mech’s optics were nearly white with overcharge as he looked at the other mech. “You really do? But why did you-“

“I shall explain everything soon. First, I believe that you need to recharge.”

Rodimus hiccupped quietly from where he settled his helm against Ultra Magnus’ collar faring. “I didn’ mean to upset you- don’ know how to fix it-” Another hiccup. “Gotta fix it. I love you too.”

“There is nothing to fix on your part, little love. I have failed to communicate successfully. It is no fault of yours and I am deeply sorry.”

The smaller mech stiffened slightly when Magnus lifted him from the floor and into his arms. The bigger mech could hear the sloshing within the speedster’s chassis, a definite sign of a souring tank. Rodimus moaned lowly and buried his face against the other’s neck. “I don’ feel so good.”

Slowly and holding his precious cargo against his chest, the former Enforcer carried Rodimus toward the berthroom. “Just relax and try to recharge. I’ll be here when you wake.”

Magnus placed the prime in the center of the berth and went about wiping the worst of the mess from Rodimus’ plating with the towel. The smaller mech groaned as he tried batting the former Enforcer’s hands away, irritation coloring his hazy field. Ultra Magnus finished cleaning the his charge as best that he could before moving away. 

“Stay? Please? Don’ leave ‘gain, I’ll be good, promise.”

The glyphs were terribly slurred, but Magnus understood them all the same. “Of course, my prime.”

After the bigger mech had settled on the berth and the much smaller prime had cuddled up against him, Rodimus pushed his mouth against his berthmate’s chest plate. His murmur was so soft that Ultra Magnus wondered if he was meant to hear it at all. 

“I love you, Mags. So much.”

A kiss landed on the top of the speedster’s helm as he began to snore through his vents. “And I love you, Rodimus.”

 

~o0o~

 

As he crawled up out of recharge’s fog, Rodimus registered two things at once. First, his helm ached in a way that only highgrade could make one’s helm ache. Secondly… that had been a wonderful dream.

Magnus had come back. He’d been there in the hab, cuddling Rodimus to himself and whispering such nice things. The blue mech had lifted him from where he’d fallen out in the living area and had cleaned him up before putting him to berth. The prime could almost feel the warmth of the other mech’s chassis against his plating…

Rodimus hated highgrade dreams.

Squirming around in the covers, the speedster found himself alone, just as he suspected that he would. A single check to his HUD had him cursing. His shift was long over and there was no doubt that he would get an audial-full from Ultra Magnus about it.

He swung his peds over the side of the berth. Having the former Enforcer yell at him would help. It would almost be like old times, back when Megatron was beating sense into him and the crew hated him and he hated himself and Magnus was just a distant wish-

There was a cube on his nightstand, new and still sealed.

Rodimus didn’t remember leaving it there. Cautiously, he reached forward to take the cube in trembling fingers. When his hand touched it, his tanks grumbled deep in his chassis, telling him of his low fuel statis. The prime took the cube of midgrade in hand and broke the seal before chugging it in one go.

“Do you always refuel like somebot will take it from you?”

The voice came from the berthroom doorway and nearly made Rodimus choke with surprise. He sputtered on the fuel still in his intake as he spotted Ultra Magnus in the doorway. “What are you doing here?”

Had it not been a dream? Because if it wasn’t… The prime’s cheeks glowed furiously where he sat on the berth, the empty cube still clutched in his hands. He was never going to live this down. “I can explain-“

As Rodimus began to formulate some kind of excuse, the former Enforcer chuckled softly and came further into the room. “There is no need to be embarrassed, my prime. You did nothing that would damage my opinion of you.”

“But why are you here? I really thought it was a dream…”

Ultra Magnus came to a stop as he towered over the mech still sitting on the berth. His optics were soft when he looked down at Rodimus. “I have failed to communicate things to you clearly. For that, I am sorry.”

The prime looked away, fiddling with the empty cube in his hands. His brow was furrowed, still trying to remember what he’d said when he was drunk. But the blue mech’s searching gaze directly in front of him was making it hard to remember. “I think… you made everything pretty clear earlier.”

“Rodimus.”

The red speedster watched as Ultra Magnus knelt before him on the floor. He felt his cheeks rapidly heating again and he reached to try and pull the other mech to his feet. “Get up, Mags, you don’t have to do this. I’m not mad or anything, alright? We can just-“

A single look from the mech on his knees silenced the young prime immediately. The former Enforcer tilted his helm forward just enough to press his mouth against the other mech’s chest plates, right over the smaller mech’s spark. When he pulled away, he fixed bright optics on Rodimus. “Is it too late for me to tell you how I feel?” The prime shook his helm ‘no.’ “Then may I try?”

Unsure of what to make of the other mech’s actions and questions, Rodimus nodded slowly. The former Enforcer took both of the speedster’s golden hands in his own. Ultra Magnus’ voice was low, his gaze full of heat, as he began.

“I failed you when I allowed you to feel undesired and unwanted. The near loss of you many times over has allowed me to see what I cannot go without. And I cannot go without you, my prime.” The field of the former Enforcer was all around the red mech, bathing him in warmth and serenity as Ultra Magnus lifted the smaller mech’s hands and kissed them. His optics never once left Rodimus’ face.

“I desire to make love to you, Rodimus of Nyon, until you are too weak to stand. I wish to pleasure you in every way that I can so that I may hear you cry out my name with every breath. I long to be the cause of those beautiful sounds that your release creates…” 

As he continued, the bigger mech leaned in until all that Rodimus could see were the intense optics of his intended. “I want to worship you with my mouth, with my hands, with everything that you will allow me too. You have my spark, Rodimus. I am determined to make your worth in my optics ever clear, both with my words and in the berth from now on.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *screams and dissolved into tears*


	43. Chapter 43

Rodimus didn’t know what to say. No one had ever said such beautiful, wonderful things to him. It caused a lump to form in the prime’s throat that he couldn’t quite swallow down. 

Refusing to cry in front of the blue mech again, Rodimus tried to reply. So many things were going on his his processor as he looked at the mech kneeling before him. Love, fear, excitement, the unmistakable burn of desire. After flapping his mouth for a few moments, he gave up and settled for leaning forward to wrap his arms around Ultra Magnus’ neck. 

The big mech didn’t hesitate to wrap his own arms around the speedster and set about stroking the trembling spoiler on Rodimus’ back. “My prime?”

“Primus, Magnus, that was… woah. Just- Primus.”

A deep chuckle came from the SIC as Rodimus pushed his face against the side of the other mech’s helm. “I am uncertain as to whether or not even Primus understands the depth of how I feel for you, Rodimus.”

“You’ve gotta stop that.”

“Stop what?”

“Talking to me like that. You’ve already got me in the berth, if that’s what you’re trying to do.”

Another laugh, this time coupled with a kiss to Rodimus’ audial. “Ah, Rodimus. I would say such things even if you did not want to share your berth with me.”  
Rodimus pulled back enough so that he could look straight into Ultra Magnus’ optics. “I want to. I really want to.”

The former Enforcer continued delivering light kisses down the side of the young prime’s helm. Abruptly, he caught the tip of Rodimus’ finial in his denta and bit down. Surprised by the sudden action, the speedster had no time to suppress his his yelp as a streak of arousal shot through his field. Ultra Magnus proceeded to smooth away the lingering burn with his glossa, dragging it across the bruised metal before he spoke. “How do you wish to proceed, my little prime?”

Rodimus had trouble thinking clearly as Magnus went about licking, sucking and biting down his exposed throat. Without realizing it, the prime began to rock his hips against the mech in front of him. As the bigger mech moved lower and lower, reaching Rodimus chest plate to leave cool trails of oral lubricant across the plating, the speedster bent over the other’s helm to whisper into his audial. “I want you to spike me, Mags. I wanna feel you inside me.”

A guttural moan came from the blue mech and his arms tightened around the prime’s waist. “I would not be opposed to that.”

Ultra Magnus released the captain from his embrace to cradle slender red hips in his hands. The size difference between them was just enough so that he could’ve easily encircled Rodimus’ slender waist with his fingers. The former Enforcer spent a few kliks admiring the gorgeous speedster frame before him as he used his thumbs to massage the flaring biolights at Rodimus’ waist. “Rodimus, you are easily the most stunning mech that I have ever seen.” Magnus peppered the glittering biolights with kisses and watched them flicker as Rodimus’ spark spun faster. “You are also brave and strong. You do everything in your power to keep your crew safe.”

“Mags, I’m not-“

“You must believe these things, my prime. I have never lied to you. What I say is true and spark-felt.”

Ultra Magnus abandoned kissing the prime’s chassis and sat up once more to assault the speedster’s lips. Rodimus didn’t resist as he allowed the former Enforcer to lay claim to him with glossa and denta. The SIC licked his way into the other mech’s mouth, leaving no part of it unexplored.

Rodimus tried to focus as he felt Ultra Magnus’ large hands move lower to play with his hip joints, playing with the wires and cords. The whole time, the blue mech kept kissing his intended’s slack and willing mouth, wasting no time in dominating his smaller partner. It wasn’t long before Rodimus felt his frame weakening under the continuous assault. 

Magnus, never breaking their lips apart, stood from the floor. As he did, he allowed his hands to fall from the Rodimus’ waist to his aft. A klik after he felt those huge, scarred hands move to cup his rear, Rodimus felt himself being lifted up. The speedster allowed his thighs to fall open and the bigger mech moved between them. The new position sent arrows of arousal straight to the prime’s array just as his intended began to grind their modesty panels together.   
“Mmm- Mags- please- “

Ultra Magnus lowered the prime down onto the medberth with all of the reverence due something holy. He moved to kiss the smaller mech’s throat, his audials, his chest, anywhere that the former Enforcer’s mouth could reach. The blue mech listened as the prime beneath him tried to suppress his moans unsuccessfully. “Let me hear you, little love. Do not try to hide your pleasure from me.”

Another bite to his throat cables dissolved the remainder of Rodimus’ self-control. His modesty panel snapped open with an audible click and the speedster felt fresh air hit his bared array. His spike pressurized and surged out of it’s housing to slap against the former Enforcer’s torso, already leaking prefluid. The prime opened his mouth to apologize, but before he could, Ultra Magnus pushed himself up and off of the speedster. Rodimus watched, transfixed, as the former Enforcer moved down the berth to resettle on the floor. 

Though Rodimus had interfaced before, he felt naked for the first time as Ultra Magnus’ swept over his frame with hungry optics. But when their optics met, the prime knew that he had nothing to fear as he lay bare and open before this mech. There was nothing but adoration and love in Magnus’ gaze. “I love you, Rodimus.”

“I love you, too, Magnus.” Rodimus couldn’t look away from the other’s piercing optics as the blue mech dipped his face toward his array. A thousand processing trees were forming in his helm, a hundred insecurities piling up-

But it all came to a halt when Ultra Magnus slipped his glossa into the prime’s slick valve.

The bigger mech splayed his hand across Rodimus’ torso to hold the bucking speedster in place. Magnus lapped at the cycling calipers, tasting the sweet lubricant that flowed copiously from the valve’s clenching walls. He sealed his lips around the plump lips and suckled, feeling the energon pooling under the thin metal mesh as arousal continued to built in Rodimus’ field. Distantly, Ultra Magnus could hear the red mech’s desperate cries, so sweet to the audial, as the prime was inched closer and closer to his release.

Rodimus would’ve felt embarassed by his lack of control under other circumstances. He could feel the oral lubricants soaking his valve, coating his array in tingling coolness. The pressure was building quickly, so quickly-

“Mags- I- I’m gonna- Oh-“

The former Enforcer could feel the red mech’s body beginning to stiffen, his hips jerking sloppily as he got closer to his climax. He could hear Rodimus’ vocalizer, mumbling incoherently as sparks danced across the prime’s plating seams. The speedster, writhing as he came undone, was truly a work of art. “Come for me, my love- let go- “

Magnus wrapped his lips around his prime’s anterior node and, with a ragged gasp, Rodimus overloaded. As the speedster cried to the ceiling, optics rolling up into his helm, the former Enforcer continued to draw his glossa over the clenching valve in long, soothing strokes. The gentle sweeps helped lower the over-sensitive Rodimus down from the heights of his completion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *sighs happily*


	44. Chapter 44

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In which, Brainstorm is definitely getting a 'thank you' and a citation ;)

When the red mech’s vents finally began to even out and Rodimus’ anterior node had ceased to pulsate under Magnus’ glossa, the former Enforcer moved to insert the tip of his index finger into the prime’s drooling entrance. He was pleased when the loosened calipers didn’t even react to the intrusion, completely relaxed and pliant as he dragged the digit in and out.

As he descended from his post-overload haze, Rodimus became aware of an oscene sound from further down the berth. He blinked rapidly, trying to clear his helm as he sat up on shaky arms. When the prime looked between his legs, he spotted the source of the strange squelching. 

Ultra Magnus was focused completely as two of his fingers easily slid in and out of Rodimus’ sloppy valve. The array was absolutely smeared with lubricant, both of the prime’s own making and from Magnus’ mouth. The sight of his valve lips so easily parting around the bigger mech’s digits caused a fresh wave of desire to coil low in the speedster’s belly. “Mags, _please _-“__

__“I must make certain that you are not injured, Rodimus. I am significantly bigger than you in size.” The blue mech moved up onto the berth, his fingers never ceasing as they pumped leisurely in and out of his lover. He settled beside Rodimus on the berth and placed a kiss on the side of the prime’s helm._ _

__“C-Can you at least pop your panels then? This is feeling a little one-sided-.”_ _

__After a moment, Rodimus heard the telltale sound of a modesty panel sliding open. Then, a hiss. Rodimus was confused by the sound and he looked away from Ultra Magnus face, down to where the former Enforcer’s modesty panel had retracted._ _

__Magnus was _huge _.___ _

____The slowly pressurizing spike was thick and heavily ribbed. The head, scarlet and smeared with prefluid, was visibly sharp at the tip, perfectly suited for breaching another bot’s gestation chamber. Overall, the member was mostly plain silver with pale blue biolights that trailed up both sides. They twinkled as Rodimus stared at them, almost like they were teasing him._ _ _ _

____The prime doubted he’d ever beheld something so gloriously arousing in his lifecycle. Rodimus’ mouth began to lubricate as the blue mech repositioned himself higher on the berth, making the huge spike bob and leak against the covers. It looked so heavy, so inviting-_ _ _ _

____And then a soft sound came from Ultra Magnus, something that sounded like surprise. When Rodimus tore his optics from the delicious spike, he found the former Enforcer staring down at it like he didn’t recognize it. “Mags?”_ _ _ _

____Realization dawned in the SIC’s field as he reached a big hand down and gripped his spike, giving it a few tentative pulls. Soon after, he released his hold with a choking sound. The spike dribbled more fluid, it’s biolights blazing even more brightly. “It… is different.”_ _ _ _

____The prime wanted nothing more than to take the spike’s dripping head into his mouth and see just how loud he could get Ultra Magnus to be. Instead, he tried focusing on the other mech’s face. “Different how?”_ _ _ _

____“When the armor was being repaired… I believe that Brainstorm made some…” The big mech grunted as the spike twitched impatiently, its curve causing it to rub against his belly. “Modifications.”_ _ _ _

____“Oh. _Oh _. Well. What’s changed?”___ _ _ _

______“The ribbing. And there’s new coding available. What-“_ _ _ _ _ _

______A quiet buzzing started up between the two mechs, centered around the former Enforcer’s interface array. Rodimus couldn’t conceal his shock when he realized what was happening. “Magnus- is it- ?”_ _ _ _ _ _

_______Vibrating _. Holy Primus. Rodimus owed Brainstorm big time.__ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Unlike the prime’s building excitement, Ultra Mganus was staring down at his spike with horror written plainly in his field. “Rodimus, I don’t think we should-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Ooooh, no you don’t. We’re so going to try it out.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“But, what if-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Easy, easy. I don’t wanna try it right now.” Rodimus reached down between them and took the vibrating spike in his hand. The thought of it being inside of him, hammering against his ceiling nodes… Rodimus almost changed his mind._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________He gave the aching member a few loose tugs, listening as Ultra Magnus’ vents became more labored. “I do wanna try it sometime. But this is our first time together. I want it to be just you and me. Nothing else.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The bigger mech made a soft whining sound when Rodimus drew his thumb over the organ’s sensitive tip. His spike ached with need, his transfluid chamber tight and full. It had been so long since he’d self-serviced, even longer since he’d interfaced. “I love you so, my little prime.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I love you, too, Mags.” Rodimus released the spike and lay back as Ultra Magnus moved over him. He lay himself back on the berth, suddenly feeling a little shy._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________As he lined up their interface arrays, Ultra Magnus couldn’t help but think back on how this had all happened. He remembered the way Rodimus had been strangled in Megatron’s fist. The way that the prime he loved almost died in his arms as Magnus raced to the medbay._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Ultra Magnus guided the spike’s tip into the welcoming valve. The former Enforcer had to slow down when he felt the sudden urge to rut into the other mech. He didn’t expect to last very long as it was. If Rodimus’ flaring field and biolights were any indication, the prime wouldn’t last either._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________The prime fought to stay still as the bigger mech’s length sank into him, brushing against every node on its way in. He could feel Ultra Magnus trembling slightly as he pushed inside. Even with the foreplay, Rodimus’ valve was snug around the intrusion, clenching down every so often as it was stretched. When he finally heard their hips meet each other with a clang, the red mech couldn’t help the sigh that escaped him. Rodimus had never felt so full. “Mags, you’re- s-so big-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Careful not to cause his partner any discomfort, Ultra Magnus withdrew and thrust his hips forward cautiously. Rodimus released a weak cry, his field a mess of chaotic emotions as his hands scrabbled at the blue mech’s armor. Ultra Magnus reached and wove his fingers into one of the prime’s shaking hands before pinning it to the berth beside Rodimus’ helm. “I am here, little love. I am here.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Almost immediately, the prime’s field ceased it’s panicked writhing. Rodimus’ leg struts went limp on either side of Magnus’ waist. “Move, Mags, please move-“  
“Patience, Rodimus.” The blue mech gave a series of shallow bucks into the prime’s yielding valve. Thick globs of lubricant slid out around his straining spike as the calipers struggled to pull him in deeper. The feeling, coupled with the desperate look in Rodimus’ optics, were almost more than Ultra Magnus could handle._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________As Magnus began to set a slow pace, hugging the red mech to him, Rodimus found himself unable to suppress his cries. Every movement of the former Enforcer pressed the head of the spike against his ceiling nodes, causing the prime to stiffen and his valve to tighten with pleasure. “S-So good-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“You are so p-precious to me- Rodimus-“ The speedster felt Ultra Magnus drag in a steadying vent as his movements became faster, deeper, more desperate. “So tight- so perfect- _all mine _-“___ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Rodimus could feel Ultra Magnus’ thrusts becoming increasingly sporadic as his overload neared. It wouldn’t be long and the prime was determined for his lover to overload first. He wanted to see the former Enforcer clearly when the blue mech reached his finish. “Come for me, Mags- I’m y-yours-“_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Ultra Magnus stiffened, his optics blazing white. A few aborted jerks of his overheating chassis followed and a broken groan came from Rodimus’ intended as the big mech tumbled into his overload. In a last ditch attempt to silence himself, Magnus bit down on the pillow beneath Rodimus helm, losing control as he continued rutting into his beloved prime._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Hot spirts of transfluid hit his ceiling node, driving Rodimus to his own completion. With nothing to muffle his yell, the speedster hid his face in Ultra Magnus’ neck as he let the pleasure take him. He soon became aware of nothing but the spike buried in his valve as the blue mech continued to slam into him, emptying his transfluid reserves into his lover._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________One particularly deep thrust caused the spike’s pointed head to tear through Rodimus’ gestation chamber wall. The brief moment of pain was quickly eclipsed by a new pleasure that the prime had never felt before as transfluid flooded his chamber._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________Without a spark bond, there was no chance for him to get sparked. But Rodimus’ body reacted all the same and his valve began to hungrily milk at the spike, coaxing more transfluid from the trembling blue mech. Ultra Magnus, his face still pressed into the pillow, distantly felt his overload prolonged and couldn’t stop the scream he released into the fabric caught between his denta._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________When the former Enforcer’s last transfluid reserves had been exhausted, Ultra Magnus had just enough processor speed left to avoid collapsing on top of his smaller partner. He just barely managed to pull his depressurizing spike free before slumping into his side and weakly drawing his beloved to his chest._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________He was completely spent and had begun to drift off into recharge when a small golden hand came to rest on his cheek. The former Enforcer opened his darkening optics to see the equally dazed optics of Rodimus looking back at him. The little prime was smiling lazily. “Thank you, Mags.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________The tired blue mech perked up slightly. “For what do you thank me, Rodimus?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“For saving my life. For staying with me. For making love to me and for making me feel worth it. Thank you.” The young prime was oddly sincere, the usual bravado missing from his voice._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________“You have quickly become the light that I follow, my prime. I would go anywhere with you and I would do anything to keep you happy and safe.” Ultra Magnus leaned in to kiss Rodimus’ cooling forehelm. “Rest now. I will be with you when you wake.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________The speedster nestled against the other mech’s chest and listened to the hum of Magnus’ spark as he allowed recharge to take him. Ultra Magnus curled himself around his intended protectively, surrounding his beloved with both his body and his field. As Rodimus’ venting slowed and his optics faded to black, the bigger mech thanked Primus once more for blessing him with such a precious gift before falling into recharge himself._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


	45. Chapter 45

Rodimus was still in recharge when Ultra Magnus woke. 

The blue mech managed to untangle himself from his intended’s arms and slip off of the berth. As quietly as a mech his size could, Magnus set about cleaning the worst of the dried fluids from himself, Rodimus and the berth covers. Finding the effort futile, the former Enforcer gently sat beside the speedster. As he drew a soothing hand down the twitching spoiler if his intended, Magnus whispered. “Wake up, my prime. We must get cleaned up before our next shift.”

Clearly still in recharge, the captain swatted away Magnus’ hands. “Don’ wanna. I’ll go it later.”

“Don’t be difficult, Rodimus.” When the speedster continued to grumble and push him away, Ultra Magnus sighed heavily. “Do not make me carry you to the washracks.”

An optic peaked up at him and a hint of mischief entered the red mech’s field. “I’d like to see that.”

The former Enforcer looked down at the other bot for a moment, considering. Then, without a further word, he leaned down and scooped Rodimus into his arms. 

Ultra Magnus ignored the squawk of surprise that came from the prime as Rodimus was lifted bridal style into the bigger mech’s hold. A peel of laughter came from the speedster, so happy and carefree that it made the SIC’s spark skip a turn. As he made his way toward the washracks, he felt the mech in his arms stretch up to press a kiss under his chin.

He kept the wriggling speedster in his arms as he started the solvent shower, balancing Rodimus against his chest. The former Enforcer would’ve loved to share a bath with his intended, but it appeared that the tiny washracks would have to do for the time being. Carefully, Ultra Magnus lowered his precious cargo to the floor. “How was your recharge?”

Rodimus stepped forward under the solvent and the blue mech watched the prime’s plating glinter under the spray. He flared his spoiler wide, scattering droplets as he did. “Pretty good. I’m a little sore, but I expected that. You?”

“I rested well. I did not hurt you, did I?”

“Hm? Oh no, not that kind of sore.” Rodimus reached for a bottle of polish from one of the caddies and went about lathering it in his hands. He looked over at Magnus as he began rubbing it into his plating with a cloth. As he worked the cloth against his armor, the prime seemed almost bashful when he looked up at his intended. “I’ve never felt like this before. What we did was… pure.” Rodimus smiled then, obviously a little unsure of what to think. “That’s the only way I can describe it, I guess. Pure.”

The prime passed the bottle to Ultra Magnus who took it clumsily in his hands. He studied it for a moment, unsure of what to do. The former Enforcer usually used plain soap; he wasn’t the type of mech to purchase any kind of self-indulgent items. Magnus only ever purchased what was necessary to keep up a clean and orderly appearance. He selected a cloth from the caddie on the wall and carefully tried to copy Rodimus’ circular movements as he spread the polish.

A laugh distracted him from his work and the blue mech turned to find the speedster reaching toward him. “I’m guessing you’ve never polished you armor before, huh?” Ultra Magnus surrendered the cloth to his intended’s outstretched hand, unsure of what to expect. 

Rodimus came closer and began massaging the polish into the former Enforcer’s plating, talking the whole time. “See, you have to push down when you do it. Like when you’re taking off wax. Have you ever gotten a hot wax before? It’s amazing! I remember one time Drift and I-“

But Ultra Magnus couldn’t pay attention to the rambling prime. His entire focus was centered around the small golden hand as it rubbed cirlces on his chest and abdominal plating. Rodimus kept the pressure constant as he worked the polishing agent into the blue armor’s surface, only moving onto the next area when the metal shown with a healthy shine. 

Magnus barely heard his smaller companion as the speedster worked down each of his legs. Concealed within the Magnus armor, Minimus Ambus was trembling with want. He wished that he were in his irreducible form so that he could feel Rodimus’ touch without the buffer of the Magnus armor.

Before he could verbalize his desire to the other mech, Rodimus was backing away and admiring his work. “All done! What do you think?”

While Magnus had been imagining the prime’s hands on his true form, Rodimus had finished polishing Ultra Magnus’ chassis. The former Enforcer looked down at himself as the solvent continued to pour down over his massive frame. The difference was immediately noticeable. The blue of his plating had been scrubbed thoroughly and bore none of the paint transfers it had accrued during their earlier activities. Now, it glinted under the lighting, catching all of the gradual curves and sharp angles.

“Do you like it? If you don’t, we could try another-“

Magnus swept his smaller intended into a bruising kiss before he could stop himself. Rodimus made a soft noise in surprise, but soon returned the gesture, laughter dancing through his field. Ultra Magnus allowed himself to relax into the kiss as the solvent fell over them and glided along their rapidly-heating frames.

A notification slid up on his HUD, momentarily distracting the blue mech. Reading it quickly, Magnus pulled away from his intended with no small amount of regret. “Rodimus, my shift…”

Ultra Magnus hadn’t expected the prime to immediately step back, an equally remorseful look in his optics. Really, the SIC had expected more of fight from the speedster before him, or at least a pout. Instead, Rodimus moved away to turn off the solvent spray. “Yeah, I know. We should probably dry off.”

The blue mech watched his intended as the captain went about fetching towels for both of them. “Is there something wrong, my prime?”

“No. Why?”

“I just did not expect you to be so… understanding.”

Rodimus came back to hand the former Enforcer a clean, dry towel. “I know it’s important to you, Mags. That should be enough for me, right?”

“I… thank you, Rodimus.” The mature response gave the bigger mech pause as he dabbed the stray droplets of solvent from his plating. It soon became apperant just how much of a difference the polish made. His armor was even more gloriously shiny when dry than when it was in the washracks. Rodimus had done a wonderful job. “And thank you for this as well. I did not expect the difference to be so pronounced. The process was also quite relaxing.”

“Yeah? We’ll have to do it against some time then. I have a few more ideas that might relax you.”

The prime coughed suggestively and winked. Ultra Magnus felt himself blush at the implication and again imagined his lover’s hands, so firm and gentle against his irreducible form. It was almost enough to convince the SIC that his shift could wait. In the end, he looked away and rebooted his vocalizer. “We can discuss such ideas at a later time.”

“Sounds good to me.” Rodimus finished toweling off and made his way out of the wash area. Magnus had to shake himself when he caught his optics following the prime’s aft. Chastising himself and his sudden lack of self-control, the blue mech moved after his intended.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mags is helm-over-peds for his little prime. There's no hope for the poor guy now.


	46. Chapter 46

Drift stretched in his conjunx arms, yawning happily as Ratchet squeezed him tighter against his chest. The medic mumbled something unintelligible and borrowed further against the swordsmech’s neck. It was always a treat to see his grumpy mate so unguarded and restful. It was a side of Ratchet that few got to see.

The white speedster slipped from his berthmate’s grasp and made his way out of the berth room. He cast a final look back at where Ratchet still lay in recharge, soft snores coming through his vents. As quietly as he could, Drift cued the berthroom door closed behind himself.

Watching the old medic come apart in his hands never got old. For all his angry complaining and sass, Ratchet had an addictive O-face. As Drift moved to collect his energon, he replayed the latest session with his conjunx.

Ratchet had surrendered to the swordsmech, exhaustion and hunger burning simultaneously in his field when he’d arrived at Drift’s hab. The speedster hadn’t seen him in at least three shifts when the medic finally stumbled in, under-fueled and in terrible need of a defrag. After promising his conjunx relief, Drift had been able to get two cubes of energon into the ambulance before Ratchet dragged him in for a kiss.

Early on in their courtship, Drift found that the former CMO had trouble falling into recharge. No matter how tired he was, Ratchet could never quite calm his racing processor. It seemed that the mech was always on high alert, always expecting somebot to need him. As a result, the doctor rarely got a full recharge or a proper refuel.

When Drift had first shared a berth with him, the white speedster hadn’t thought it would work out. His intended had been constantly plagued with nightmares and the acute inability to lie still through the cycle. Though Ratchet had never admitted it, Drift knew that when they’d started their relationship the CMO had been about to break.

Drift stirred his energon thoughtfully, remembering the first time they’d interfaced. 

It had been right after Ratchet came to find him. The medic hadn’t been able to recharge or refuel, constantly pacing and trying to keep the swordsmech in his sights at all times. Drift had led him to the berth and kissed the CMO until the ambulance hadn’t been able to form complete sentences. 

Even though Ratchet had taken the dominant position many times after, the first time had been Drift. The speedster had driven the old medic to the edge and had held him there, only allowing him to overload when Ratchet finally begged for it. Drift would never forget the way Ratchet’s optics had rolled back into his helm, flaring white. He would never forget how the ambulance’s chassis had spasmed like electricity passed through it or how the his final cry of ecstasy ended abruptly with a shorted-out vocalizer.

But perhaps the most important thing that Drift had observed was the immediate recharge that followed. Ratchet always fell into recharge following a powerful overload, becoming limp and pliant in the speedster’s protective embrace. The medic’s trust that Drift would keep him safe during such a vulnerable time had always brought tears to the one-time assassin’s optics.

Drift had always made sure to be there when his conjunx awoke. He always made sure that Ratchet came around in the cradle of his arms and to the gentle caresses of his field and hands. The medic would never admit to it, but Drift knew that Ratchet appreciated it to comfort.

The swordsmech downed the rest of his energon and stood from the couch. The former CMO would be waking up soon.

When Ratchet had dragged himself in from his three-shift absence, Drift had said nothing and led his fidgeting conjunx to the berthroom. So slowly and so carefully, the speedster had coaxed his grumbling beloved onto the berth and had convinced Ratchet to lay on his back. After a little making out and sweet talking, the medic’s modesty panel had popped open. Drift had watched as Ratchet’s face was quickly stained by an embarrassed blush.

Drift had descended upon his conjunx’s valve like it was made of the most expensive energon goodies, burying his face against the plush folds. Even though the scent was intoxicating and the swordsmech would rather be putting something else in the warm valve, Drift forced himself to go slowly. The point wasn’t to get Ratchet up and awake. It was to relax him.

The speedster took his time, eating out his beloved mate with gentle scrapes of his fangs and long, deep strokes of his glossa. Ratchet moaned, occasionally grinding down against Drift’s face, but mostly giving weak little cries as his overload steadily built. As the medic neared his crest, Drift used his glossa to massage the plump lips and anterior node. Such languid movements, coupled with presses of comfort via his field, eventually brought Ratchet into an overload that ended with a well deserved recharge.

As Drift moved to go back to the berth where his conjunx still lay, he thought of his amica. Rodimus had been through so much, had survived more than many bots had. For a long time, the prime had suffered in silence. How had Drift not seen what was happening? The swordsmech had asked himself that question at least a thousand times while Rodimus had lay recovering in the medbay. Ratchet had eventually forced Drift out, insisting that he could do nothing for his injured amica.

The swordsmech opened the door to his berthroom. Rodimus had almost died. Drift had been so terrified when he’d seen Ultra Magnus scoop up his Rodimus and start running for the medbay immediately. The loss of his best friend… well, he wasn’t sure if he wouldn’t been able to recover.

As he crawled back into the berth beside his conjunx, Drift was reminded of the way that Ultra Magnus looked at the prime. Any bot with optics could see that the former Enforcer adored the captain, maybe even loved him. There was no doubt that the pair of them harbored deep feelings for each other.

Ratchet latched onto the swordsmech’s plating with a powerful grip the moment that the speedster snuggled up against him. The medic awoke no further, however, and quickly settled back down to rest his helm against Drift’s chest. The TIC lay back fully and wrapped his field around to brush against his resting conjunx’s plating with an almost solid presence. The action earned a sigh from the former CMO.

As Drift himself slowly fell back into recharge with his mate settled firmly against him, he prayed that his amica would one day experience something similar. After everything that he’d been through, Rodimus deserved such contentment and love.


	47. Chapter 47

Ultra Magnus dragged a fingertip through the moisture at the base of his glass. Unable to sit still or alone in his hab, the big mech eventually gave up and made his way to Swerve’s. Fortunately, Rodimus’ shift on the bridge would end soon-

What had come over him? Magnus had once loved his alone time. He used it to study the law and write reports. But since he’d become involved with the prime, he hadn’t been able to focus on even reading the Autobot Code. His reports were shorter, his recharges deeper. The former Enforcer had even started trying out a little of the polish that Rodimus had given him as a courting gift soon after their first interface.

As Swerve refilled his spritzer and wandered away, the blue mech murmured a quick thanks and settled back into the booth cushion. It had been several cycles since he and Rodimus shared their first interface. Since then, they’d gradually spent more time together until every off shift found them at one or the other’s habsuite. They’d recharged together, refueled together, played games and watched vids together. They’d even spent time going out with Ratchet and Drift. In all of his creation, 

Ultra Magnus had never expected to find such joy as he did when he was with his intended. 

The prime was ever creative when it came to making love. Just the thought of their most recent interface sent zings of desire straight to Magnus’ interface array. Rodimus had been more than happy to present his aft and press his face into the berth, wiggling his pert rear inticingly-

What had come over him?

The big mech nodded to Cyclonus as the seeker walked past him. The ex-Decepticon grunted a greeting and made his way to his own solitary corner, no doubt waiting for Tailgate. After what he’d experienced with Rodimus, Ultra Magnus was no longer surprised when he thought about the mismatched couple that Cyclonus and Tailgate made. 

Ultra Magnus glared down thoughtfully at his spritzer. He’d asked Rodimus to meet him at Swerve’s after the captain’s shift ended. Even though he’d had plenty of time to think it over, the former Enforcer still wasn’t sure how to have the conversation ahead.

Within the armor, Minimus Ambus’ spark spun quickly with anticipation. How could one just talk about it? They’d interfaced exactly six times by Magnus’ count. He’d felt the prime’s body against his own more times than that. Why did he suddenly need-

“Hey, Mags!”

Rodimus bounded up to the booth and slid in easily before Ultra Magnus could react. The prime flashed a smile at his intended as he waved at Swerve over behind the bar. “Just the regular, Swerve! So. What’s up?”

As the minibot trotted over with Rodimus’ highgrade in hand, the former Enforcer shook his helm at the bartender. “My prime, I believe you would prefer a clear processor for the discussion that we are about to have.”

“Oh. Is everything okay?” Rodimus nodded to Swerve who shrugged and took the oil back to the bar. “Is it one of the reports? Did a fight happen while I was on shift? Did you-“

“It is nothing concerning the ship. It concerns our relationship.”

Though he tried to hide it, nervousness rose in the speedster’s field. “Are we okay, or-“

“Calm yourself, my little love. It not a problem that I wish to discuss, but an idea.”

With optics narrowed in interest, Rodimus settled down somewhat and leaned closer to his intended from across the table. “Yeah?”

“Well, you see…” Ultra Magnus took in a steadying vent, trying to find the words. But even when he knew what he wanted to say, the glyphs seemed to be firmly stuck in his vocalizer. “Rodimus, I… I wish to, um…”

“Mags? Are you sure it’s not something bad?”

When he looked up from the table to meet his intended’s gaze, Ultra Magnus saw true fear in the other mech’s optics. The former Enforcer felt terrible for being the one to put such an expression on his love’s face. “No, no, I assure you. It is… Rodimus, I wish to give you something. A gift, if you would accept it.”

Rodimus optics brightened considerably when he heard that it really wasn’t something bad. “Oh. But I don’t have anything for you. Again.”

“It is not a physical object.” The blue mech steeled himself and spoke as quickly and as quietly as he could. “I desire to interface with you in my irreducible form. As Minimus Ambus. If you will have me.”

At first, the prime just stared, saying nothing. Then, he gave his intended a wide smile, one that made Magnus’ frame relax instantly with its pure intent. “I’d like that. Is that the gift?” Without meeting the speedster’s optics, the former Enforcer nodded. “I said that I loved you, Mags. That doesn’t have anything to do with what you look like, you know? I’m happy to have you any way you pick, whether it’s as Mims or as Mags.”

Ultra Magnus still couldn’t bring himself to look up as he struggled to clear the lump from his throat. “Rodimus, may we continue this conversation at a more private location?”

“Sure. Mine or yours?”

“Mine, if that is alright with you.”

The prime gave him another gorgeous smile. “Sounds good to me. You sure you’re okay? You seem stressed or something.”

“I shall explain further upon reaching my hab.”

As he stood, Ultra Magnus downed the remainder of his spritzer. For a brief moment, he wished that he’d chosen something with more highgrade in it. Perhaps then he wouldn’t be so stiff and uptight. But as he followed Rodimus from the bar, the blue mech was glad that he hadn’t ordered something stronger. He would need all of his faculties for what was about to happen. Minimus could not have the effects of highgrade clouding his senses. 

With nervous energy still saturating his field and frame, the SIC reached and took his intended’s smaller hand in his own. Radius looked up at him as they walked, his field betraying his excitement. A soft grin was on the prime’s lips as he lifted the bigger mech’s hand to his mouth. Upon placing a kiss on it, the speedster lowered the hand but kept their hands interlocked until they arrived at the former Enforcer's habsuite.


	48. Chapter 48

The moment they’d stepped inside his habsuite, Ultra Magnus had excused himself and left Rodimus alone on the couch. The prime had watched the unusually quiet mech go and settled down into the red throw that always lay across the couch’s back. The material served to sooth Rodimus racing spark as he snuggled his face into it.

Magnus had offered no explanation and quickly disappeared into the side room. It was the room where the prime knew the former Enforcer kept the armor when he wasn’t in it. As he waited for his intended to return and tell him what was going on, he reviewd their earlier conversation at Swerve’s.

The blue mech wanted to interface without the armor. It had been no big deal to the speedster until he remembered the last time he’d seen Minimus outside of the armor. It had been back when Rodimus misread the situation, when he’d begun kissing and touching the sleepy little mech on his berth. It had ended in disaster and with Rodimus thinking that he’d lost everything. 

When the bigger mech admitted to wanting to interface in his irreducible form, it had at first excited the young prime. He had been looking forward to experiencing pleasure with his intended in every form and way that he could. But Rodimus had also read the clear discomfort in Ultra Magnus’ field. As he chewed nervously on the edge of the blanket, the captain couldn’t help but let the processing trees form in his helm.

His mounting anxiety continued to grow with every passing klik. What if he hurt his smaller intended? Was Minimus a valve or spike mech? Would they be compatible? How would they-

The side door slid open and Minimus Ambus stepped into the room.

Rodimus watched the green mech come toward him from across the room and the prime couldn’t suppress the little thrill of happiness at the sight of his intended. Minimus had clearly tried out the polish on his irreducible form as well. The green and white armor that adorned the former Enforcer shown brightly under the habsuite lights, glinting as the blushing mech came closer to the couch. The speedster couldn’t help himself as he took in his lover’s slender waist and its accompanying biolights. The flaring lights encircled the little bot’s waist, fluttering in waves that ended just above Minimus’ modesty panel. Rodimus licked his lips with an increasingly dry glossa.

While the young prime fought to contain his field, Minimus spoke, his voice trembling. “I am afraid that I have kept something from you.”

The words got Rodimus undivided attention. “What is it? Is everything okay?”

“I hope that everything is, my prime.” The green mech moved to sit beside his intended on the couch, his posture straight and stiff. 

Minimus’ field was a mess, so entangled that there was no way for Rodimus to decipher all of the emotions there. “Is it something I can help you with? Are you sick? If you are, I’m sure that Ratchet or First Aid could-“

“Rodimus.”

There was something in his intended’s voice that silenced Rodimus. Unsure as to whether or not it was the right move, the prime scooted closer to Minimus. Cautiously, he took the former Enforcer’s tiny hand in his own. Even though he wished Minimus would hurry up and tell him what was wrong, the speedster forced himself to be still and silent.

The small green mech swallowed quickly before he began to speak. He kept his hand in his intended’s, squeezing it tightly, like he was afraid Rodimus would leave. “I have kept something from you. I regret not telling you outright as I know it would have saved us both some pain. I never offered an explanation for my reaction to interfacing the last time I was without the Magnus armor. I will explain it now.”

Minimus Ambus took a shallow vent and lifted his optics to his intended. Rodimus left his field open and full of forgiveness, even though he didn’t know what it was for yet. He took the small hand between his own and nodded for for Minimus to continue.

The former Enforcer sighed. “As you know, I do not take acts of intimacy lightly. I have interfaced before, it is true… but never outside of the armor.”

Minimus’ optics were wide and uncertain. “I hope that it does not change your view of me, Rodimus. But the truth is that I am still sealed. I have been since I came online. If you will still have me, I wish for it be you who takes them.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAHHHHHH DON'T LOOK AT ME


	49. Chapter 49

“You’re… sealed?”

“Yes, Rodimus. I am.”

The prime took a deep vent and released it. Then he took another, and then another. The prime had never broken another mech’s seals before. He knew that it was unpleasant whether one’s partner was experienced or not. Primus, he was in way over his helm-

“Mims, it’s okay. This is fine. It’s fine.” _Slag, slag, slag- ___

__Minimus was sealed. The more Rodimus thought about it, the more it made sense. Of course he was sealed. He’d had the Magnus armor forever and had only just begun going around the Lost Light without it. They hadn’t even known Minimus was beneath the armor until recently._ _

__On top of having the Magnus armor between himself and the world, Minimus had been tasked with upholding the Tyrest Accord. When would he have had a chance to be outside of the Magnus armor during the war? Plus, Ultra Magnus was a bot of the law. He wouldn’t have had much time for intimacy of any kind._ _

__“Rodimus, I am deeply sorry. I did not intend to cause you distress-“_ _

__The prime abruptly realized how he must look. He quickly snapped his mouth closed, still trying to recover from the shock of Minimus’ confession. “I’m not distressed or anything. Just surprised. Are you sure you want it to be me?”_ _

__“I am sure. This is something that I have kept for the right time. I believe that that time is now. With you.”_ _

__The little load-bearer looked up at Rodimus with blatant trust in his optics and the speedster felt a lump settle in his throat. How did he come to deserve a bot like the one before him? “I don’t want to hurt you.”_ _

__“I know that you would not hurt me on purpose, my prime. I must reiterate that you do not have to do this. If I have mistaken our intents with each other-_ _

__Rodimus made his choice. He’d made it long ago. The prime leaned forward and pressed a warm kiss to the smaller mech’s mouth, cutting Minimus off mid-sentence.  
The load-bearer blinked with surprise a few times before ultimately moving toward his intended, returning the kiss fervently._ _

__When Rodimus finally pulled back, the speedster immediately reached to steady the wobbling green mech. Minimus’ optics were a little glassy as he vented harshly through his mouth. “Am I correct in your intentions then, Rodimus?”_ _

__“Mims… are you sure you want it to be me?” The red mech studied his intended carefully._ _

__“I am certain.”_ _

__The prime ran a golden hand down the side of his lover’s helm. The smaller mech leaned into the touch and lay one of his own hands over Rodimus’. “We should probably go to your berth then.” Minimus nodded and moved to stand, still appearing to be a little disoriented._ _

__Before he could balance himself on his peds, Minimus felt himself lifted into a strong embrace. He couldn’t quite suppress his squeal as he was settled against his companion’s warm chest. When the little green mech glared up at him, Rodimus laughed and bent to place a chaste kiss on his audial. “Let me carry you. Just this one time. You get to carry me all the time so it’s my turn.”_ _

__Deciding not to push the matter, the former Duly-Appointed Enforcer of the Tyrest Accord allowed himself to relax into the cradle made by Rodimus Prime’s arms. A single golden finger appeared and tilted his helm up until he was looking straight into the speedster’s optics. They were a deeper shade than usual, holding none of the excitable energy that usually resided in them. Those beautiful blues closed as the prime bent his helm, claiming Minimus’ lips in a gentle but heated kiss._ _

__It seemed to go on for cycles. Or maybe it really was just a few kliks. Either way, Minimus’ vents were heavy when his lover finally pulled away. Rodimus smiled down at him, his field a collage of happiness and adoration. The green mech realized that, while they’d been kissing, the prime had made it into the berthroom._ _

__“Are you ready?”_ _

__Minimus’ nodded, even when his first thought was a definite ‘no.’ He’d never thought about interfacing as Minimus, at least not until he met his intended. Almost from the moment he’d seen the reckless speedster, back during the war, Hot Rod had been a distant interest he’d had._ _

__But never had the load-bearer entertained the possiblity that he would find himself where he was now, laying beneath the gorgeous speedster and offering his seals to him as a lover. The thought sent a shiver through his frame._ _

__Rodimus dipped his helm forward slowly until he could nuzzle into the green bot’s neck cables. Another noise broke from Minimus’ vocalizer, this time a soft moan.  
The prime was merciless as he licked at the exposed throat cables, whispering reassurances everytime he moved to a new spot. By the time Rodimus came up for air, the load-bearer was squirming against the berth covers._ _

__“I love you, Mims.”_ _

__“I-I love too, Rodimus.”_ _

__The prime took in the sight of his smaller lover on the berth. Minimus was trembling slightly with anticipation, his optics bright and a little unfocused. From where he supported himself above the green mech, Rodimus became aware once more of their size difference. He wondered if Ultra Magnus was always as worried about injuring him as he was of hurting Minimus just then._ _

__Despite his growing arousal at the submissive tone Minimus had taken on, the speedster made sure to go slowly. He took his time stimulating every sensor that he could find on his intended’s slight frame, taking mental notes every time his actions earned a whimper or sigh from the mech beneath him. Rodimus kissed and licked and sucked everywhere that he could reach and relished in the stoic little bot’s crumbling control._ _

__One such action proved to be too much for the load-bearer. Minimus had just tilted his helm back, trying to draw in more air for his over-taxed fans. As he did, Rodimus wrapped his lips around one of the green mech’s most well-hidden fuel lines, one usually concealed within his throat cables. After soaking it in oral lubricant, the prime sucked hard enough to bruise._ _

__With a halting gasp from Minimus, the former Enforcer’s modesty panel snapped back. The prime finished his leisurely ravaging of his smaller partner’s throat cables before pulling away and looking down the length of his lover’s body._ _

__As Rodimus began to move down the berth, he became aware of the growing trepidation in Minimus’ field. He froze instantly and gazed down at the other mech. Minimus was looking up at him with wide optics, the red orbs fever-bright. “Mims? You good?”_ _

__“Yes, my prime. Please continue.”_ _

__After giving his intended a final kiss, Rodimus scooted down the berth until he could see Minimus’ interface array, bared for the first time._ _


	50. Chapter 50

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry ahead of time... I know nothing about seals soooo

Upon dropping to his knees at the edge of the berth, Rodimus finally got his first look at Minimus Ambus’ interface array. The view was far more erotic than it had any right to be.

The valve seal was plainly visible, permeable enough to allow the green mech’s arousal to show through it. Thick globs of lubricant already clung to the outside of the thin mesh, trailing through the valve’s swollen lips. Rodimus reached out a finger to press against the seal and found it to be healthy as it flexed and stretched under his fingertip’s pressure. Minimus stiffened and released a questioning whine. The prime planted a comforting kiss on the green mech’s inner thigh before continuing his exploration.

Just above the valve seal sat the spike seal. It was bowed out somewhat, a clear sign of Minimus’ growing arousal. This seal was made of tougher material and couldn’t be broken by the spike that it covered. If Rodimus’ memory was correct, this seal was the more difficult and painful to remove than the other seal. 

Experimenting, the speedster placed the flat of his glossa against the spike seal. He could feel the spike inside twitch and push harder from the other side as it strained to be released. A grunt of discomfort came from Minimus and Rodimus gave the hot seal a parting lick before moving away.

“R-Rodimus-“

Rodimus shifted until he could make optic contact with the smaller mech. Fear shown plainly on the load-bearer’s face. “Mims, you okay?”

“I am okay. Just nervous.”

“Is there anything I can do to make this easier?”

The little mech was shaking all over, his field a tumultuous storm of emotions. “I… perhaps if you talked to me? Told me what you were doing?”

“Okay, I can try that.”

Rodimus slid back down until his face was level with the green mech’s array. “I think we should start with your spike seal. I’m not gonna lie, it hurts the worst. It’s a dry seal and is tougher than the valve one.”

“O-Okay.”

The prime shimmied forward until he was able to drag his glossa across the spike seal once more. The seal itself bowed even further outward under his gentle licks as the spike beneath it tried to pressurize. Up on the berth, Minimus moaned and wiggled his hips and he clenched the berth covers in his tiny fists. Rodimus splayed his hand across the former Enforcer’s belly to hold him still as he continued his ministrations.

On the crest of one of Minimus’ pleasured whines, the red mech took the edge of the seal in his denta. With one tug, Rodimus tore it away, allowing the spike to jut out of the housing and into the air. A thin trail of energon wept from the seal’s jagged edges, quickly dispersed by the flood of natural lubricant that followed.

The green mech cried out loudly, his legs trying to close around Rodimus’ helm as he tried to curl upward and around the source of the pain. Quickly, the prime took the hardened spike into his mouth and swirled his glossa around the head. He bobbed his helm once, twice, and on the third time he took the spike to the hilt and held it there, feeling the head butt up against the back of his intake.

Minimus made a strangled noise, caught between the pain and a new pleasure he’d never felt so close up. It had always felt good getting head in the Magnus armor. But this was far more intense, far more intimate than anything he’d ever felt. It made the armor feel like a dampener.

When he felt his spike head pushing against Rodimus’ intake and then the red mech swallowing around it-

He overloaded hard, his peds kicking weakly as Minimus' body seized. Rodimus held on and continued swallowing around the spike, drawing the equipment further online. The first overload was usually dry as the system came online for the first time. Minimus’ hips jerked violently in Rodimus’ grip and his optics blazed white in his climax, but no transfluid would be available yet to show for it. Now that the spike seal had been taken, the rest of the interface array would begin the process of developing transfluid.

Rodimus released the spike with an audible pop and got his first real look at it. Unlike the Magnus armor, Minimus’ spike head wasn’t sharp. It was dark green and rounded. The shaft was white and had a line of red biolights running up each side that glowed sluggishly after the intense overload. For just coming online, the member was already a decent size and well suited for Minimus frame type. 

“How do you feel, Mims?”

The former Enforcer’s helm lolled where it lay on the pillow and Rodimus crawled up on the berth to lay beside him. When the smaller mech didn’t react to his movement, the prime began to worry. “Mims? Hey, I’m sorry I didn’t warn you, I thought it would be easier to-“

A hand rested lightly on the red mech’s arm and Rodimus looked up to find Minimus staring at him. The little mech’s face was serene, even as his field still reverberated with his overload and the remaining sting from his torn seal. “Thank you, Rodimus.”

“We can wait if you want to. Wait to do the valve one, I mean.”

The little load-bearer smiled sleepily at his intended before moving to plant a kiss on Rodimus’ nasal bridge. “If you are well with it, then I want to continue.” A glitter entered Minimus’ optics as his voice dropped to a whisper. “I had been hoping that you would spike me this cycle.”

Those words sent a bolt of desire straight to Rodimus’ own interface array and the prime had to reboot his vocalizer twice before he could speak through the static. “I think we can do that.”

“Alright then. I am ready if you are, my prime.” Though the former Enforcer’s field still pulsed with nervous energy, the certainty in it was also obvious. 

As he made his way back down the berth and caught a glimpse of the virgin valve waiting for him, Rodimus was taken off guard by his memory of Megatron. The silver mech hadn’t allowed Rodimus to use his spike when they interfaced. On top of that, Rodimus and Ultra Magnus had only interfaced a few times. It had just seemed natural for the former Enforcer to be the one doing the spiking.

Rodimus shook himself and resettled on his knees, eyeing the valve in front of him. Tiny biolights could be seen through the thin seal, flickering invitingly inside and promising a tight, warm channel for his spike. It was sure to be snug and wet and-

Primus, he hadn’t used his spike in _so long. _Rodimus doubted he’d last for any amount of time at all.__

__Taking Minimus’ thighs in his hands, he moved them to rest on his shoulders. The scent coming off of the slick valve in front of him was delicious, begging for Rodimus to bury his face in it. “I’m gonna start with some oral to get you relaxed. I can’t break this seal like this because it’s inside so I’ll use my spike for that.”_ _

__The green mech opened his mouth to reply, but his words died in a deep moan as Rodimus began licking the plush valve lips with long, even strokes._ _

__The prime pushed against the seal with his glossa, relishing in the juices that leaked through it and bathed his taste receptors. He pulled the glistening folds into his mouth and suckled on them, only to release them the next klik as he blew a warm exvent over his intended’s boiling mesh. The red mech’s actions only served to further agitate the valve and it drooled even more heavily around the seal. Rodimus lapped up the spilled juices and Minimus continued to squirm, whining helplessly as he was eaten out._ _

__Minimus gasped as his intended pulled back to admire his handiwork, marveling at the flushed valve before him. “Primus, Mims, you’re so fragging good. So perfect, so beautiful and you taste amazing…”_ _

__As if to illustrate, Rodimus dipped his helm a last time to slurp obscenely at the gathering fluids as they trickled from the green mech’s sensitive valve. “Rodimus, please…”_ _

__A pair of intense blue optics, blazing with arousal, met Minimus’ from the end of the berth. A moment later, Rodimus was crawling toward him, taking his time as he made his way up his intneded’s body. The prime soon hovered over him, supported by his arms on either side of the former Enforcer’s helm. Minimus didn’t miss how the red speedster was positioned between his legs, his still-closed modesty panel hot against the smaller mech’s bared valve._ _

__“Rodimus- it feels so good-”_ _

__At his intended’s words, the prime’s modesty panel opened and his spike pressurized out. It was already slicked with prefluid and the natural lubricant from within his spike housing. As Rodimus dropped to his elbows, the red and gold spike bobbed to slap against his belly, causing the speedster to groan. A golden palm moved to cradle the side of Minimus’ helm. “I love you, Minimus. With all my spark. Thank you for sharing this with me.”_ _

__“And I love you, my prime. There is no other that I would rather share this with.”_ _

__Rodimus lowered his body down until his spike head nudged at Minimus’ outer valve lips. The smaller mech couldn’t stop himself from cringing, already bracing for the coming pain. The prime delivered a soft kiss to the side of his helm. “Hold onto me.”_ _

__Minimus did as he was told, lifting his arms to wrap them around his beloved’s middle. When he slipped his fingers into the other mech’s transformation seams, the load-bearer buried his face in Rodimus’ neck._ _

__Knowing that it was best not to draw this part out, the prime maneuvered his hips until he was lined up with the other mech’s valve. Rodimus kissed the side of his intended’s helm. Then, he rammed his hips forward._ _

__The seal gave away easily, being well-lubricated and healthy. Rodimus was able to hilt himself fully in the first try. But the prime took only a moment to appreciate the walls pulsing around his underused spike before a yelp sounded against his neck. Beneath him, Minimus was gulping air through his vents and mouth while his valve fluttered with indecision, caught between pushing the intrusion out and drawing the spike further in. “Shh, Mims, it’s fine, it’s over, the bad part’s over-“_ _

__Rodimus sat back and began sprinkling kisses across his lover’s face, keeping his spike firmly inside the other mech as he did. Minimus’ optics were blown wide and his mouth hung open as the prime comforted him and went about whispering against his audial. “You’re doing so good, so beautiful, oh, Mims, I love you, I love you-“_ _

__“Primus, Rodimus, _move _.”___ _

____The prime pulled back. “Huh?”_ _ _ _

____“Move!”_ _ _ _

____Wasting no time, the speedster pulled his hips back only to sink his spike back in again, starting up a slow pace. With every push in, Minimus gasped. He tried to keep himself quiet, he really did. But Rodimus spike was hitting something deep inside of him and something on the outside was being hit with every thrust and-___ _

______The sounds made by the smaller mech were almost enough on their own to drive Rodimus into overload. As he continued to thrust into the wet heat of the other mech’s valve, the prime murmured into Minimus’ audials and ran his hands across his intended’s frame. Inside the valve, the little biolights pulsed and rubbed against the speedster’s engorged spike. The feeling as the biolights lining his spike dragged against them sent waves of pleasure straight to Rodimus’ spark. Soon, too soon, the prime could feel his overload approaching as his hips began to stutter, his rhythm faltering._ _ _ _ _ _

______The smaller of the two didn’t speak as his pleasure built, only making quiet moans low in his chassis. When Rodimus looked down at him, he admired his lover’s dim ruby optics and how his lips parted with soundless cries. Minimus’ increasingly sloppy valve made a wet squelch everytime the speedster sank into him, the walls struggling to pull him deeper._ _ _ _ _ _

______When the green mech stiffened suddenly and his vocalizer clicked against Rodimus’ audial, the prime felt the channel around his spike lock down hard. Unlike Minimus, the red mech couldn’t keep his ecstasy quiet. As his lover’s overload milked his spike, Rodimus tensed and allowed himself to cry out as he rutted his hips desperately into the tightness of Minumus’ valve._ _ _ _ _ _

______Minimus heard his prime’s cry of completion and felt the first hot spirts of transfluid fill his valve a moment later. Still lost in his own post-overload haze, the small mech barely registered it as Rodimus pulled his spike free and collapsed beside him on the berth._ _ _ _ _ _

______Distantly, the former Enforcer could feel the mess of transfluid and lubricant that dribbled from his fragged out valve. The sensation made him wince a little, but he quickly reminded himself that it wasn’t supposed to feel dirty. It was the result of something beautiful, something sacred that he’d shared with Rodimus. Besides, he was far too tired to worry about cleaning up the mess right then anyway._ _ _ _ _ _

______Beside him, he felt Rodimus stir. At the edge of consciousness, Minimus sensed the prime’s field reaching out to him, projecting love and the promise of safety. A golden hand moved to take the green mech’s smaller one in it’s hold as they both fell into recharge._ _ _ _ _ _


	51. Chapter 51

The trip back to Cybertron was a long one with many side-quests along the way. But with his intended by his side, Rodimus managed to guide them through it all as they fought their way home. When they finaly arrived in their home planet’s atmosphere, not a single spark had been lost on the way back.

The Lost Light arrived on Cybertron quietly and without much fanfare. The events that had taken place between the co-captains had been widely concealed from the populace so Megatron’s removal from the ship went smoothly and without ceremony. The silver mech had been in stasis ever since his battle with Ultra Magnus, kept securely locked in the brig. Thunderclash, fully recovered and as wonderful as ever, had been more than happy to stand guard over the warlord until they arrived back at Cybertron.

Once there, Rodimus was greeted personally by Starscream himself. The seeker had wasted no time in having Megatron hauled away and out of sight, his wings high and stiff until the former Decepticon leader had gone. Sharp ruby optics turned on the prime then, ever alert. “I was not surprised to hear of you predicament, captain.”

Rodimus forced himself to meet the intimidating jet’s gaze. There was something strange in the notoriously ruthless mech’s field. If the speedster was reading him right, Starscream was projecting something close to regret. 

The thought sent a chill through the prime. “I know that he will be tried justly.”

“Oh, but of course.”

Starscream grinned wolfishly, a fang peeking out as he turned his helm in the direction that Megatron’s still chassis had disappeared. Though Rodimus knew that he owed the ex-warlord nothing, he genuinely feared for him. The tables had turned dramatically and Starscream would show no mercy.

Just as the red speedster was preparing to bid the still smiling seeker farewell, Drift appeared at his side. “Ship’s refueled and ready to go, Roddy. Whenever you’re ready.”

Starscream kept his attention on Rodimus. His voice scratched slightly as it rose from his vocalizer and the prime wondered what could cause such a sound. “If you don’t already know, none of this was your fault.”

As Rodimus struggled to find words, Drift and Starscream connected optics. The seeker regarded the swordsmech before giving him the briefest nod. Rodimus watched as his amica returned the gesture and, without a further word, Starscream strode away.

Still unsure of what he’d just seen and heard, the prime stared after the jet until he spotted Wheeljack waiting back at the transport. Rodimus’ confusion only grew when Starscream’s talons gently brushed through the scientist’s fingers as he stepped through the door. Wheeljack looked away form the jet long enough to wave at Rodimus before he followed the seeker inside.

Once his fellow Wrecker had closed the door behind him, Rodimus turned to his best friend. “What the Pit was all that?”

Drift stayed silent until the transport rorared to life and took off. His mouth quirked slightly as they watched it go. “He thinks he owes me for something that happened a long time ago. And Wheeljack? They’re kind of intended.”

“ _What?! _But ‘Jack is a Wrecker! Wait a second. What’s he owe you for?”__

__Drift sighed before swatting at his friend’s helm playfully. “Does it matter? Wheeljack seems to keep Screamer in a good mood. And the story isn’t really mine to tell. He doesn’t owe me anything.”_ _

__“Aww, Drifter…”_ _

__But even Rodimus best Earth-puppy impression didn’t sway his amica. The swordsmech laughed. “Don’t you have your own intended to find? You know, the one that won’t be your intended for much longer?”_ _

__The reminder caused a fresh wave of anxiety to settle over Rodimus chest. Drift was right. He’d gotten so caught up in turning Megatron over to Starscream that it had overshadowed the date. Tonight was the night. Tonight, he and Ultra Magnus would become conjunx endura._ _

__Drift caught onto the swirling emotions in his amica’s field and gave his friend’s arm a squeeze. “It’s fine to be nervous about it. Primus knows, I thought my spark was gonna supernova when I said yes to Ratch. But once you get there, everything feels so natural.” The swordsmech leaned toward Rodimus conspiratorially as they began walking back to the docked Lost Light. “The interfacing is sooo much better, too, babe. _Everything _is better.”___ _

____“Really? It’s that different?”_ _ _ _

____“Pit, yes. No comparison. And the hard part is over. You two completed the Acts a long time ago.”_ _ _ _

____The pair stopped just outside the ship’s bay doors as Rodimus turned to his amica. “Yeah, but… I don’t know. I just hope he isn’t disappointed.”_ _ _ _

____“Why would he be?” Drift cocked his helm to the side, confusion in his face. The swordsmech was truly adorable when he wanted to be. One could almost believe that he hadn’t been one of the most feared Decepeticon’s during the war._ _ _ _

____The white speedster lay a hand on his best friend’s arm. “He loved you for a long time before you even knew. Trust me.”_ _ _ _

____As they made their way back up onto the Lost Light, Rodimus reached to pull his best friend against his chassis. “Thank you, Drift. For everything. I love you.”_ _ _ _

____The other speedster hugged him back and planted a kiss on Rodimus’ cheek. “Anytime, sweetspark. I love you, too.”_ _ _ _

____ _ _

____~o0o~_ _ _ _

____ _ _

____When Rodimus made his way to Ultra Magnus’ hab that night, the halls were silent. Not a single bot was out in the corridors. The party at Swerve’s had died down long ago and mechs and femme’s alike had been tasked with dragging their friends and intended’s home. Rodimus hadn’t been able to drink a drop._ _ _ _

____He’d seen his intended earlier in the cycle, when they’d finished refueling the ship and had departed Cybertron. Ultra Magnus had been at his station, standing slightly behind his captain’s shoulder. Apart from a brush of their fields and a shared look, Rodimus hadn’t spoken to the blue mech all day._ _ _ _

____His spark fluttered excitedly in his chest as Rodimus arrived at his SIC’s hab and entered the keycode. When the door opened, he was greeted with darkness and silence. “Mags? You here?”_ _ _ _

____What if his intended had forgotten? What if he’d changed is mind? They’d been planning on this night since Drift had presided over the official ceremony, several cycles ago. As the Third-in-Command, Drift had been able to conduct the conjunx endura ceremony between the Captain and the Second-in-Command. They’d decided to hold off on the actual spark bonding until Megatron had been returned to Cybertron. What if in the time that had elapsed, the former Enforcer had changed his mind? What if-?_ _ _ _

____“Hello, my little love.”_ _ _ _

____A single flame appeared in the darkness, accompanied by two pinpoints of blue. “Magnus?”_ _ _ _

____The flame soon illuminated the face of his mate as the bigger mech made his way around the room, lighting candles as he went. One by one, they began to cast a soft light around the hab until the prime could make out the trail of flickering light that led toward the berthroom. The romantic atmosphere had an immediate affect on the young speedster as his spark spun wildly in his chest._ _ _ _

____His optics were wide as Ultra Magnus finished, extinguished the lighter, and came toward him. For a mech is size, his steps were soft and almost soundless. “Will you bond with me, Rodimus on Nyon?”_ _ _ _

____Unable to speak and a little overwhelmed by everything around him, the prime nodded. The former Enforcer smiled kindly as he knelt before his intended, dropping to his knee. He reached and took Rodimus’ hand between his own. “If you will, go and make yourself comfortable. I’ll be in shortly.”_ _ _ _

____As the bigger mech released him and turned away, Rodimus made his way toward the berthroom in a daze. The candles around him blinked as he passed by, flickering as the air stirred in his wake. When the prime made it to the berthroom door, he took in the room. Magnus had definitely outdone himself._ _ _ _

____Pillows and blankets of all colors and shapes were strewn across the berth. The room was dimly lit by the candles that were placed around the room and their scent cloyed heavily in the captain’s vents. Instantly, he felt himself begin to calm and he recognized the mixture of smells being released by the candles. Ultra Magnus had definitely been talking to Drift-_ _ _ _

____“Rodimus? Is this acceptable?_ _ _ _

____The prime turned to find Minimus Ambus standing behind him in the doorway, the Magnus armor gone. Rodimus allowed himself a moment to take in the sight of his beloved as the firelight danced across spotless green plating. “It’s wonderful. You’re perfect, Mims.”_ _ _ _

____Even with the deeply shadowed surroundings, Minimus’ face took on an obvious blush. The former Enforcer came forward to take his mate’s hand in his own. “Shall we?”_ _ _ _

____As he and the green mech made their way up onto the berth, Rodimus reflected on every moment that had led him to holding Minimus in his arms. They’d survived impossible odds, both during and after the war. Together, they’d made it this far. Rodimus believed that there wasn’t a thing that they couldn’t do._ _ _ _

____The pair interfaced that night with no expectation of release. They rocked into each other, the sweetest sounds coming from each of them as they made love. Neither cared or bothered to check their HUDs, knowing that no one would interrupt their coupling. There was no need to rush, no need to be afraid. They took it slow, simply relearning each other’s bodies a final time before taking the leap._ _ _ _

____When Rodimus finally opened his chest plates and bared his spark for his lover to see, he felt none of his earlier anxiety. The light from his very being poured over Minimus’ features, bathing the smaller mech in living blue light. The prime felt his spark flare as his conjunx reached to run a finger across the casing._ _ _ _

____Minimus gazed at the Matrix-blessed spark that resided in his captain’s chest. The sight was far more than he had ever expected and he triggered his own chest plates apart. Despite his size, Minimus Ambus’ spark blazed into view with powerful ferocity, its load-bearing capabilities making itself known. The corona was a deep red and pulsed excitedly, sensing it’s soon-to-be bond mate nearby._ _ _ _

____When they connected optics, sparks pounding in their chests, any last feelings of uncertainty vanished into nothing. The powerful blue spark, the spark of a true prime, reached out toward the red one-percentor’s, coaxing the green mech’s spark out to dance. The sensation as the two reaching tendrils connected drew a strangled sound from Minimus Ambus and a moan from Rodimus Prime._ _ _ _

____When they could resist the pull no longer and fell together, their sparks became one and spoke a language older than Primus himself. Two pairs of optics, one blue and the other red, both matched as the souls of their owner’s collided, flashing pure white. Everything ceased to exist as they overloaded together and became of one mind, one spark, one being._ _ _ _

____As the euphoria began to wane, leaving them to collapse sideways on the berth with exhaustion, one voice echoed between them, a mantra created by their joined sparks. Though it’s language was as old as time, the glyphs were clear as Minimus and Rodimus faded into recharge:_ _ _ _

______I love you, I love you. Forever and always. ___ _ _ ___

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, guys, it's been a wild ride. I don't think I've ever written so much so quickly in my life! Anyway, it's been great and I can't wait to start the next one!
> 
> ~starseeker95

**Author's Note:**

> I saw something on Tumblr about Megatron and Rodimus' interactions in canon. I can't unsee that post and this happened. Usually, I'm a big Megarod fan.


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